Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,124
Registered: ‎12-02-2013

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?



As several posters have said: don't let it ruin your weekend as life is too short.


It doesn't matter why they do this miserable stuff:  it's a choice they make for whatever reason.  You are the victim. Become victorious by making a choice to not give over to them any of your time, energy ( physical or mental ), good spirit. 


I have been been there many times over a long career in different types of environments and industries.  


One of the most satisfying incidents occurred as I was leaving one company to start my own firm.  I was taken to lunch by the woman who had back stabbed me.  After we were seated, I told her I understood why she had done what she did and that I forgave her and wished her luck.



We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.
Sir Winston Churchill
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,360
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

While I don't believe that women should just willy nilly support all women, I do believe that every person regardless of male or female deserves to have their opinions and beliefs treated with respect.  I am not naive and have seen this vicuious aggressive behavior of some women against other women, and feel there is no place for this anywhere.  However, just because a person is female doesn't mean I am bound believe in the same principals and share values and opinions with her but I make every effort to try not to offend or insult anyone for any reason. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 24,333
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Actually it occurs in many species.  Anyone who knows dogs, knows there can be nothing more vicious than two females that don't get along.  They're much nastier than two males are likely to be.  With the girls, it seems to be a power thing, jealously driven. 

New Mexico☀️Land Of Enchantment
Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,733
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

I think it's pretty much a few very rudimentary reasons - 


Some are very competitive.


Some feel bad about themselves and the only way they know to feel better about themselves (in their minds, anyway) is to try and take down others.  I've known a few like that.  They never could or would excel, either due to inability, lack of education, or just plain were lazy people who won't want to put in the effort, and just want to get by on the backs of others.  For whatever reason, they felt that it behooved them to tear down those around them and that put them, again in their minds, in a higher position.


Some people are just plain mean.  They take great glee in being mean to others because they are socially inept.  Perhaps they were bullied as children, or just were always a bully themselves.  Either way, they just do't know how to act.  Smiley Happy

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,464
Registered: ‎01-03-2012

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Goldengate8361 wrote:

I don't get it! Women should support other women, but some women are incredibly vicious, back-stabbing, and malicious to other women at work. I experinced this today and I'm having a really hard time shaking it off. (1) have others of you seen this in the workplace---and (2) what's your theory about why this happens?  this is the only way I have to help me to let go of the people that want to hurt me in life. 

Super Contributor
Posts: 433
Registered: ‎09-12-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Because usually they want to be noticed and are trying to get to the top of the heap. Many companies recognize only a few women who are going to get the promotions - and some of those women think that being hard-nosed against their competition will get them noticed. You didn't mention what the "vicious" behavior was, so it's hard to say what it's all about.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,463
Registered: ‎01-18-2012

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

I originally trained to be an economist - then turned to nursing - then after a lot of years went back and joined an International Economists Div at large Uni in Palo Alto CA.  Loved the job, loved my Boss Lady - another lady in our team too - she and I became good buddies, met each other's families, dined, etc. 


One day Boss Lady called me in talked about work, etc. then she hit me with words referring to your good friend be careful as every opportunity she gets she is putting you and your work down to me (the Boss) and anyone else.  Her next statement - which I will never forget was - she is putting a knife in your back!  She went on to say I think you should be aware of this.     Luckily my work was good but I was totally devastated - considered her my closest friend.

It did really upset me and I feel for OP as it is an awful feeling.  Karma really does work as 6 mos later she was let go but I still feel upset when I think about this.  I worked there until I retired as did my Boss on the same day.


I wonder why women do this each other.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,019
Registered: ‎06-21-2015

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

This isn't just in the work place. My daughter aways telling me who there are always other females causing  c**p with her. I didn't  really believe her. I thought why would anybody do that. Well I was at the Dr office with her and there were  some girls probably in Thier 20's giving her some seriously dirty looks. I asked her if she knew them and she said no. So I  believe her now.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 653
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

I had a day like this yesterday a matter of fact. Most of my jobs have been in an office environment and have seen this behavior among women over and over. Most of my experiences that I've learned is many of "these vicious types of women" bring their frustrations and anger to the workplace (because of situations or events that actually occur outside the office, for example, their marriages or financial) and, for whatever reason they themselves only know, feel they can lash out at other women especially if they feel you are not going to come back at them. Oh, and if you they feel you have something they wish they had like a certain job skill or personal situation, that's whole other story. That little green monster rears its ugly head once again. I HATE dealing with this nonsense. I wish everyone would just go to work and do what they get paid to do. Leave your baggage in the elevator in the morning and pick up your baggage in the elevator on your way down at the end of the day. Hugs to you and I hope you can relax and enjoy your weekend! Smiley Happy
Valued Contributor
Posts: 533
Registered: ‎08-20-2012

Re: Why are some women so vicious to other women at work?

Sadly this has always happened. I think we all experience it.Some more than others. To hurt someone else is the last thing I want to do. My Mom used to say it takes all kinds.

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