Among Friends

[PamfromCT]

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@Sage04 wrote:

Growing up, people always did this to my Mom and now it's been done to me. I don't mind. I listen. This is both men and women. Some one said I have a very kind face lol.

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@Sage04, What a wonderful thing to have someone tell you that you have a kind face.

I remember an older man coming up to me at a large event.  He introduced himself and said he had to tell me that I had a kind face.  This has never left me, as kindness is so important to me.  I do stand up for myself and can express strong opinions, but I never want to attack a person’s core unless it is an extreme situation.  Personally, I think unkind people are very desperately unhappy and find contentment in striking out at others.

[SoCal Bred]

@PamfromCT .....Wrote:   kindness is so important to me.  I do stand up for myself and can express strong opinions, but I never want to attack a person’s core unless it is an extreme situation.  Personally, I think unkind people are very desperately unhappy and find contentment in striking out at others.

Well said, I couldn't agree with you more!

[Shanus]

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@ECBG wrote:

I'm guessing you must have a kind demeanor.  Some people are just easier to relate to.  Others pick up on a welcoming personality.

Also, many people have had quite a bit of stress with all of the virus awareness, their ageing parents, their own ageing issues which are constantly bearing on their minds.

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I agree @ECBG. My friend fell last week and broke her knee cap...OUCH! She's now stuck home with a brace and crutches. She wants to talk about it  and how bored she is, etc. A good friend listens and commiserates....and visits bringing in groceries and casseroles for dinner,. 

[qualitygal]

When you meet them, do you say, "Hello, how are you?"

For some that would open aniy conversation...............

[qualitygal]

Oh John, that's so cool that others tell new people to look for John.  How nice!! @hckynut 

[SurferWife]

@mintedrose 

"It's all about me" is the general attitude today.  With family, you need to patiently endure.  With others, though, you just need to kindly listen, then graciously back out of the conversation.

I have a co-worker who likes to divulge every ****** detail of every ****** thing she goes through.  As an example, she can't just say "I'll be out this afternoon for a dental appointment."  She has to say, I have a dental appt. today to get a root canal, then start the procedure for implants.  In two weeks I have to go back to get my crown seated on tooth #14, then they are going to prep tooth #30.  Once those are done, I get to start my work for my Invisalign...YAY!"

EDITED TO ADD:  she then sends me & our boss pictures of her x-rays.

And it's abou then that I give the finger down the throat puke action.

[mintedrose]

@SurferWife  

Thats definitely TMI. I dont like to every little detail with people even if Ive know them for a while. I talk about general stuff and thats it. 

Another thing, this is for new people. Some wanna ask very personal questions right away. I met a lady last weekend who was quite chatty and asked me my age, marital status, my religion, nationality, if im a parent, where i live on and on. Isnt asking someone's age kinda rude. I answered her then of course but later thought about it and felt violated. She invaded my space.

I've noticed that some people are just very rough around the edges when it comes to socializing. I couldnt say anything then because she put me on the spot but I really wanna be able to just say NO to people like that. 

[77yangya]

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@mintedrose wrote:

Ive noticed this a lot. With my family and friends more so and even new people that I meet sometimes. People just wanna talk about their issues with me. Im not sure why. I know with fam and friends its usual and just got used to it. But sometimes even when meeting new people, most of the time women, they usually just wanna talk about stuff that they're dealing with. Why is that? 

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They're probably in some kind of trouble.  How bad?  They probably don't know that either and therein lies the issue.

[77yangya]

Sorry to post twice but....by the way....being that I lost my last friend, and we were close, I'd be thrilled to pieces if someone sat in my kitchen with me and told me they could not stand me.

I'd even welcome that..........so anyone talking about their issues would be fine with me. 

Funny how we take things for granted.................

[AngelPuppy1]

@mintedrose 

People pick up that you are open and a good listener.  I think so many people these days have been cloistered at home, not getting out much, and many don't have anyone much to talk to or who will take the time to listen to them.   Many are lonely and want a few minutes for someone just to see them and hear them.  You appear to have a warm and kind demeanor and this makes it easy for them to open up to you.