Re: I've been so down

Catiele · ‎08-20-2012

So sorry for you. I lost my youngest son in January. We will never get over it. Tragic accident. We picked a stone yesterday. I am a mess. This may sound strange but I want him back. Life is so difficult for us now. Oh what might have been. Please feel better..

Sushismom · ‎03-09-2010

I'm so very sorry for you and your family, Catiele. Your wanting back doesn't sound strange at all to me since I feel the same way.

I hope you, too, feel better soon. Take care.

LTT1 · ‎03-09-2010

@chrystaltree wrote:
I think you should consider some therapy. You hadn't been a couple in a decade and half and it sound like there was no contact between you so you are grieving "what could have been". You aren't grieving the loss of a loved one, that's an entirely different thing. It obviously was not a relationship that made you happy. You are at the point in your life where you regret "the road not taken"; second guessing past decisions. It could even be things other than the passing of that long time ago boyfriend. Sometimes, a few sessions with a therapists gives us some perspective.

@chrystaltree

We can count on you to “tell it like it is.”

This is excellent advice.❤️

~Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit~

sunala · ‎03-09-2010

@Sushismom wrote:
I have some good days, some not-so-good days, and some bad days.

My ex-boyfriend died in January of this year. We broke up after 4 years. Neither of us ever married. He was, after almost 40 years, - and still is - the love of my life. I often dreamed about us getting back together when we were old; little did I know he would never get the chance to grow old. He died a couple of weeks short of his 60th birthday. I miss him dearly.

I guess what I really need is to talk about him. He was a great boyfriend EXCEPT for the alcohol. He only drank weekends when he wasn't in school or working. But, eventually, that was enough. There was so much good about him. He rarely got mad at me. He cooked as I really didn't. He even helped me to clean up after he cooked.

We kept in touch for several years after we broke up. But we lost contact about 10-15 years ago. I didn't even know he died until almost 5 weeks later. I was looking for his address online and, instead, found his obituary. I was in shock. And now, I find myself crying over his loss and things that could have been. My heart is broken.

@Sushismom - I'm so sorry for your loss. I've discovered that even though years go by, the feelings of love we've held in our hearts for someone never really go away. You will always miss him, but you will feel better with time. Remember he will always be with you. May he rest easy.

"That's a great first pancake."
Lady Gaga, to Tony Bennett

qualitygal · ‎10-04-2010

You're going through a grieving period. Everyone does that in their own way and time.

Lilysmom · ‎03-09-2010

@Sushismom , I am sorry you are having such a difficult time. I understand that part of your mourning is a deep feeling of regret. Regret for what might have been and also for not having a second chance.

Grief is an individual thing and we all deal with it differently. I have a friend who had a bad breakup six years ago and she has never really gotten over it. I worry about her all the time. She spends all of her time looking in the rear view mirror. You know, when that happens, you miss can miss what is right in front of you.

I have encouraged her to get counselling and she has done that. I see improvement and I am so happy she made that choice.

I send you best wishes @Sushismom . I can feel your pain in your post. Please allow yourself time to grieve. If you find yourself stuck there, be good enough to yourself to get some help with it. Blessings to you. LM

suzyQ3 · ‎03-09-2010

Oh, @Sushismom , life is so cruel sometimes. It's good to vent.

~Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

pitdakota · ‎03-16-2010

Oh @Sushismom, I am so very sorry to hear this. Of course you are grieving. I wish you well and hope that each passing day brings you a little more peace and comfort. It is normal to have some bad days and then have a few days that are better. As you go through your grieving I hope you will eventually have a greater number of better days than bad ones, but the loss will always be with you. Sending thoughts and prayers your way.

* Freedom has a taste the protected will never know *

sunala · ‎03-09-2010

@Catiele wrote:
So sorry for you. I lost my youngest son in January. We will never get over it. Tragic accident. We picked a stone yesterday. I am a mess. This may sound strange but I want him back. Life is so difficult for us now. Oh what might have been. Please feel better..

@Catiele - I have no words except that I am so very sorry for your loss.

"That's a great first pancake."
Lady Gaga, to Tony Bennett

CalminHeart · ‎03-09-2010

I'm so sorry. It's rough when you lose someone you love.

I was with a man for 12 years and he died suddenly. It was rough and I think of him often.

There have been several traumas in my life and losing Mom was especially tough. I finally went to counseling last year. The therapist used EMDR therapy and it helped me so much. I was went for 6 months and it changed my life. Perhaps it's something that could help you too?