LIVING ALONE - EMPTY NEXT

qvc chick · ‎03-10-2010

I am currently in a single family home, my adult son lives with me, but he is moving out next month. My daugher has her own place a few miles away.

I am not sure how I feel about living alone. Benn divorced for many years, and now with my son moving, will be all alone, except for my dogs.

Feeling a little sad, and probably will be lonely. Have alot of friends, but all of a sudden, the empty rooms/no noise, scare me.

Any tips?

KingstonsMom · ‎03-09-2010

Try to keep yourself busy!

With hobbies, friends, volunteering with something close to your heart, take your dogs to dog parks/walks, etc.

Empty Nest Syndrome is very real and I think that adjusting to the 'quiet' was the hardest part for me.

Spending more time 'out & about' helped me a lot!

You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

2blonde · ‎03-10-2010

@qvc chick Hey, it's understandable that you'd feel that way after having other people in the house for so many years. Trust me, you'll get used to it, and after awhile you'll like having complete control of your surroundings, and being totally in charge. In the meantime, try to find some outside activities that get you out of the house. That way, you learn to appreciate coming home, even though it's empty. Remember, you'll always have your "best friends" waiting for you when you get there!

Laura loves cats!

Mactective · ‎04-07-2015

EMBRACE IT! Do all the things you haven't been able to do up until now! Eat when you want and what you want without worrying about what your son wants. Dance around the house wiht the music turned up loud. Wear what you want around the house - or nothing at all! Paint the whole house PINK! (or any other color you want.)

Seriously - you have to make a "new" sort of life for yourself now. Stay connected to friends and if you don't have any - make some. Join a club or two so you can stay social. If you are active in church, invite some other single ladies out to dinner or a movie with you. Develop some hobbies. Join a book club, walking club, coffee club - or start one!

If you start feeling bad, do something good for other people. Volunteer some time or talent to people that are not doing as well as you are and you will feel better immediately.

Lastly, do some things to make yourself feel safe at night so you can sleep well. Get a dog or a new alarm system or take other security measures so you don't feel vulnerable in your own home.

Remember: This isn't a sad or lonely time in your life - it's just a new chapter and you can make of it what you want.

Vivian · ‎03-11-2010

My oldest daughter was in a relationship for two years, with a man who was much older but treated her like a princess. She broke up with him last month because she said the age difference negatively affected their relationship. She feels terribly guilty because he was so kind, but she could not accept his proposal of marriage. She feels terribly guilty because he was so kind and helpful but her feelings must be acknowledged. I feel sorry for both of them.

alliswell · ‎07-12-2012

@Mactective wrote:
EMBRACE IT! Do all the things you haven't been able to do up until now! Eat when you want and what you want without worrying about what your son wants. Dance around the house wiht the music turned up loud. Wear what you want around the house - or nothing at all! Paint the whole house PINK! (or any other color you want.)

Seriously - you have to make a "new" sort of life for yourself now. Stay connected to friends and if you don't have any - make some. Join a club or two so you can stay social. If you are active in church, invite some other single ladies out to dinner or a movie with you. Develop some hobbies. Join a book club, walking club, coffee club - or start one!

If you start feeling bad, do something good for other people. Volunteer some time or talent to people that are not doing as well as you are and you will feel better immediately.

Lastly, do some things to make yourself feel safe at night so you can sleep well. Get a dog or a new alarm system or take other security measures so you don't feel vulnerable in your own home.

Remember: This isn't a sad or lonely time in your life - it's just a new chapter and you can make of it what you want.

Image result for count your blessings meme

jackthebear · ‎03-11-2010

@Vivian wrote:
My oldest daughter was in a relationship for two years, with a man who was much older but treated her like a princess. She broke up with him last month because she said the age difference negatively affected their relationship. She feels terribly guilty because he was so kind, but she could not accept his proposal of marriage. She feels terribly guilty because he was so kind and helpful but her feelings must be acknowledged. I feel sorry for both of them.

that' is too bad but guilt is never the right emotion here, guilt is for bad or immoral things and what she did is neither.

123SuzyQ123 · ‎03-09-2010

I have been completely alone in my house for 4 years now. I came from a large family, but ended up with my own small family, so the first few years of being completely alone were tough on me.

I've chosen not to have pets, because the loss of 5 beloved doggies was too hard on me, and I won't put myself through that hurt again!

At first, I was scared at night, until I started "safeproofing" areas of my house that I thought someone could break in through.

I try to enjoy that I can watch whatever TV programs I want, eat or not eat at certain times, etc.

Good luck to you in this new phase of your life, OP. With your family living close by, you can see them often. All my family lives either 125 miles, or 1600 miles from me!!! But I do wish you the best, you can keep us up to date on how things are going with you!!

ScarletDove · ‎07-11-2010

@Vivian wrote:
My oldest daughter was in a relationship for two years, with a man who was much older but treated her like a princess. She broke up with him last month because she said the age difference negatively affected their relationship. She feels terribly guilty because he was so kind, but she could not accept his proposal of marriage. She feels terribly guilty because he was so kind and helpful but her feelings must be acknowledged. I feel sorry for both of them.

@Vivian Your daughter made a choice due to guilt and now she will have to live with the guilt of her choice!