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Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

 


@PA Mom-mom wrote:

@KKJ wrote:

Recently a lady I know (she's not a close friend ) said to me  "Are you tired? You look really tired."  I mean, you might as well say, "you look like ******".  Women don't realize how rude this is.


@KKJ  When people tell me that, I'm pretty sure they mean it, and I'm pretty sure they're right! I have no illusions. I'm tired a lot.


But that's just it---I wasn't tired and still find it rude to say.

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

My snarky response to this question is  another question: "do you have a mirror?".

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

One of my good GF's told me a week ago that my hair looked cuter when it was shorter. 

 

I thought to myself meaning that it's not cute now? LOL

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

The only woman who made me cringe because of comments was my MIL.

 

One Thanksgiving she looked around the dining table (my house) and said to each one of her daughters and sons how beautiful or handsome they were. 

 

Then she looked at me and said *Lucky---you look tired*.  

 

I'd been up since 5 AM to make a perfect dinner in my immaculate house that I had decorated for Christmas up until midnite the night before.

 

I smiled and told her I think I was coming down with something and had a fever over 100* as I picked up a tray of bread/rolls and coughed on them as I took them to the kitchen.

 

Don't worry, I threw them out to the birds.

 

Once I took the priest who baptized me to lunch and when I picked him up, the first words out of his mouth was *Lucky!  You used to be thin!*  Oy.

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

I had an old man tell me that I was looking old.I was 30.i guess he was a pedophile.i thought he was so rude especially since he was in his 70s at the time. I guess he didn’t think he had aged a bit.

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

I hear, boy you are sick alot. And my response is Duh! Ya think. The person knows I have CFS/ Fibro.

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults


@Sandy Sparkles wrote:

I am guilty of having told someone I knew they "looked tired" when I thought they did. I never thought it was offensive, as it was not intended that way, but after reading the posts here, I doubt that I ever will again. I really had no idea it could be interpreted that way, and feel bad when I think it might have been. I will be much more sensitive in the future and as my mother used to say, "keep your words to yourself".😁

 

 

All we need is LOVE💖


@Sandy Sparkles OMG!!!  I just said that to someone at work!!!  I was concerned she looked so bad.  I guess I shouldn't have been concerned!!!!!

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults

If someone says to me, and they have, "You look tired" NEVER in my wildest dreams would I be offended or think they were saying it to be mean.

 

I think it means I look tired.  It makes me think I need some rest, or maybe need to take some down time.  I just figure hey, I look tired. 

 

And usually they are spot on.  OR it is my allergies, and I'll laugh and say "No, it's my allergies" (which also make me tired).

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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults


@Nananana59 wrote:

someone i hadn't seen in awhile said that to me yesterday......i deal with chronic pain,,,didn't need to hear that....


@Nananana59 ...I hear you loud and clear.  I too suffer with chronic pain and it does wear people down.  I don't know what it is like to sleep through the night because of the pain, even with pain medication.  I'm sorry you have to live with it too, bless you.

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam
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Re: Things women say to each other they don't realize are insults


@kitcat51 wrote:

The people who ask care about me...I don't think it's rude.

 


@kitcat51   I'm on the fence with this one. While people who do ask care about how you feel, certainly there's a more tactful way to ask instead of equating it to how you look.