Among Friends

[jannabelle1]

I'm a little late to the conversation, but I think you handled the situation perfectly - especially not answering the door. I have a feeling he's carried around some guilt for a lot of years about the way he treated you and your marriage. My ex did something similar not too long after our divorce (we were married for 22 years). He called and wanted to bring some papers over that he said needed my signature. I agreed, but after looking at the papers realized he didn't really need my signature at all. He used it as an excuse and just wanted to see how I was doing and where I was living after I sold our home - the cad! I think your ex knows full well that after all these years, you have no use for your wedding album.

[emmysmom]

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@jannabelle1 wrote:

I'm a little late to the conversation, but I think you handled the situation perfectly - especially not answering the door. I have a feeling he's carried around some guilt for a lot of years about the way he treated you and your marriage. My ex did something similar not too long after our divorce (we were married for 22 years). He called and wanted to bring some papers over that he said needed my signature. I agreed, but after looking at the papers realized he didn't really need my signature at all. He used it as an excuse and just wanted to see how I was doing and where I was living after I sold our home - the cad! I think your ex knows full well that after all these years, you have no use for your wedding album.

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(I was married 22 years to my second husband..thats a long time!)

I feel the same about my ex...after all these years...wedding pics, really??? I also think he was curious about how I looked...where I lived..etc! I hope he feels some guilt..but highly doubtful. He was a very arrogant and selfish guy..I can see that now! Thanks jannabelle, I'm doing good now. Thanks to you and others that posted..!!!!! xxx

[lovesrecess]

I would not respond to him in any way... leopards don't change their spots....be careful.

[Ifeelwicked]

He came by for one reason. Is there any way you would want the album? You seem to have done just fine without it. Don’t waste your time on painful memories. I’m so sorry for you that he even came by. Men don’t think sometimes, and we women tend to overthink. Call your most fun friend, go have a nice dinner, and toast the good times ahead!🍷😊🌷 (Or get your hair done and go shoe shopping. That works, too! 😉)

[emmysmom]

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@Ifeelwicked wrote:

He came by for one reason. Is there any way you would want the album? You seem to have done just fine without it. Don’t waste your time on painful memories. I’m so sorry for you that he even came by. Men don’t think sometimes, and we women tend to overthink. Call your most fun friend, go have a nice dinner, and toast the good times ahead!🍷😊🌷 (Or get your hair done and go shoe shopping. That works, too! 😉)

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Sounds perfect!!!!!!!! Thanks! 

[emmysmom]

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@lovesrecess wrote:
I would not respond to him in any way... leopards don't change their spots....be careful.

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Exactly..one of my fav scriptures! 

[lovesrecess]

It sounds like many of us have terrible experiences with an ex (including me!) I am glad everyone has been able to offer smart advice based on firsthand experience.

[lovesrecess]

We may not know his motive for bringing the photos.....and we don't know OP's feelings either....she knows best.

[Rockycoast]

I would not respond at all to your ex. He is an ex for a reason! He is already causing you pain and you haven't even seen him!  As stated by another poster,  A leopard doesn't change its' spots. Don't give him an opportunity to hurt you again. You are done with him let it stay that way.

[Sooner]

Obviously he is after something . . .