Among Friends

[BlueFinch]

Reading this thread made me remember cleaning out my closet years ago and taking bags of clothing to my hospital unit's donation room. 

We often had patients brought in off the street and issued gowns without clothing to change into. We had our share of homeless, too. On my unit, we urged patients to dress as soon as they could to boost their mood and get back into familiar routines.

I remember hesitating about donating a particular dress I had loved but worn rarely, but I let it go. It was a casual midi length linen blend dress, with an unusual design and print. A bohemian vibe. Some foliage and elephants in different poses. Sounds tacky, but it was well done, elevated casual. Have never seen anything like it since.

As fate would have it, one shift I walked in to see one of my patients walking toward me in the dress. I commented that I liked her dress and how pretty she looked in it. She happily volunteered she chose it from the donation room. The smile she had was priceless. Her confidence was blossoming, with the compliments. I'm sure my smile equaled hers. Of course, I never told her I had donated it. 

When we let go of things, we never know what joy (or need) they may play in someone else's life. So my motto now, as I'm downsizing, too, is to reflect for a moment on each item. I then  give it a wish to play a little magic for someone else, in remembrance of the joy one unusual dress accomplished. Then I pass it on.  

[JeanLouiseFinch]

Memories live in your hesrt and mind, not in an object, and the memories aren't going anywhere.  You'll always have them.  

We have been setting up for a garage sale the past couple of days.  I had no clue that DH had stowed away so much stuff for "maybe someday". There is so much, too much, excess to get rid of, even though we aren't downsizing for a move.  I'm happy to let this stuff go, to simplify our existence, and to reclaim some valuable storage space.  I'm even going to send my wedding dress off to an organization that makes burial clothes for stillborn babies,  There's no sense in hanging onto this stuff for "maybes" that never come to fruition.  I'm looking at it as us getting a headstart on eliminating stuff, to lessen the eventual job for our kids.  

[sarahpanda]

@stevieb ...Thank you for your advice - I printed it out and I'm going to tape it somewhere for my review as I continue the process of downsizing...thanks again.

[sarahpanda]

@gidgetgh   Thank you so much for your reply.  It is very touching - and meaningful...I'm printing your reply to have on hand, very helpful, in so many ways.  Thanks again !!

[sarahpanda]

@BlueFinch ...Your post was heartwarming, thanks for sharing.

[AngelPuppy1]

I am sorry!  It's hard!  Sort judiciously!  Once the stuff is gone, it's gone!  Put things in piles before you dispose of any of it.  Mark piles and boxes - Definitely needs to go, positively keep, will see if family members or friends want, donate, etc.  Then, leave them for a bit after you have a chance to re-think and go back and look again!

I moved a few years ago to a very small house with practically no storage space or extra room.  I still lament some of the things which I tossed or donated.

Just because someone else thinks some of your things are not necessary, doesn't make it so!  They are your things and only you know what the true meaning is of something!

I love clothing and hate to part with it --- but I would get rid of a lot of them to make room for other precious objects and memories.  You can always replace clothing but not these things!

[jubilant]

I have to admit, it is a hard thing to do. I had so much glasswear that mostly just set in a cupboard and sideboard.  Things that were Grandma's and Mom's. In today's world... being that everything is so casual, I barely used any of it. I did keep the glass deviled egg holders because I still use them.... but that's about it.

  Knowing that my kids don't want any of this helps to.  I don't want them to just throw it out so, for me, the Goodwill store can sell it to someone who would appreciate it all.  Also, especially since Mom passed away at 92 last December, I don't want to have to go through this ever again or put my kids through it either.  I said good-bye to a ton of things this year.  We did have a couple of neighbors that we gave some things to. They have helped us out a lot these past few years....and it made us feel good to do it. It did hurt to part with some things so I understand your feelings, but.... like some others have said....I still have the memories and, to a degree, more peace of mind knowing that it's done.  

[CalminHeart]

I recently cleaned out my basement, kitchen, and a spare room. I packed up the antiques and inherited items and donated the rest.  I also donated a ton of kitchen cookware/bakeware/small appliances that I rarely or never use. I smile every time I open a cabinet and there is space and organization instead of clutter. It feels great to get rid of all the stuff that really didn't matter. 

[geezerette]

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@SeaMaiden wrote:

How about old pictures.... albums of pictures that mean a lot to me...but there is no one to give them too....I guess they go into the trash.. I suppose a ceremony might be preformed of burning them rather than tossing the garbage.... seems sad though 

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@SeaMaiden 

If those old photos give you pleasure and you have room for them, keep them all!  Much of decluttering/downsizing is about ridding yourself of things that are worrisome or no longer have value in your life.  Clearly your photos are important to you.

Just be mindful that if you have no one to give them to, someone else may end up tossing them.  But in the meantime, you can enjoy them for as long as you want.  That's what matters.

[Hazelfaye]

Maybe much of our stuff is disposable, old clothes that don't fit or all those Tupperware containers we have been saving for years, the old hot dog cooker, and hamburger maker etc.... but pictures are our memories....when my mom died and I cleaned out her house I kept all her pictures, some of people in them I didn't even know but they were her memories so I kept them, that might be going to far but it isn't to far to keep our memories in pics or anything else that meant sooo very much to us......if our kids don't want to keep them when we pass that's up to them, but we are still here and they are special to us