Among Friends

[qvcaddition]

@BoopOMatic 

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@BoopOMatic wrote:

@Black Cat Back  Hey TennisBuf, please don't feel you're all alone in the world! I am reading this thread and I'm sure lots of others are, too, and are concerned and care about you.

 I would like to encourage you and @qvcaddition  to join the other forum, where there is private messaging - I know she said she tried and couldn't, but it's worth another try.

 All you have to do is google Q forum friends, and it will go right to it.

 No I'm not a moderator over there or anything, I just know how handy and easy it is to keep up with people if you can do private messaging.

 The two of you could exchange phone numbers or whatever. I'm not going to make an actual link, as they removed it before and I don't want to get in trouble, but googling that phrase will take you there.

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Thank you for caring.  I will try again and maybe get tennisbuf  to try.

[qvcaddition]

@Black Cat Back 

Do you want to google Q forum friends?  I finally found it.  Google it and see if you want to talk on there instead of here, it,s private and maybe some one on there can help you find a rental.  

If you do want to switch, let me know and I will follow you.

I finally had a non stressful day.  Got everything settled about cable.  Now waiting for the gov to approve my application.  If approved, my cable gets a 30.00 credit every month.  I am way below the level of income they alloe.

Sorry you are low again. It,s not that I am stronger.  I have had more experience because I am probably much older.  I use to feel like you do, but it not only drove people away,  but I wasn,t getting anywhere.  

I do understand where you are coming from.  Each person has to find their own strength.  

At least you are trying.  You can,t give up.  I don,t understand why these people say they will help you and don,t follow through.

Could the RE lady be busy  because of Thanksgiving.  

Call her back, get an answer.

Yesterday when the Comcast office would not help me,   it bothered me, so I got on the phone and kept calling until I got someone.  Problem was solved.

Has it only been a day or two since she told you?  Give her time. 

You can,t give up.  I realize it,s discouraging, but giving up is not the answer.

I wish I could help you not be depressed.  All I can say is, there are people who have it so much worse.

Not that your life is not important,  but  there are people in much worst  situations.

I miss Thanksgiving of years past, but can,t get them back.  I miss them very much.  I am so sorry for you .  Can you take yourself to a movie?

I have done this  in a Christmas Day being a!one.  

I wanted to go to bed and forget the world, but how would that help?

Feeling the way you do, can you get a therapist on the phone. 

You mentioned some man therapist.

Please get in touch with someone.

Maybe the forum boopOMatic mentioned has people there that have suggestions. Let me know what you want to do.  Love.

Love you.  Please stay safe.

[qvcaddition]

@BoopOMatic 

I found it and need to register, but need to think about it.

I will see if tennisbuf wants to do it.  I don,t want to leave her alone if she doesn,t want to register.  

I did figure how to get on there with your instructions. Thank you.

[Black Cat Back]

@qvcaddition 

Sorry it took me so long to respond.  Just got a late start today and had so much to do late in the day.   I had a bad day.  I won't apologize for it as it's just the way I am feeling.   It's just hard when you feel bombarded by so much.   I just need a rest in my life when things aren't coming at me like tennis balls one after the other.   I'm tired and just want to remember what peace and joy feel like.   Haven't had those in many years.

I do know others may have it worse.  I'm not closed hearted.  But any mtn we climb is ten times harder alone.   People make it through in life because they have support and love.   Without it, without human contact, without love, life is harder no matter what the circumstances.  I also was diagnosed with PTSD after my work experience with  my boss from he!!.   So that gets in the way a lot of times.  I haven't explained what happened, and won't here.  But she caused me a lot of mental and emotional grief.  She was also bigoted and treated me differently than everyone else in my dept.  When someone has your job in their hands, it's a very stressful situation.   That period in my life took a lot out of me and derailed me for a long time.  I thought when she left, I'd be on the mend.. but then other things in life hit me.  I just want to come up for air.  I do have a therapist, but he's only there every 2 weeks.  It's not the same as family or people in your life.  He listens, but isn't the most dynamic of health professionals.  For some reason, I never can find the EAP person who empowers me.

I'll try the website this week.  If it works, that would be nice.  I just hope it's a secure site or my anti-virus won't allow it.  I have an old Windows 7 operating system on my old computer, and I have to be careful of viruses.

But, if it works, it would be a nice way to connect.

Glad you had a better day.  Thank you for being patient with me.  I am trying really hard to find the strength to move forward.  Coming from a place of emotional abuse, I'm slowly trying to find me again.

Take good care... Love and Hugs..

@BoopOMatic 

Thank you kindly for your suggestion and words of kindness.

[qvcaddition]

@Black Cat Back 

I really am sorry for what you are going through  now and in the past.

The other site might have some  person that has answers or has  gone through some of your experiences and can help.  I  have, i just handle it different.  I at least have a couple of people that care, but alone on the holidays are still rough.

I did start to register on the other site,  but I didn,t like putting in my actual email and a few personal  information, so I have to think about doing so.

BoopOMatic I think is also alone and it may help you to connect on that site will her.  

Check on the site.  It might be the answer to talk to a few people there  that can help you feel better, or at least not alone.

Again, I,m so sorry . 

I,m not going into it here why I sued the company. but similar to what you went through.  

At least check out the other site and you may find many new acquaintances and have more people in your circle to speak with you, beside just me.  

Let me know what you think.  

Ask, BoopOMatic if it is safe from viruses. She may be able to help explain it to you.

Please take care. Love and hugs.

[Black Cat Back]

@qvcaddition 

I hope I haven't been a pain in the butt.   I don't mean to be such a drama queen or too much.   I hope we can still converse.   I apologize if I load you with too much.

I just haven't had anyone to talk to for so long.  

I appreciate all your kindness and support.   Sorry if I'm too much.

Take care.  Love & hugs.

[qvcaddition]

@Black Cat Back 

Of course we can still converse.   I just wish I can help you. Did you check out the private site that BoopOMatic suggested?  

There may be other people on there just as lonely.  She feels it,s private.

You just go on Google, type in Q forum friends.  It will ask for your email.  Then you create a user name and password.

This way it,s private, where here it,s open for everyone to read.

She said to you, there are a lot of lonely people.

If you want to stay on here, that,s ok .

I don,t mind listening, just wish I can help.

I,ve given a lot of suggestions and they don,t help you.

I had some problems like you and no one could help me. I turned to God.

I know you work and that keeps you busy.  Have you thought about volunteering either at an animal shelter a couple of hours on the weekend?

you know animals are comforting. Or in a hospital, helping people?  

these are just suggestions.  At least you would be helping someone and people to speak with.  Again, just suggestions.

Before covid, I was volunteering at an art gallery, Kaiser and the gardens.  I had people to speak with all the time and made some acquaintances.

We are all different, but it would get you  out and you may connect with another person for coffee, or lunch.

Would  something like that work for you?   You spoke about some man you know.  What about inviting him for a dinner Thanksgiving or helping to serve food at a shelter.  I,m thinking of doing that for Christmas.

I will be here to listen.  Ok. Take care and hugs.

[Black Cat Back]

@qvcaddition 

I'll think about checking the other site out.  I'm not sure if I want to give my email address out.  I'm already bombarded by emails I have no idea how I got them.

Right now, I cannot commit to volunteering.   I have to concentrate on finding a place to live and cleaning up my stuff where I currently live.

I did serve every Thanksgiving for 6 or more years at the Salvation Army. When Covid hit, I stopped.  I drive a 31 year old car and don't feel like driving downtown Phx on a holiday should something happen with my car.  I did meet people then, but the ones I did didn't stay in touch.

The man I was talking about is married with a family.  I am an old friend.  Better he should invite me to join his family.  

All good suggestions, thanks... I'll go that direction once I know what my future living situation is and I can have free time to do things for enjoyment.

I hope today finds you well.  I'm tired as I am working this week. 

Take good care... Love and hugs

[qvcaddition]

@Black Cat Back 

I understand.  I also get a lot of emails.  Companies can look you up.  I had 90 today. I just scan the title and delete all of them at once. I do keep the ones I need.  Once you google, they track you. I get QVC advertisements on the side of my emails. Things I looked at on the Q.

Qvc has our email, I thought about that. To sign on here you have to put your email in and password. So that won't be any different.

BoopOMatic wanted to join us, but not on here, because it's not private and I'm sure she would join us on there.  Plus other lonely people.  

Think about it, you would have more people to talk with beside just me.

I will stay on here with you if that's what you decide.

I mistook, I thought that man was single. Yes it would be nice if they invited you.

I went to costco again today and it was packed. Just wanted to get a few items and get out of there.  People don't look where they are going with their baskets. Anyway, I froze the items I picked up. Bread, muffins, veg. fruit and my downfall, popcorn.

I was going to make a cornish hen for Thanksgiving and stuffing, but decided to have a fruit salad and one of their huge muffins, a pumpkin one.  

That was special of you to serve at the SA for 6 years. It must have made you feel good. 

My son did invite me to his house, he is not going to my daughters, because his wife had surgery, so her kid is going over with his kids. I don't feel like going. So he said he would bring me a plate Friday. He is a very good son

It's 40 miles round trip and gas too expensive and like you my car is 23 years old. It's broken down twice in the last 2 years.

Got a new alternator and a new radiator.  I should have brought a newer car when I had the money, but didn't want car payments.

Funny, the young kids come up to me and even a few men and ask if i wanted to sell the car. It's a 1997 ford thunderbird.

I use waterless stuff from HSN to keep it clean and it works beautifully.  Shines where you can see your face in it.

I understand about not volunteering.

I met some nice women when I volunteered at the gardens and one in particular that was a QVC nut, and we had that and a lot of other things in common, but she died about 3 years ago.  I had just spoken with her two night before on the phone and we were going to meet for lunch in a couple days, but didn't set a time.  Called and called her and the last call, told her if she didn't answer, I was going to her house.

A male picked up the phone and said, my Mother died two nights ago. 

I was able to give the eulogy at her memorial, which was held at the gardens. What a shocker.  

Well, am tired now myself. Time to go watch TV and fall asleep on the couch.  Melanie already asleep.

I hope you get the day after Thanksgiving off, that will give you four days to rest or take care of things. 

Have a good day tomorrow  Sending hugs and prayers to you.

[Black Cat Back]

@qvcaddition 

We are a lot alike.  We both have older cars (I love not having car payments and still use a key to get in mine).  My 1992 Subaru has been a dream car.  I've had to put a lot of money into it, but it has really run nicely most of the time.  I go Monday for a tune-up.  Always makes me nervous, but I trust my long time mechanic.   I get compliments on my car too.  I've always tried to keep it up and looking clean.  People are shocked at its age and condition.  There are a few more dings and scrapes, but that's understandable after all these years.

I love popcorn too.  I sometimes eat it for dinner.  I love to munch on it and it's good for you.  I'll mix low salt microwave with fresh popped in my little Presto Air Popper, for a nice balance.  Sometimes I'll melt a little butter and put it over it (just a little).   When I'm nervous watching football, I go through a few bowls.

That man wanted over $2700 for a month rent at that place near me.  I'm so disappointed.  Good luck mister getting it.  I thanked him for getting back to me but told him it was out of my budget but keep me in mind if it changes.  It would have to change a lot for me to afford. it.  He's a fool.  He may get something close to it with lousy tenants.  I come with references he knows and longevity in the complex.  Some people are just too greedy.

Pumpkin muffin sounds good.   I don't have a Costco membership but heard it's fun shopping there.   I make vegan zucchini cranberry muffins. They have no eggs.  I'm not vegan, but these were easy to make and they are very good.  Weird how you can't even taste the zucchini.

Not sure what I'll eat tomorrow.  I saw a recipe for ground turkey meatballs.  That sounded interesting. Wonder if it's sacreligious to buy ground turkey on Thanksgiving.  LOL!   I make a homemade pizza with easy crust (it's not the best crust ever, but it works and is easy).  I load it with mushrooms, black olives, onions and red peppers and cheeses.  Maybe watch football and have my pizza and a salad.  Since I can't do much tomorrow (although it's a good day to go to the store, it's never busy) I'm going to "try" to relax and watch football, maybe some DVR'd movies, etc.  I just have to take a break from my worries.   Sad it will be the last Thanksgiving here.   It's not really a big holiday anymore.  It makes me sad to walk and watch neighbors with families and people coming with food.  I feel very lonely on these holidays.  Bet no one will even call me.

The new real estate agent is very nice.  She totally gets my worry and she is proactive and looks for things and calls the other agents about seeing if their rent price could be negotiable.  She is the best one I've had so far.  People tell me to go on Craig's list, etc.  But I feel better with MLS listings and a real estate agent advocating for me.  I've heard there are alot of scams out there.   We'll see. So far she's been very nice.

Thanks again for being there for me and checking in.  I do give QVC my email, but they are a big business.  I'm just not sure about that website.  It's not a part of a business that stands behind its safety measures.  Will see.  Boop-o-Matic will have to convince me it's all okay.

Take care... I do have Friday off thank goodness.  I need to sleep in.  It was busy these past two days. I've had to back-up another person.  No one backs me up... so unfair.  But, I did more of her work than mine.

Hug Melanie for me and will check in tomorrow.  Enjoy your muffin and fruit whenever you eat.  I usually eat holiday meals for dinner not lunch.  That's how my family did it.

Take care.. Love and hugs. Thank you for your prayers.