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Honored Contributor
Posts: 29,051
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: My Grand daughter's School Mate Committed Suicide Last week

@Ko  I have had several members of my family commit suicide in various ways.

 

When I was a kid my Uncle did it with a shotgun.  I still remember what a scar it left in our family.

 

He was older and as we've always said, "A good 'country boy'".  I never heard why he did it.  Back then (when I was a kid) people didn't talk much about things like that (not around kids anyway).

 

My oldest sister I lived with from 13 years old until I got married at 19 was taking very, very strong medicine for a disease she had.  She knew so much about medicine we all said she could have been a pharmaist.  She just stopped taking the medicine, went into renal failure and was gone in a short time.

 

My sister I mentioned above had a son.  A few years after she died he killed himself.  That was especially hard on our family.  No one had any idea.  It was sudden.  He left a note for his brother (he was on 20 years old) but I never knew what the note said.

 

My daughter is watching my granddaughter to see how she deals with this.  I think they knew 'of' each other but weren't close friends.

 

This same daughter had a baby that died two weeks after he was born.  She's familiar with counseling and knows how much it can help people.  She and her husband went to counseling after he (the baby died).

 

I heard that often it's something that a person does at the spur of the moment.  The program I watched said often it isn't planned out but quickly acted upon.

 

I'm having dinner with them tomorrow but I will only bring it up if my granddaughter does.  It's none of my business and I'm sure my daughter (her mother) is handling it.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,396
Registered: ‎07-11-2010

Re: My Grand daughter's School Mate Committed Suicide Last week

Sorry your grandaughter is carrying this burden without close touch with friends.  Any of us who have been touched by suicide truly understand the difficulty....just imagine this "separation" only makes it more difficult to manage!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,203
Registered: ‎07-19-2013

Re: My Grand daughter's School Mate Committed Suicide Last week

@annabellethecat 

 

Oh my goodness, how awful, the amount of pain your family has endured, really more than imaginable.

I'm sorry and have no valuable words of comfort. 

It seems your family has had so much of this, and the experience is one you unfortunately are familiar with how to navigate through.

God Bless you all.

 

Ko

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,314
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: My Grand daughter's School Mate Committed Suicide Last week

Painful to say the least. I don't want to see school age kids get Covid, but the kids I know want to get back in school. They want things to return to normal and are willing to do what is necessary. As for me, I'd gladly give up gym class if everything else could have continued on😇.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 29,051
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: My Grand daughter's School Mate Committed Suicide Last week

@Ko I have a large extended family.  I think every family has experienced trama and grief....not a lot different from mine.

 

I can't imagine the pain that family is feeling. Such a young person.  It's so sad.

 

These kids that go to magnet schools are the highest achievers.  They are goal oriented.  

 

I know my granddaughters really well.  Ever since she and her sister were very young (now her sister will be 18 in August and she'll be 16 I believe it is)  I can't keep track of their ages (I have 7 grandchildren).  

 

Up until the virus hit the three of us would go shopping in book stores, lunch, makeup stores, shoe stores.  We'd spend hours together.

 

We'd get drive-in food and sit in my car and eat it and talk.  The rule is you can tell Grandma anything and as long as it's nothing that would hurt them....it goes no far than the car.  They trust me and my word.

 

I posted that about the suicide because those are the kind of kids who desperately want to get back in school.  My grandson told me he just wants to reconnect with his friends and play basketball again.  

 

 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,709
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: My Grand daughter's School Mate Committed Suicide Last week

Your granddaughter needs to talk to a counselor.  There are so many feelings and things going on in her head that she'll never tell you or her parents.

 

When I was in 4th grade (early 60s), a classmate hung himself.  I still think about him to this day.  It's not a morbid thought or anything, but just a thought.  But it was scary when I was so young.