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06-24-2022 07:13 AM
First thought is no I would not. However, a lot depends on the person's situation. I think women who have been left with a good income and has a lot of family and friends to spend time with might not feel the need. However if you have little family or maybe struggling to make ends meet a marriage may help you financially, socially and emotionally. However you could just live together... Also if you are older there is a good chance you will be his caretaker or he will be yours. I would not remarry however without having a serious money plan. I would not want to be thrown out in the street by his children. It is definitely more complicated later in life.
06-24-2022 07:16 AM
@Mom2Dogs Not the questions a typical 12 year old child would be asking....sounds like a mother's influence and her concerns.
06-24-2022 08:39 AM
@PuppyLoverBob666 Although I love my husband dearly, if after 53 yrs. of mariage, if he were left alone, of course I'd want HIM to remarry, if only for companionship.
Me? I think if widowed, I might remarry, but it would never be the same love I have for my DH. I know it would be just to have company.
As far as the "second wife" having my things, I've given the important/inherited jewelry to my family already and the rest (that I still wear) is listed who gets what...not supposed to be included in the will.
After I'm gone, I won't know if my jewelry, clothing, antiques go to whom I intended, so it really doesn't matter to me.
06-24-2022 08:58 AM
No! Marriage is wonderful, but no, I would not. I can't see it.
06-24-2022 09:34 AM
I am a widow, but I still feel married to my husband. So no, I don't even think about the possibility. I don't have the energy for other things, let alone another man.
But I wouldn't mind being friends with a good handyman.🛠🪚
06-24-2022 09:51 AM
I don't mean this comment to be snarky at all. Not in the least.
But sometimes, I think it's easy to armchair quarterback when you're not in the football game.
My husband was 12 1/2 years older than me. And he had a major health issue. Odds were he was going to pass away before me. We both knew that. I thought no way would I want to marry again. Nope, I've got the best (and I sure did, I adored my husband and miss him terribly). And after he died I didn't think there was any remote possibility that I would want to be in another relationship. Couldn't even fathom it. No way.
Heck, I was a child when JFK was killed and I couldn't understand, even then, why Jackie remarried. But I get it now.
Until it happens to you, you just don't know.
I am 66. I do not have children. I have 2 stepsons in their 50's who really don't bother with me. My sister lives 45 minutes away and still works full time. I don't want her to feel like she needs to spend all her time with me on her weekends off. My best friends don't live local. One is 2 hours away and the other lives out west. I have a very small circle of friends here and they have their own lives. I am appreciative of the time we spend together, but it isn't much. My husband has one nephew left and he is ill and housebound so no interaction there though I do keep in touch with his wife.
I am hopeful that the plan is for me to live many more years. I really hope so. I am a good human being, a kind person. I don't show it here, but I am pretty witty and I love to be around people.
Again, I am only 66 years old. Just speaking for me personally, as much as I love my new house, I don't want to sit here alone in my recliner and finish out my life that way. I want to be with people and I feel I have a lot to offer to a relationship. I don't really even care about future marriage. I would be fine with a committed relationship.
So again, until you're faced with the situation, it's hard to say how you'd feel.
06-24-2022 09:58 AM
This is such a sad thread.
06-24-2022 10:03 AM
@Tinkrbl44 wrote:
@CatsyCline wrote:A co-worker once said she only took out enough life insurance to cover her funeral expenses. (her children were long married and on their own
.
She didnt want her husband living large remarried to a younger 2nd wife.
no i personally would not remarry . no no no !
Wow! Talk about a control freak .... trying to control her husband from her grave? I hope she was making a joke.
I'm sure she was.
Someone scolded me for the use of the term "hussy" which I meant in a light-hearted (but true) way. I DON'T want anyone getting their hands on MY "stuff"--mostly money which I plan to leave to some indigent relatives, but also a few things I'd like to leave to my granddaughtter.
Some people are really ready and willing to take offense.
06-24-2022 10:07 AM
No. I love my DH very much, but marriage is hard. I would miss the love and companionship, but it's just too much to think of doing it all over again.
06-24-2022 10:11 AM
"Today my hubby and I have been married for 43 years. We were to go to a strawberry fest tonight but not feeling well (can't shake the virus of the century) we decided not to go. He went for a ride on his motorcycle and came home with my favorite chinese food and all the fixings for strawberry shortcake, he's at the kitchen island cutting the strawberries as I type. He's very thoughtful like that and still makes me laugh as he phoned while out and asked if i'd like some flowers and I said no thanks. He said chuckling, "remember it's the thought that counts".
I would not remarry again,as others have stated why when you've had the best already."
wow! Are you sure we aren't married to the same man? because my husband is just like yours. I, too, feel I've got the best and no one else could measure up (or put up with me--I had some really nasty medical issues and that's put an "edge" on my personality).
Congratulations, I and hope you have more years together.
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