My Dad's service today

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Re: My Dad's service today

‎09-13-2019 09:46 AM

@hyacinth003 wrote:
We held my father's services today. My brother and sister-in-law scheduled the date and time without consulting me. They purchased Mass cards without consulting me. Then they find out I am the sole executor of his estate. My sister-in-law interpreted the will as my brother was a co-executor. And anything given to my brother is really given to her, as he isn't interested and she runs the show. She is furious since I called the attorney to check on the wording of his will and revocable living trust. She called me and screamed at me without explanation and demanded I pick up any papers of my dad she had in her possession. My daughter went quickly and picked them up. Since then, not one word from her. My biggest source of stress has been the date they picked for the Mass. It was done so my sister-in-law could go to their Florida condo tomorrow. Looks like she now cannot due to work requirements. My brother has been civil.

The service (which I had to coordinate) was lovely, flowers delivered, cremains present in a beautiful wooden urn I chose (my brother said do what you want), my daughter gave the eulogy, and I did readings (my brother didn't want to. I had the Marine honor guard present, and my brother let me get the flag presented. I didn't demand that.

My sister-in-law IGNORED ME the whole time. I was prepared to talk to her. She also ignored my daughter and husband (what did they do?). Not only in the chapel but in the restaurant afterward. She told a friend of hers to keep having more drinks because she wasn't paying for it. I had thought after a week she would have mellowed. I didn't write the will, I have tried to include my brother in everything, and she ignores me!

Hyacinth

So sorry for the loss of your Dad @hyacinth003 . It sounds like the services were beautiful and you did a wonderful job planning it and you did your Dad proud. Your sister in law has issues that you need to ignore. She sounds like she’s controlling, unhappy and selfish. Negative people are definitely not welcome in my life. Tolerate her for your brother’s sake. I’m sure he knows her personality traits and won’t be shocked if you become cold towards her.