Among Friends

[MarieIG]

Either don't answer the call; or keep the conversations short.

[Lucky Charm]

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@sissel wrote:

DD sumed it up said she is unhappy her adult kids don't work, she has bad marriage focus on me said Mom retired & happy she will never have it so she complains  She wants you to be in her in her level. Many times no answer the phone, on phone with her i am upbeat she hates it DD  says she wants depression to pull you down

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You're proving my point.

[stargazergal]

Yes........ I did what was right for my inner peace.  I blocked her number. Without going into great lengths.  I did it for her to force herself to look within herself for answers ..... its a long story...... but long story short....... it was the right thing to do for both of us.  I wish you the very best.   Remember .... your inner peace is important too.

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@sissel wrote:

I have a friend our girls were in cheerleaders in high school I moved to another state 14yrs ago haven't seen them girls grew up went to different colleges my DD works at job 8yrs her DD seems to have problems not liking to work, ok so 14yrs pass the mom calls me once a month what is you DD doing she got engaged no wedding plans or anything I ask questions here & there very nice seems after she wants to know my life & DD life she gets off the phone, her marriage is always a mess, no one works she is on medicaid I feel bad but she harps mostly on my life. why call me? she is upset my DH & I are retired & doing fine. We saved our money to retire, she was a spender but so focus on me why? I will never see her again why call me? She admits to me she is jealous of her friends that have a happy marriage. We really have nothing in common anymore live different states. She asks me so many questions about my life & DD life why? focus on your life, it's non stop questions life a job interview but worse. I try to avoid just laugh or say something funny, the friendship is over move on. I have friends (real ones) over 20yrs no problem. I never call her think she would figure it out. Do you know people like this? I do not answer many times she calls. 

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[ID2]

I'm not a fan of one person in the friendship ending it. Not nice when you don't even answer your friends calls. She has the right to know whats going on! If you want to end your friendship then give her the opportunity to hear your input. A friendship is a two way street. Not a fair split when the other friend is kept in the dark. 

[SunSprite]

@sissel  My apologies if I missed the update, but did you find someone to help you with the stitches in your mouth? I was hoping you were able to get that resolved.

[GoneButNotForgotten]

sometimes a friendship just runs it course. It sounds like she's having a hard time letting go. If I were in this situation, I'd just avoide any contact with her until she gets the message. That may sound harsh but if someone is so persistent, that's about the only way to handle it.

[stargazergal]

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@ID2 wrote:

I'm not a fan of one person in the friendship ending it. Not nice when you don't even answer your friends calls. She has the right to know whats going on! If you want to end your friendship then give her the opportunity to hear your input. A friendship is a two way street. Not a fair split when the other friend is kept in the dark. 

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In my situation...... it was a friend in Highschool I'd not been in contact with for 

over 30 Years.   I made it a point way back then to end the friendship because 

her friendship back then was emotionally draining .   She sought me out 30

years later........ she showed up at my doorstep......Unannounced !!!

It was a shocker to me.   Not at all ready for the visit,  we went to dinner 

and she dumped on me ALL about her bad marriage, her children, extended 

family ., people at her work........ too much to go into , but still the very same

insecurities I had witnessed when we hung out togethers over 30 years ago.

I gave her my honest advice...... to get counseling.   I felt the same draining 

feeling I had felt years and years ago being in her presence.   To protect 

my inner peace........ I did what was right for me........ years ago.  After a few

phone calls from her, and giving her what I thought was solid advice,

Listening over and over to the same comments....... I did again what was 

best for both of us.    Inner Peace for me....... and forcing herself to 

evaluate what she can do for herself........ to look within herself for the 

answers.   

Nothing changes........... if nothing changes.