Among Friends

[chessylady]

Hold your head high and accept the things you cannot change. I would not discuss your decision any further with your daughter. Send a nice floral arrangement with a note that you cannot attend due to your husband's declining health but that your sympathy is with the family.You might include your remembrances of your niece.

[Sweet Caroline 1]

@Vivian     Dear Viv, I'm finding your post late, on 7-6-20.  I was married to an abusive man for 17 years.  You have a marriage that has lasted.  How blessed you are to have a beautiful husband and he is in your care.  A beautiful wife to him.  How perfect.  You are a wonderful inspiration and role model for other marriages.  You are blessed.  God bless you and your husband, Love, SC 

[Twins Mom]

@Vivian 

I truly hope you can rest comfortably and assured of your decision.  Please find comfort in the fact that you are doing the best you can as well as doing the most good for your family under these trying circumstances.  Bless your brother for being able to think clearly .  Bless you in your daily efforts.  (I find the comments by other posters very thoughtful and sensible.  Hope they bring you strength.)

[Vivian]

i must thank you all again for your wise and supportive words. I have found a car service that will take my husband and me door-to-door to my brother's house, and back again. We will probably visit within a couple of weeks, after my husband's cancer check-up on 7/14. My brother and sister-in-law are fine with that. It's all that matters to me.

[haddon9]

@Vivian You have my deepest condolences.  I am so sorry for your loss and all that you are going through. 

Rather than criticize you, your daughter should be helping and visiting her father.  I'm sorry that she's making things worse. 

[depglass]

Tell your daughter to leave you alone.  Frankly I'm shocked at her attitude.  You are doing what is right for your particular situation.  Is no one concerned about the virus?  

[Boomernichols]

@Vivian I am so sorry for the predicament that you are currently dealing with.  Your daughter should be ashamed of herself for not visiting her father, excuse me for saying so.  You have a heavy cross to carry before you earn your crown.  I will lift you up in prayer for comfort and strength in this difficult time.

[jubilant]

So sorry for your loss. It's always so sad when someone takes their own life. You say your brother understands your dilemna.  That should help you in your decision.

Our children sometimes don't understand a lot of things we do.  We can't let that be the law of our life....... anymore then they would let us be the law of their lives.  Consider what they have to say, weigh it all out....  then make your decision based on what you think is the best thing to do.  There are times in your life when you are da#!ed if you do and da#!ed if you don't. 

I'm saying prayers for the whole family.  We went through something similar on Christmas Day and I know how heart wrenching it can be.

[Tinkerbell3]

Not only do you have your hands full but, we are in the middle of a pandemic! STAY HOME and don't apologize to anyone! I am so sorry for your loss  ):

[Vivian]

So now, to literally add insult to injury, I tripped over a defective air cleaner in our den and landed on my head. Fortunately, nothing serious occurred but I have a hideous shiner that is spreading from one eye, down my cheek into the other eye; nothing hurts but I look awful. I must recover within ten days in order for my 98 year old mother not to have a stroke when seeing me when I visit her in less than two weeks. I have stress on top of stress.