Prayers and good thoughts, please. - Page 2

golding76 · ‎05-19-2012

sfnative, my prayers and best wishes are with you. God bless you and protect you as you go forward.

Take all precautions.

Not that this holds a candle to what you have recently experienced, but today I was in the presence of someone -- a stranger -- who erupted in a public place, and I was frightened to death. It has been years since I felt such fear. This individual allowed his anger toward a service person to escalate to the point that he would have harmed her if he could have. It was unbelievable.

This strip mall is in a very nice neighborhood, I might add. It came out that this individual said he had traveled two hours to get to the mall.

I left the premises and spoke with a security person at the strip mall who was going to check on the venue and also call the non-911 police number for further advice. He did not carry a firearm.

I was trembling for two hours afterward. Fearing harm from a loved one is an unacceptable way to live. No one should live under such a shroud of fear.

Good luck to you!

proudlyfromNJ · ‎05-01-2010

I am so sorry to hear this. It sounds like a very scary situation, especially with all the firearms. Having your daughter and sil nearby will be a big help. Best wishes and prayers for you.

mom2four0418 · ‎04-23-2010

Please seek the advice of a domestic law attorney as soon as possible. You need an experienced professional to guide you through the process while helping you to remain safe and protect your assets.

“The soul is healed by being with children.”
— Fyodor Dostoyevsky

sfnative · ‎03-10-2010

@kivah

I grew up in a home like yours, except my mother was the awful, horrible, beat-me-up one and my Dad super passive. Am glad you and your Mother got away to some peace. I bet you miss her.

proudlyfromNJ · ‎05-01-2010

@mom2four wrote:

Please seek the advice of a domestic law attorney as soon as possible. You need an experienced professional to guide you through the process while helping you to remain safe and protect your assets.

I agree with this 100%.

mzlg · ‎04-28-2011

@sfnative, you have so far, received some good suggestions - Safety first, attorney and yes, get all the financial information you can, etc.

~

You are in my prayers for your safety, strength, peace of mind and happiness with your family

dex · ‎03-09-2010

@sfnative stuff doesn't matter..

you do.He can ditch your stuff but that can all be replaced.Take things that you can't replace but just forget about the rest.I am praying that this goes smoothly for you and your daughter and her family.

sfnative · ‎03-10-2010

@golding76 wrote:
sfnative, my prayers and best wishes are with you. God bless you and protect you as you go forward.

Take all precautions.

Not that this holds a candle to what you have recently experienced, but today I was in the presence of someone -- a stranger -- who erupted in a public place, and I was frightened to death. It has been years since I felt such fear. This individual allowed his anger toward a service person to escalate to the point that he would have harmed her if he could have. It was unbelievable.

This strip mall is in a very nice neighborhood, I might add. It came out that this individual said he had traveled two hours to get to the mall.

I left the premises and spoke with a security person at the strip mall who was going to check on the venue and also call the non-911 police number for further advice. He did not carry a firearm.

I was trembling for two hours afterward. Fearing harm from a loved one is an unacceptable way to live. No one should live under such a shroud of fear.

Good luck to you!

@golding76

I understand the fear and aftereffects you experienced.

We retired 3 years ago and my husband took one week to come up here to our new city to find a house we could rent before buying. It wasn't until then (3 years ago) that I realized how much that man had me in knots, as during the entire week he was gone, I don't think I'd ever felt better and more relaxed in my life.

I need to get into that space again, so I can live out what's left of my life in peace. Thank you for sharing your experience. I would have been scared as well.

golding76 · ‎05-19-2012

sfnative, since I have written about my first marriage and the horrific disaster it was on this board before, I think I should tell you that I had to leave an abusive husband. Although we were married briefly (six months) when I knew I had to divorce this mad man, we had gone together for seven years. So, it isn't as though I wasn't emotionally invested in him.

He was a tyrant, was cruel, and physically and emotionally abusive. The night he pulled a knife on me was the night that I sneaked out while he fell asleep with the knife beside him. I had the good fortune of having a great-aunt and cousin living on Wisconsin Ave. in D.C. because my husband and I lived in Glover Park, which was a couple blocks from my great-aunt in Georgetown. On an icy night, I slipped out with just a housedress and loafers on -- no socks, no coat, no nothing because I did not want to wake him up.

No one should live in fear.

Ultimately, we ended up leaving one another in an amicable fashion, but I had to separate from him. I knew if I stayed with him, I would end up crazy or dead. Decided to suffer through the break-up and shame of divorce (it was 1969; we were on the leading edge of the divorce wave). It wasn't easy but I knew I could not thrive with him.

sfnative · ‎03-10-2010

@dex wrote:
@sfnative stuff doesn't matter..
you do.He can ditch your stuff but that can all be replaced.Take things that you can't replace but just forget about the rest.I am praying that this goes smoothly for you and your daughter and her family.

@dex

I understand what you're staying and believe me, if I need to fly out the door, I will.

However, my mother ditched my stuff years ago and my husband caused me to loose all of my furniture and related furnishing when he sold one of our homes - to the new owners without discussing the matter with me. Also, he's already been ditching my belonging into the trash or donating them to Goodwill without my permission, some of it of sentimental value and I simply do not want this person to get away with it yet again. Clearly, he's also a control freak. I don't want to be controlled, if I can avoid it. But I also need to be safe. Beleive be when I say that I will tread lightly here.