Among Friends

[ECBG]

Having a friend who is a psychiatrist, and my history being a teacher, we have had a full discussion on entitlement and I believe I know where some has come from, which, of course is debatable.

What would you have done OTHER than stepped back?:  Today I went to my allergy doctor's walk in clinic for the allergy shot I have pushed up to the time limit. 

As I approached from one side, an 8 yr old little girl approached with her grandmother from the opposite side.  The girl ran to get in front of me and ran to get into line in front of me. (I was just waiting to see how this young ladie's rudeness of running in front of me would be handled.)  When the girl was about to go up to the receptionist, the grandmother said to me

"Would you mind if I go up there with my granddaughter?"!!!  I couldn't believe it!  I would have called the child to me and said "We don't run ahead of people.  Stand with me please.".

Eight years old is not a baby.  As this child is advancing, she will get older and will continue what she is doing-of course.

I feel that too often we step back when we should open the door to sensitivity.

[Kachina624]

The grandmother gave you the perfect opportunity to express yourself; what did you say? 

[Oznell]

The most loving thing that grandmother could have done for her granddaughter, ECBG, would have been to say exactly as you suggest-- a gentle reminder that we don't run in front of people.

The reason being, of course, that we must not act as though our wants are more important than those of others.  The little girl needs to learn that when we do that to others, we are saying to them "I count-- you don't". 

Daily living is so much more harmonious and affirming when children and adults observe simple civility!

[PurpleBunny]

I too would have made my child step back.

Then again, my child wouldn't have been running in the doctor's office, anyway. 

[Janey2]

I think the grandmother told the girl to run and get in line fast. That's how cynical I've become.

[dex]

@ECBG you said that you were running late.I try to allow extra time to avoid the rush.I would have asked the little girl if she would mind letting me go first just this once.

[ECBG]

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@Kachina624 wrote:

The grandmother gave you the perfect opportunity to express yourself; what did you say? 

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@Kachina624I don't make scenes and anything would have been that way.  Thanks.

[Kachina624]

@ECBG  It would all depend on how you say it.  I would use a non-accusatory tone, sort of grandmother to grandmother, perhaps relating to the energetic approach of the young. 

[lulu2]

When I was a child, I'm willing to bet when there was a line, my friends and I raced to be ahead.  Seriously you've never walked more quickly from a parking lot to get ahead in a restaurant line? How about a line at an amusement park?

This was a walk-in line.  I do not think this is where entitlement begins.

I was a high school teacher in a wealthy district for over 30 years and saw a lot of entitlement.  I would not have given the incident described a second thought. The child didn't bump into you or knock you out of way.

[rrpell]

Yes, I agree.   It reminds me of the time my husband and I went to dinner with another couple.  I was taught a good lesson that I will always remember.

A little girl,  in the booth behind us, kept kicking the bottom of her seat.  It was loud and very annoying but I was not going to say anything and create a scene. 

My friend waited about a minute and when no correction came from the adults,  she leaned over the back of the seat and directly addressed the little girl.  She smiled and said "I'm sure you are having a nice time at the restaurant and you probably don't realize I can feel your kicking, right under my seat."  My friend turned around and that was that.

The little girl stopped kicking and we enjoyed our dinner with little confrontation.  My friend was correct to make sure the child knew her behavior was affecting someone else.