Among Friends

[NicksmomESQ]

  Dr Phil says we must teach people how to treat us.I totally agree.Next time he tries to hone in on your meeting just politely say thank you “Joe” I got this.Then turn your back & lead your client away.

  Like others have said I would also keep a record of everytime he does this.It can never hurt to have all your ducks in a row.I’m a big believer in documentation.

[GCR18]

I think I'd pull him aside and nicely tell him his help isn't needed.  Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.  I've had others try to take credit for my work.  You have too toot your own horn.  I am horrible at doing that, but I am working on it.  

[jlkz]

@shortbreadlover 

Sometimes with certain folks you need to be blunt after trying to be low key with interrupters.

Your approach sounds good.  I would start it out though with a very strong visual non-verbal signal.  Turn to face him and use both hands to signal “stop” ( an X ) or a “T” for “ timeout “ and then your message.   This gives you more power than simple words.

Then, if you can, take the patron to a less intrusive spot to continue your assistance.  Let your boss know exactly what you have done.  It is also a good idea to start documenting his abusive behavior.

[chrystaltree]

You could try behaving like  real professional.  My guess is that not a single of you has ever spoken to him about this.  You all just complain behind his back so Mr. Butinsky  continues doing it.  The next time he does this, you should do two things.  "Say, thank you Bob.  I can handle with without your assistance" and continue helping the patron.  After that, take Mr. Butinsky aside where you can speak to him privately and nicely for firmly say  "Bob, please don't interrupt me when I am with a Patron. " I've been doing this a long time and I know what I am doing".  He'll stop.  He might not like you after that but he will stop his annoying behavior.  People only do stuff like this if other people let them.  It's like that he is trying to impress the boss.  Which is not at all a bad thing but don't let him do it at your expense.  

[LTT1]

@tessam 

thank you for the link!

@shortbreadlover 

The article has some good ideas... not the least of which is planning your strategy for taking ownership of your customers by saying the right thing to this other person.

I agree with them in the article about confronting the issue with the “over-stepper” in the right way earlier rather than later otherwise, I would be tempted (later) to loose my cool.

The job tactics being described seem so cut-throat, but I and members of my family have needed to handle these in the past.  As for me, I never came up with a workable technique but articles such as this one areca valuable help.💗

@shortbreadlover 

I hope you report back about the situation. Best of luck!

[SXMGirl]

@shortbreadloverTread lightly.  Thank him when he approaches you with a customer, but nicely tell him that you are taking care of everything.  Do not get nasty.

You have no idea what he was told when he was hired and you also really do not know why he was hired.  When you have someone like him, there is a back story.   Maybe asking him about his hiring experience would be a start.

[chrystaltree]

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@SXMGirl wrote:

@shortbreadloverTread lightly.  Thank him when he approaches you with a customer, but nicely tell him that you are taking care of everything.  Do not get nasty.

You have no idea what he was told when he was hired and you also really do not know why he was hired.  When you have someone like him, there is a back story.   Maybe asking him about his hiring experience would be a start.

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      Sorry but it does not matter what HE was told when he was hired.  No one told the OP or the other workers in the office that this guy was their new supervisor.  That's all that matters here, he's taking on a roll that hasn't been given to him.  His hiring experience what he was told is HIS business and absolutely no one else's.  OP's only issue here is a co-worker who doesn't know his place.  

[hckynut]

@shortbreadlover 

I have a standard reply to questions such as yours, which I  kinda view as a complaint, plus "blowing off steam". My method has been and always will be the same! Use your voice to tell "someone that can do something" not just commiserate with others.

That's  just me now!

hckynut(john)

[Chicagosuburbangirl]

I would feel sorry for him.

This man has zero self esteem.

Show him, and all others, by your good works the correct way to behave.

Sure and steady wins the race.

[Montana]

@shortbreadlover I thought these articles might interest you. The first one isn’t recent but still seems relevant.

”How to Manage Power-Mongering Coworkers: You Can Stand Your Ground”  by Lynn Taylor (2013)

”Five Ways to Deal With a Power Hungry Colleague” by Brinda Dasgupta  (2017)

I did not include links because I’m never sure if links to retail websites are included anywhere.