When a relative keeps insulting

hyacinth003 · ‎03-12-2010

At least, I consider it insulting! I have never said anything to her regarding the NUMEROUS times she keeps saying it.

She is not technically a relative anymore as she has gotten divorced from the actual relative - she is an in law. I have tried to be a friend to her during the divorce.

She keeps referring to a financial situation as "small." It is well into 6 figures, which I do not consider small. She considers herself very "upscale," and uses the word a lot. Anything she has is from her former marriage. She thinks of herself very highly and sometimes incorrectly! But, I just listen for the most part. I think she got a raw deal being divorced, so I tried to be a support. She just said AGAIN yesterday that the issue was "small," and I am really sick of it. She seems to do it EVERY time she can.

Would you ignore it or say something to a person like this?

Hyacinth

dex · ‎03-09-2010

I would probably say ..who you trying to kid that's huge!I would just make small jokes about the small talk.

GenXmuse · ‎05-15-2016

She's referring to her financial issue as small? Not yours?

Scooby Doo · ‎03-14-2010

There's nothing positive that will come of it if you say anything. It's not your problem and not your money, so I would just continue to be a good listener. Maybe she's saying "small" to you to make you think it doesn't hurt her. But inside it stings. Otherwise she wouldn't continue talking about it

ECBG · ‎01-08-2011

I would say something like "I know, but it is "what it is". "Lets.....

Repetition is like slowly being beaten to death!

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

If she's referring to her own divorce settlement, why do you care if she refers to it as small. Perhaps to her it was small, especially if she believes she was entitled to more. What is that this woman is supposedly insulting? It doesn't appear she's insulting you in any way. Strange....

nana59 · ‎05-12-2012

If she's not technically a relative any longer, I would distance myself. You don't need to listen to her--it's not doing either of you any good. She'll find someone else to listen to her.....I've finally reached the stage of my life where I put myself first...I regret that it's taken me 66 years....hope I get to live the rest of my years in peace.

hyacinth003 · ‎03-12-2010

@chrystaltree wrote:
If she's referring to her own divorce settlement, why do you care if she refers to it as small. Perhaps to her it was small, especially if she believes she was entitled to more. What is that this woman is supposedly insulting? It doesn't appear she's insulting you in any way. Strange....

Not strange.

It is not her divorce settlement she is referring to. I don't care what she says about that. I actually thought she didn't get ENOUGH in her divorce settlement. She kept saying that she had the best lawyers, however I thought she should have gotten more. I figure there is no point in making her feel worse about it.

No, she is referring to a gift that I got. She keeps saying "well, it was such a small ______ . I said it was 6 figures, which I don't consider small! She seems obsessed with her being more "upscale" than others. She has no education or career. Has not earned money on her own. Yet, she thinks she is WAY above others.

She's been having health issues and I feel bad for her. She really doesn't have friends, and she lost family in divorce. I have been very supportive to her because she's really on her own. I have nothing to gain by being a friend to her. What is it - no good deed goes unpunished???

Hyacinth

hyacinth003 · ‎03-12-2010

@Bonanzajellybean wrote:
She's referring to her financial issue as small? Not yours?

No, it's mine! I'm sorry she knows about it.

Hyacinth

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@hyacinth003 wrote:
At least, I consider it insulting! I have never said anything to her regarding the NUMEROUS times she keeps saying it.

She is not technically a relative anymore as she has gotten divorced from the actual relative - she is an in law. I have tried to be a friend to her during the divorce.

She keeps referring to a financial situation as "small." It is well into 6 figures, which I do not consider small. She considers herself very "upscale," and uses the word a lot. Anything she has is from her former marriage. She thinks of herself very highly and sometimes incorrectly! But, I just listen for the most part. I think she got a raw deal being divorced, so I tried to be a support. She just said AGAIN yesterday that the issue was "small," and I am really sick of it. She seems to do it EVERY time she can.

Would you ignore it or say something to a person like this?

Hyacinth

Why do you continue being friends with her if you don't like her? I'd just move on and stop the relationship gently. Be busy.