good friend problem....opinions please.... - Page 7

pigletsmom · ‎11-21-2011

Do we know if he actually said he was attracted to the lady or did he say she WAS attractive. I think you said he talks about everyone at the game and the wife zeroed in on her. If your friend just said "is she attractive" and he said yes that wouldn't really mean much.

jubilant · ‎06-10-2010

Had I been that woman, I would have been sorely tempted to say something like, "Well, I guess if that's what you want to do. I can understand. There are a couple of men who have asked me out for coffee that I think are quite attractive. Do you mind if I take them up on it"???? I think his reaction might just tell her all she needs to know.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

Ask your friend how she would like it if he aired her words and actions with his friends. like if he was asking them if they thought she was cheating.

cactusgal · ‎12-28-2011

Your friend should copy this picture and hand it to her husband.

KBEANS · ‎06-08-2020

There's no fool, like an old fool!

santorini · ‎03-09-2010

I do not understand why so many are objecting to this woman seeking advice from a friend. It's completely normal. It's not like the poster came on here and said, "hey, everyone. My friend, Evelyn Blackstock, who lives in the Forest Grove subdivision of Tulsa, Oklahoma, says that her husband, 62-year-old Mark Blackstock, is having an affair with a lady in her mid-40s whose name I believe is Sarah HusbandStealer."

Seriously! I've listened to many friends who came to me with suspicions. I wouldn't DREAM of turning them away or saying, "Nope. Can't listen. Take that story to someone else." GOOD friends DO listen and I'm sure most of them preface their comments with things like "You know that this will never be repeated and that I am here to support you no matter what happens. I will never advise you of what to do but I'm here to listen and be supportive. Please know that I am always here for you. If you need to talk in the middle of the night, don't hesitate to call."

Anonymous032819 · ‎03-29-2019

@pigletsmom wrote:
Do we know if he actually said he was attracted to the lady or did he say she WAS attractive. I think you said he talks about everyone at the game and the wife zeroed in on her. If your friend just said "is she attractive" and he said yes that wouldn't really mean much.

Exactly!

My mom always told my dad that he could look, but don't touch.

Meaning, my dad could notice a pretty woman walking down the street, but he could not do anything beyond that.

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.

jubilant · ‎06-10-2010

@Carmie wrote:
I have attracted to many men that I have had to work with over the years and even travel in the same car with them locally and at times go to lunch together. That's life.

I still had to go to work. It is quite normal to be attracted to people. I have never done anything that I wouldn't do in front of my husband or father with these men.

Just because there is an attraction, doesn't mean things will go further. If this man admitted he was attracted to a woman to his wife, I would guess he will behave himself.

I have even admitted to my DH that if I wasn't married, I would be all over a guy that I think is hot and sexy. If that bothered him, he didn't let me know.

@Carmie I agree that it is normal to be attracted to people. What's not normal, if you're married, is to dwell on thoughts of that person. Your "thought life" has the power to dictate your actions. Adultery starts in the mind and the mind reflects what's in the heart. If my husband ever told me, he would be all over another woman that he thought was hot and sexy if he wasn't married to me.....I would have serious doubts about my marriage.

suzyQ3 · ‎03-09-2010

@jubilant wrote:
@Carmie wrote:
I have attracted to many men that I have had to work with over the years and even travel in the same car with them locally and at times go to lunch together. That's life.

I still had to go to work. It is quite normal to be attracted to people. I have never done anything that I wouldn't do in front of my husband or father with these men.

Just because there is an attraction, doesn't mean things will go further. If this man admitted he was attracted to a woman to his wife, I would guess he will behave himself.

I have even admitted to my DH that if I wasn't married, I would be all over a guy that I think is hot and sexy. If that bothered him, he didn't let me know.

@Carmie I agree that it is normal to be attracted to people. What's not normal, if you're married, is to dwell on thoughts of that person. Your "thought life" has the power to dictate your actions. Adultery starts in the mind and the mind reflects what's in the heart. If my husband ever told me, he would be all over another woman that he thought was hot and sexy if he wasn't married to me.....I would have serious doubts about my marriage.

@jubilant, for me, my thoughts do not have the power to dictate my actions. And, boy or boy, that is a good thing!

~Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

KarenQVC · ‎05-13-2010

Just a thought. It never hurts for any woman to have an action plan. If he does this, I will do that. It makes the woman less vulnerable psychologically.