@FuzzyFace wrote:
...and I'm not quite sure what to do.
What I'm concerned about is that Fathers Day is just 6 days away and so far ourson--grown, married, and a father himself--hasn't said a word to his own father about it. Not a word. And I know, from unhappy experience, this means he hasn't thought about it, considered it, etc.
First of all, I don't know whether I should say something at all right now; it possible that it's just slipped his mind. Should I remind him? That's not really my job but ****** it, my husband has been the best father in the world to him, plus DH has been through a lot, medically and emotionally, lately--no need to give details; I think you get the idea.
I don't want to remind him but dammit my first concern is my husband. I would be furious at our son if he just plain forgets so I'm inclined to remind him despite my reluctance to remind him. (And if anfyone's going to remind him, it should be his wife, not his mother.)
If he DOES "forget" or neglects his father in any way, I would probably give him the ass-chewing of his life. Normally I would try not to interfere or get too het up, but I feel too strongly about this for just a mild chiding. DH has been a free babysitter, has changed his schedule completely to accomodate son not just for babysitting but for other things too.
In addition to that, he's had two sick/injured women on his hands (myself and my sister) to take care of for the last year, when sis got cancer and I was diagnosed with hepatitis. In addition I'm taking medication that makes me unsafe to drive. etc etc. so he has to run the both of us to medical appointments and starting next week, for physical therapy on the knee I nearly broke at the end of April. He'd do this for our son and/or daughter-in-law and especially our granddaughter. He hasn't been asked to do this--yet--but they know he'd drop everything for them if they needed it.
And what really riles me up is that I feel that there's some ingratitude going on. It's not blatant but I do feel they could offer to come over and visit when I'm not doing well--that kind of thing.
So, what would you do? My main concern is my husband. After all he's done for them, I would think he (my son) would call him once in a while, or drop by, etc. I really don't care if giving my son a rude awakening upsets him--what I don't want is for my husband to fell forgotten, angry, upset, etc.
I know exactly how you feel. I am furious at my younger brother because he never calls or inquires after my 95 year old mother unless he needs money. Then, after he has the money he is not as grateful as he should be and disappears again. On Mother's Day they (he, wife, 3 kids) dropped by flowers from the grocery store and left them on the front patio without even a card. They brought the flowers at a time that they knew we (me, my mother, and my other brother)would be at brunch so they wouldn't have to spend time with us.You can't make someone be appreciative if they just aren't. Instead of stressing, I would just list all the nice things his father has done and let him know that he better put on a big showing of Father's Day appreciation.
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