Menapause and Marriage - Page 2

kaydee50 · ‎02-07-2011

IMO, it's more of a midlife crisis than just a physical change in the woman. Not that uncommon in people in their 40s and 50s.

Also I don't think any of the posters were "rude." They were expressing an opinion that the OP should not be upset or surprised because she doesn't know all the facts.

KingstonsMom · ‎03-09-2010

@LoveMyBaby wrote:
@newname0

Menopause can be a really tough time in a woman's life. Very tough life cycle to get through. I feel for your godchild.

Please Ignore the right-out-of-the gate nasty responses ( I also like to take note of who 'hearts' their posts).

LOL! Is that supposed to be a threat of some kind?

I'll raise my hand right now, I hearted the post that said it was really none of her business why her godchild's marriage is dissolving, because I personally don't think it is her business.

If her godchild wanted her to be privy to 'why', she would have discussed it with her.

You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

phoenixbrd · ‎03-27-2010

@newname0 You can't really know what happens in relationships. I wish that your goddaughter had conversations with you when facing challenges in her marriage. I'm sorry, divorce is rarely a happy situation. Maybe you would want to call or have lunch with your GD just to establish some support. She might welcome your friendship during this difficult time.

software · ‎06-08-2016

@LoveMyBaby wrote:
@Still Raining wrote:
Menopause is NOT the end of all. Many of have done just fine with our relations. MYOB, the sky is not falling.
RUDE

How does one get appointed to the RUDE police?

Is there any training? A badge?

Your post is RUDE

qbetzforreal · ‎08-28-2010

@newname0 wrote:
I learned from my cousin recently that her 52 year old daughter, my godchild, had separated from her husband. This was a shock to me as I felt that she had a good marriage.

Her husband was a Marine and I met him only once and from that I figured he was quite tough.

I myself think that her husband doesn't understand menapause which I believe my godchild is experiencing right now. Her mother, my cousin, has been divorced two times and is really not a good marriage role model for her.

i'm sad that this marriage has been broken. I saw his Facebook page and he is into motorcycles, dogs and Marine stuff. He does have many pictures on there of his children but not any of my godchild.

What I'm trying to get to is that I think these younger people don't know how to handle midlife issues. Their children have left the nest and only one younger girl remains in high school.

I think these younger people are not understanding of the changes that come with menapause and are confused in their feelings.

Some couples decide to split once the children are grown, they stay together for the sake of children. The real reason why your godchild separated from her husband is unknown. You won't know the real reason unless you ask her. I doubt seriously it's because of menopause which you are guessing she's going through.

Pook · ‎03-20-2010

I also think MYOB is called for and not as rude as butting into other's lives. To speculate it is menopause and the husband's fault is bizarre!! If I were to speculate I would say based on the pictures OP mentioned the couple probably had little in common since she was never in the pictures (although she may have been the one taking them) and as the kids got older they just decided that neither was happy in the marriage and no longer wanted to live that way. How the OP zeroed in on menopause as even figuring into the split at all is a mystery. 52 is not considered a younger person. If I were to speculate further I would think that women who think like the OP used menopause to keep their men in line. Sure menopause is often a huge change but nothing to use as an excuse to blame everything on my SO and have him cater to me!! Plus since I no longer had the monthly inconvenience and chance of pregnancy we got much closer.

BlueFinch · ‎08-31-2019

@newname0 If menopause could so easily destroy a marriage, we sure would be seeing a marriage crisis in midlife. The courthouses would be overrun.

When unconditional love exists, it can survive situations 100 times more disrupting to the relationship than menopause.

By your own admission, you only met your godchild's husband ONE time. This makes it clear that you really didn't know him, nor were you able to observe the chemistry between the couple. If so, you may have seen signs of problems long ago.

I get that you're concerned, but you don't know the facts. The best you can do is be a good ear for your godchild, if, and when, she may want to share her feelings. She may never want to, content to just move on with her life. If so, let her and don't push.

newname0 · ‎06-20-2015

Actually I called my cousin because she hadn't sent me a card for Christmas and I thought she was ill. It was then that she told me she lost her alimony from her second husband and was now living in a rental house with my godchild. I was surprised and asked why that was so and she told me that my godchild and her husband were separated; She couldn't talk further because their son was home from the Marines and was within earshot.

I thought about calling her back to get the full explanation but felt I would be considered nosy so I didn't. I have no close contact with my godchild to have lunch with her so all I have done is speculation.

Janey2 · ‎06-07-2010

I do not think anyone was rude. Jumping to conclusions and deciding on why people do things is so prevalent these days it is almost a past time. Get the facts before you come to any type of conclusion.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

@newname0 wrote:

Actually I called my cousin because she hadn't sent me a card for Christmas and I thought she was ill. It was then that she told me she lost her alimony from her second husband and was now living in a rental house with my godchild. I was surprised and asked why that was so and she told me that my godchild and her husband were separated; She couldn't talk further because their son was home from the Marines and was within earshot.

I thought about calling her back to get the full explanation but felt I would be considered nosy so I didn't. I have no close contact with my godchild to have lunch with her so all I have done is speculation.

Gossip, you thought about calling her back to get the down and dirty juicy gossip of the woman's personal business. I would like to think that the woman's mother would not have endulged you in that way. Yes, it's speculation on your part and it's an awful thing. Although, I have to admit. Most people would not be so open about it as you are. You seem to feel that you are entitled to know someone else's private information. Someone you admit, you have no relationship with.