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Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,320
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

@Chrystaltree 

 

I don't know how to "highlight" the portion of your post about "learning" to be a good MIL to your SILs (i think you meant DIL) by the ways of your MIL.  

 

Me too I learned from mine what not to be!  There are no nice things to say so I'm 🤐🤐🤐🤐!  (Ps: spouse would agree).

 

FIL was a kind & gentlemen ...miss him everyday like my own father.  

 

 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 616
Registered: ‎03-04-2017

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

My father in law is a very sweet man. Hes very hard working and just recently retired. I do enjoy spending time w him and love intellectual discussions with him that i cant talk to about with anyone else. He's one to never bother anyone for anything and is humble. Mil really had me fooled. In the begining i thought she was just the sweetest mil and felt so lucky to have her. Now not so much, so much has happened to make me think otherwise. 

~No act of kindness, no matter how small is ever wasted~ Aesop
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Honored Contributor
Posts: 23,200
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

@homedecor1 

 

No I meant my Sons-in-law.   Men can have bad mother in laws too.  I have a lovely relationship with the men my girls married and I think it's because I remembered how my MIL behaved and I avoided those pit falls.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,320
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

@Chrystaltree 

 

oh boy the "moments" just keep coming .... sorry!  yup youre right!!!

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,625
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

As a MIL myself, I agree.


But, my MIL deserved hers!

"I've been here since October 2006. Wow!"
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,202
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

 i never heard a thing from my husbands nieces and nephews when my husband passed away 3 years ago. He always saw them when he went back to visit his family.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,852
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

@house_cat 

 

I have no living in-laws, but all of them were the best.

 

 

 

hckynut

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,642
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

I never met my FIL, but I had an amazing MIL. She died 5 months before my mom passed. It was horrible to lose them both. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,745
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Too often, in-laws get a bad rap.

Well in-law wise, it got off to a rocky start on both sides, and we eloped.

 

My in-laws did not approve of me because I was an American, as well as being a different religion.  They were very, very, vocal about it.  Standing in the street screaming vocal. (They subsequently arranged a marriage for my husband's brother, back in the old country.)

 

My parents did not approve of my husband because he was an immigrant - and obviously was just marrying me for a green card.  They were very tight-lipped and cold to him.

 

My husband was alway very respectful of my parents, was a hard worker, and went out of his way to be helpful to them, besides being a good husband and father.  My father thawed first, but his way of bonding was telling DH what to constantly.  DH had a lot to put up with. He was even good to my grandmother, tracking her down when she got lost, bringing her home, and patiently calming her down.  He spent a number of "night shifts" with my grandmother when she was in the hosptial. My huband's big heart eventually wore my parents down, and they came to love him very much. (My parents are gone now.)

 

Because my husband was so good to my parents, I was never disrespectful of his parents.  If anything needed to be said, he was the one to say it.  Eventually they were worn down as well, and came to love me. (I love them too.)  They are still very vocal, lol!

Do the math.