Among Friends

[GCR18]

I would look for an announcement in the paper, to confirm.  Then I'd mail a card to the house.  The next time I saw her, I'd stop her to talk.  Sorry to hear about your loss, if you need anything DH and I are just across the street. 

[KingstonsMom]

Since you're only able to assume what may have happened, say nothing until you know the facts, such as an obituary, etc.

When my brother committed suicide, we were inundated by neighbors who saw the emergency vehicles and most just wanted to know what happened, for curiosity sake.

They didn't know us or him well enough for it to be genuine concern and we finally had to unplug the phone and doorbell.

We had enough to deal with, our grief, our not understanding why, to relive it over and over and over and over......

JMO

[StephaniM]

Yes, you should acknowledge the situation.  Just a card and a small plant, ask offer to attend to her pets,  she’ll appreciate it

[Kitlynn]

It isn't the words you speak or what you do that matters it is the fact that you say something or do something acknowledging that you care for what she is going through. I would get a simple card and take a dish over. Even something like some nice cinnamon rolls from a bakery. Reaching out to someone in their time and showing compassion is what is really important.

[geezerette]

I just went through this myself.  My husband passed away suddenly just this past week in fact.  

I’ve had varying responses from neighbors, some known, some not.  Frankly, it didn’t matter to me what they did.  I’m numb right now.  But just having someone give their sympathy (I don’t need flowers, food or the like right now) is enough.  Also, the usual, “If there’s anything I can do” line surprisingly does help.  I probably will never call on most of these people for any type of help, but just the sentiment right now is comforting.

I find the little stories that people tell me about my husband are especially nice, even though they tend to make me cry.  In your case, since you didn’t know the husband, this wouldn’t apply.  If you don’t feel comfortable seeing the woman in person, send a card with a short note of sympathy.  It will be appreciated.

[cherry]

@geezerette  God rest his soul, and cover you with His love...

Spoiler

[SeaMaiden]

To everyone who shared their thoughts thank you so much.  You gave me such nice suggestions. Once I know what was going on for sure... and give the situation some time,  I will mail a card and perhaps  leave a plant or such on her door step. 

[KingstonsMom]

@geezerette

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Mom2Dogs]

@geezerette....so sorry for your loss.

[Sweet Caroline 1]

SeaMaiden,  I, like you, live in a neighborhood where everyone tends to keep to themselves.    I hope she doesn't move away.   I would leave a card or just a note on paper in her mailbox.   You could say somthing like.... my name is (name) and I live in the green house across the street from you.   We have spoken a few times to each other.   I want to reach out to you and let you know that I am here if you need me.   You are being a sweet neighbor.....