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Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,761
Registered: ‎02-27-2012

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

@sarahpanda 

 

I am so sorry....you ALL will be in my prayers.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,725
Registered: ‎01-25-2023

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

I am so sorry that you are facing this, and I am hoping that your friend did not mean to sound so callous and uncaring-that she was simply at a loss of what to say. 

My prayers are with you and with your beloved husband, Sarahpanda.

Lynn-Critter Lover!
(especially cats!)
Valued Contributor
Posts: 701
Registered: ‎03-14-2011

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

My husband died 7 mo. ago and for me it has gotten harder .  I find the same with people but oh for someone to give a hug, take a walk, visit.  I was always independent but am finding 62 years together brought joy in being there for each other.  Love to you and will be praying for you and me

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,686
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

It is very difficult and people really do not know what to say so they just blurt out something. Don't take it to heart.

Everyone deals with the loss of a loved one differently and you will know what is right for you.

Prayers sent.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,262
Registered: ‎11-24-2013

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

@sarahpanda I'm so very sorry and that person should be slapped for saying that.

 

18 years ago my 10 year old GD died from a glioblastoma. Our family still feels it. My DH died in 2009 and it took me 3 days before I could shed a tear and then they came nonstop.

 

Everyone experiences it differently and you will too. I have no advice but to just let your feelings come.

 

And IGNORE ignorant and stupid remarks if you can.

 

I hope you will come here and talk when you feel the need.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,004
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?


@Forbidden Fruit wrote:

@sarahpanda 

 

Sometimes I think people feel they "need" to say something, when in fact, they should just listen.  

 

Keep holding your husband's hand and tell him what you need him to hear.  He knows you are there and can hear you even if he can't respond. You will experience many emotions, so I hope you will extend yourself some grace and time. No one will completely understand until they walk the same path.  

 

Prayers for peace and strength to you and your husband for the days ahead. 


@sarahpanda - @Forbidden Fruit says this so well. I am so sorry. A good friend of mine walked a similar path until her husband died yesterday morning. He was in and out of the hospital for a month, and she was alternately hopeful and resigned. 

 

Please know others are thinking of you and lifting you and your husband in prayer. I will also pray for your other loved ones and for the medical staff attending your husband. 


@Forbidden Fruit is right. Hearing is the sense that lasts the longest. Your heartbreak is yours alone. No one has anything like it. Give yourself permission to feel the way you do, and to say what you want, with no regrets.

 

@matty liz - I'm so sorry about your husband's death. I will pray for your comfort and strength to handle what you need to. I will pray you are constantly surrounded by the love of family and friends. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 21,957
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?


@matty liz wrote:

My husband died 7 mo. ago and for me it has gotten harder .  I find the same with people but oh for someone to give a hug, take a walk, visit.  I was always independent but am finding 62 years together brought joy in being there for each other.  Love to you and will be praying for you and me


@matty liz 

 

I'm so sorry for your loss.💔

 

When you've shared your life with that same special person for so many years, I find now the worst thing is probably just the lack of companionship.   Having that other person that knew me better than I knew myself sometimes.  No one, not the best of friends or family members, can take that place.

 

You are still in the infancy of grief.  Some days will be worse than others.  Grief doesn't have a time limit.  Be kind to yourself and do what you need to do for you.❤️

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,101
Registered: ‎06-10-2010

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

[ Edited ]

@sarahpanda I'm so sorry to hear this. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,649
Registered: ‎07-10-2019

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?

[ Edited ]

@sarahpanda  It happened to me too quite young at 45 with DH.

 

I had hospice at home for him as I was quite young and had the strength to do it with their help of course when necessary.  it was about 6 months as he was only 52. 

 

I having nothing to say to others but "I'm sorry for your loss, if there is anything I can do to help please let me know". 

 

I went through the same thing, my grandmother at 99 died, etc.  It's not the best thing to say and makes things worse. It's only about you and your situation and your life which no one understands.

 

I would suggest purchasing a book "widow to widow" which is very realistic and will be to come down the road.  

 

So with that said "I am sorry for your loss and if there is anything I can do let me know please.".  Best. Prayers.

Regular Contributor
Posts: 247
Registered: ‎09-04-2014

Re: How do you explain heartbreak?


@matty liz wrote:

My husband died 7 mo. ago and for me it has gotten harder .  I find the same with people but oh for someone to give a hug, take a walk, visit.  I was always independent but am finding 62 years together brought joy in being there for each other.  Love to you and will be praying for you and me


@matty liz 

 

Wow! 62 years together.  Truly was a gift.

 

Please reach out to someone for a visit. Or find a group to join that shares a similar interest. The problem is when the funeral is over, many people have to go back to their jobs/lives/whatever whereas your world has changed and you have to adjust. Then all of a sudden, a lot of time has passed.

 

They may not want to reach out for fear of intruding on your grief, saying the wrong thing, not knowing what to expect or just out of guilt because so much time has passed.  I'm sorry for your loss but don't be afraid to tell someone what you need.  I'm sure you have people out there who care about you and wonder how you are but are afraid to ask.  Deepest sympathy for your loss. Hugs, hugs and one more, big HUG.