Among Friends

[Daysdee]

Many of my friends (in their 80's) are moving in with their kids after selling their home or having one of their grown children moving in with them.  None of these situations seem to be working out well as told to me by the older parent.  One bit of advice based on what I have heard--don't be hasty in selling your home.  You can't go back if the move doesn't work out.  Have a friend that really regrets her move.  She wishes she would have tried it out a few weeks (or more) before she got rid of her belongings and sold her home.  Just food for thought.

[Mom2Dogs]

I have no children, so that would not be an option...but unless it was absolutely necessary, I would never entertain the thought.

Everyone, old and young are set in their ways and unless there is a mother in law suite...I can't see it working.  I would opt for in home care.

[CelticCrafter]

No!

I don't want her putting her life on hold to have to tend to us and like momtodogs said, each of us are too set in our ways.  We have ours and she has hers and they would not mix well.

[PA Mom-mom]

We plan on eventually living in a retirement home. If not that, we would make sure our long term healthcare insurance included in-home care. We would never want to burden our children, even though they would offer.

[blackhole99]

I would not be able to stay in my home alone if my husband died first, too much property and up keep for a woman.My son is not interested in the responsibility of our property and likes the freedom apartment living gives him. I would sell my home asap and move into an apartment or buy a condo closer to my son.

[pugvette74]

I don't think so. If in your 80's and can take care of yourself, down size. If you can't take care of yourself, better to have a medical facility. 

[OKPrincess]

We hope to live on our own as long as we can. Should have the money to have in-home assistance if needed. If we sell our home later down the road use the money for assisted living. But none of us know what tomorrow holds. This is the perfect case scenario.

[queendiva]

In my early 60s. Just decided to sell my house and move closer to DS amd DDIL.

They are fully supportive of the plan. They now live an hour's drive from me and her family is at least double that distance. For now we will be a mutual support system while continuing to live our own lives.

[tarsmom]

Let's just say I know first hand of this - not me but someone close to me.  It darn near ruined the relationship for good.  Not a good idea at all unless all parties are even tempered and laid back. 

[moon_gazer]

NEVER, NEVER, NEVER would I even think about moving in with my son and imposing on him. He already has his mother-in-law living with him and she is perfectly capable of living on her own (65 years old). She moved in with him and his wife 2 months after they married (her daughter invited her without even discussing it first wit my son) and it was supposed to only be for a couple of years until she retired and then would move in with her very elderly mother who lived alone. Well, that has been 8 years ago and she is still living with my son and her daughter. My son is on the verge of leaving wife, step-daughter, and MIL! 

If I become unable to take care of myself, I will just go into assisted living or a nursing home.