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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,454
Registered: ‎01-13-2013

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,013
Registered: ‎05-21-2010

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

Absolutely do not say anything to your husband's children. He asked you not to do so. We know nothing about the relationship that he has with his children. Was it always a close and loving relationship? Does he reach out to the children? Divorce and remarriage when children are involved is often complicated. Like others have said there is always 2 sides to every situation. I can understand your feeling in this but maybe next year plan a party and invite them. Let them know how much their Dad would love to see them. Maybe next year things will be different. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,584
Registered: ‎06-03-2010

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

@elizabethl123 Well let me be one of many to wish you a Happy Birthday.  89 years young is wonderful, what things you have seen over your lifetime! 

 

My dear Grandmother was born in the early 1900's and I can only imagine all the things that she had seen in her lifetime.  She is gone now and I miss her dearly. 

 

I hope you have some friends nearby and if you don't, you can always find a friend here who will be happy to "talk" and "visit" with you anytime that you wish.

 

download.jpg

 

 



......You look like I need a drink.....
Contributor
Posts: 33
Registered: ‎12-28-2013

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

Adeline, I want to wish you a belated Happy Birthday! So sorry your family was remiss in thinking of you on October 26th. Many people are too busy and think only of themselves. I think this is a big issue in our country. Slow down and enjoy everything and everyone around you! You never know when.....you know what I mean.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,498
Registered: ‎08-28-2010

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

It would be best not to say anything, as your husband has asked not to do so and from the original post it appears that his children do not have close relationship with him.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,055
Registered: ‎06-03-2018

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

This is one time, I recommend butting in!! I would send a mass text to all my kids letting them know they hurt their Dad. That should get their attention and let them take it from there. I bet he was extremely hurt even if he didn't mention it. 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 517
Registered: ‎03-21-2017

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

Actually, contrary to a lot of posters saying that you shouldn't mention it, I think you should.  I was thinking that I would want to be reminded in the event that I forgot.  If that is a problem with your stepchildren, and they really didn't forget, than too bad.  The relationship is already damaged.  At least, they would have the opportunity to send a belated card or call.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 31,160
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?


@PatriciaG wrote:

Actually, contrary to a lot of posters saying that you shouldn't mention it, I think you should.  I was thinking that I would want to be reminded in the event that I forgot.  If that is a problem with your stepchildren, and they really didn't forget, than too bad.  The relationship is already damaged.  At least, they would have the opportunity to send a belated card or call.


 

        She's been married to the man for 37 years so his adult children frpm his previous marriage are probably in their 40's and and perhaps  50's.  And there are 4 of them so it's impossbile that all 4 of them forgot their father's birthday.  It's just not possible.  She didn't tell us anything about the family dynamics but since her husband expected to hear from them, it seems like they were making a statement.  Something happened and OP,  her husband and the adult children know what that something is.  Her husband doesn't want her to interfere and she shouldn't.  The man's birthday is gone, there's no point in her making a bad situation worse.   Perhaps in the coming year the father can reach out to his adult children and repair his relationship with them or at least make things better.  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,491
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

I dated  a man whose grown children never called or returned calls unless they needed money.

 

When his birthday or father's day came around, I made sure we had fun plans for the entire day.  He only had a cell phone, so if they wanted to reach out, he would have gotten the message.

 

We can't control other people, we can only make the best of a good situation.

===================================
QVC Shopper - 1993

# IAMTEAMWEN
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,404
Registered: ‎02-22-2015

Re: Woulld you say anything to your stepchildren about this?

@elizabethl123  Belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! 

Money screams; wealth whispers.