Among Friends

[sarahpanda]

We are downsizing, unfortunately due to health reasons. I'm having to go through a treasure trove of MEMORIES of the last 50 years of my life.  It is heartbreaking to have to decide what goes,what doesn't....this 'stuff' is a collection of what's made up 'me'...sure  it's just 'stuff',  but it all still means something to me.  How do you look at what makes up the memories of your life and say ' I don't want you anymore'?  Heartbreaking, to say the least...sniff, sniff.

[Nonametoday]

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@sarahpanda wrote:

We are downsizing, unfortunately due to health reasons. I'm having to go through a treasure trove of MEMORIES of the last 50 years of my life.  It is heartbreaking to have to decide what goes,what doesn't....this 'stuff' is a collection of what's made up 'me'...sure  it's just 'stuff',  but it all still means something to me.  How do you look at what makes up the memories of your life and say ' I don't want you anymore'?  Heartbreaking, to say the least...sniff, sniff.

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@sarahpanda 

When you figure it out, please write an essay and share it with me.  I have the same situation and I really have no answers for you.  It is HEARTBREAKING, to say the least. 

[D Kay]

You still have the memories, even if you don't have the stuff. The older I get the more I feel weighed down by stuff.

[homedecor1]

@sarahpanda 

It's not easy believe me I've been on the downsizing journey really committed these past few years.  

I have to trash or donate immediately because if the stuff sits in my house I keep it.

The hardest thing for me was the photo albums (which I scanned into computer), kids treasures, etc.

Over in the "Home" Forum is a great thread "What Did You Declutter Today" great advice and accomplishments from many -- check it out🙂

[Kachina624]

Remember it by taking pictures of it then wave goodbye to it.

[geezerette]

It's difficult when you have to do it all at once.  It's much easier to be able to take some time and go through things, perhaps put them aside, and then come back after a bit and reassess.  I often have a different outlook at that point and am ready to let it go.

Taking photos of what you can is a good idea.  Look at your new home and see what will comfortably fit in it and then decide what can't.  If you really can not part with some things, consider a storage unit for a while until you can get settled and then revisit them.

I think everyone has a certain number of possessions that are favorites that they want forever.  Those are put aside to keep.  Then you know how much room you have left and can start disposing of things that aren't as important to you.

I find now that I'm older and don't have as much energy and often don't feel as good as I used to, it's much easier to part with things.  I simply don't want to take care of it all anymore.

I also look at things that I think someone else may want (or not want) once I'm gone.  If it's something that I can't imagine anyone else would want or only has meaning to me, it's easier to part with.

Good luck.  It often gets easier once you start.

[Grace729]

Impermanence. Only hurts when I identify with anything and make an identity of it for myself.  Learn to enjoy watching people, places and things come and go.  Dance of leilah. The play of form. Recognizing all will pass

[Q4u]

Well..... I know that if you're not careful it all can potentially mean something that might prompt keeping it.  I'm sentimental about stuff, even about the clothing that I wore to "such and such".  but I have managed to keep the items that mean the most to me.  I like that the item prompts a memory, one that might not present itself without the item.  I have never minded giving things up and donating them but I'm careful to keep those things that mean the most to me.  

[SilleeMee]

If you're at a crossroads and can't decide what to do then look to hiring a professional organizer. That will bring in someone who is neutral to the situation and can help sort things out clearly.

[stevieb]

@sarahpanda  I've been going through the same thing for the past year and am still working on it. I can tell you the only way to do it is to not over-think it. Start sifting, tossing anything that doesn't really reach out to you into a discard pile and don't look back. Wait a day before you toss out the trash and anything that comes back into your mind a few times is something you might want to fish out of the trash bag, but let the rest go. You'll still have regrets days, weeks or months down the road, but if you over-think every item, you'll never get the job done. It also helps to have a 'maybe' pile while sifting but you have to exercise real control to not overload the 'keep' and 'maybe' piles. You have to be determined and to some extent you have to be fearless and a little bit heartless, keeping in mind the reality that there simply isn't the need for, or the space for, all that stuff.