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Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,861
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

Yes. On Monday when I have to take Mom for an appointment with her RA doctor.
~ house cat ~
Honored Contributor
Posts: 21,075
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

You explained your reasons for saying "no" at this time and if she is a "big girl" she should be able to accept that.  Assuming she will return later the same way would it be possible for her to stop by on her way home?  Feelings are delicate and I certainly would not want you to risk your friendship with your friend (her mother) in NY so maybe you could arrange another time for her daughter.  Would this be within the realm of possibility? 

"Faith, Hope, Love; the greatest of these is Love." ~The Silver Fox~
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,475
Registered: ‎03-14-2015

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

[ Edited ]

I'll never understand why women feel guilty for saying "No". Do you think guys feel guilty, or fret when they say "No"? Of course they don't! So why should women? Why women feel as though that they have to please everybody, or risk "disappointing" them, is beyond me. So what if they are disappointed? That is their problem, not yours.

 

Saying, "No" is very empowering. It says that YOUR needs matter and come FIRST.

 

Women need to get over this silly notion that if they say "No", someone is going to be upset. So what if they are? That's their problem to deal with, not yours.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,536
Registered: ‎05-27-2014

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

I know I'm pretty new here but my .002 is of COURSE you may decline a visit from a family member or even a friend.

 

I think a rereading of Emily Post should be made mandatory for every citizen. Social graces, heck, even basic respect for someone is passe.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,579
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

Of course it is perfectly okay to decline visitors.

 

I always say we would love to see you, except at this time due to a private family matter a visit is not possible, but in future we are sure it would be, and hope you will understand.

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,861
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

I think the following update should fall under the heading of IRONY.

 

I called the daughter this morning to ask if perhaps she could switch the dates a bit and drive back on Sunday, rather than Monday.  I'd be happy to see her on Sunday.  As it turns out, the person she was going to stay with in San Diego called to tell her that it really wasn't a good weekend for her to visit. 

 

Anyway, we chatted for a while and there don't seem to be any hard feelings.

 

The moral of this story... be true to yourself.

~ house cat ~
Honored Contributor
Posts: 41,469
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?


@house_cat wrote:

 

 

The moral of this story... be true to yourself.


 

AMEN :-)

There are many elements: wind, fire, water
But none quite like the element of surprise
Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,179
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

YES!

 

Do not feel guilty!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,813
Registered: ‎05-29-2015

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?

A distant relative of mine named Polonius once said:

 

"To thine own self be true

and it must follow as the night the day,

thou canst not then be false to any man."

 

I'm glad it all worked out!

~~~ I call dibs on the popcorn concession!! ~~~
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,527
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Is it okay to decline visitors?


@house_cat wrote:

I think the following update should fall under the heading of IRONY.

 

I called the daughter this morning to ask if perhaps she could switch the dates a bit and drive back on Sunday, rather than Monday.  I'd be happy to see her on Sunday.  As it turns out, the person she was going to stay with in San Diego called to tell her that it really wasn't a good weekend for her to visit. 

 

Anyway, we chatted for a while and there don't seem to be any hard feelings.

 

The moral of this story... be true to yourself.


Poor girl.  It sounds like nobody wants to see her!  (kidding!)

 

When she does come thru your area again, I don't think you need to host her at your house.  She wants to see YOU.  Meeting for a coffee or meal would accomplish that.

*********************
Keepin' it real.