Among Friends

[sandy53]

If all you received is a save-the-date card you do not need to do anything.  It's not asking for an RSVP.  You are jumping the gun.  When you get the actual invitation then just fill out the reply card saying you decline.  There is not a space on the card for "why" and you don't need to say.  You can write a nice note about her grandparents, etc. in the card you plan to send with a gift, but you still do not need to explain why you chose not to attend. 

[BarbiHollywood]

@sandy53 

Hello!  Thanks for the post.  I resolved this a few weeks ago.  I received the Save The Date about a year ago and received the invitation for the wedding which will be in a few weeks.  I had struggled with an RSVP because I felt that since I had the Save The Date for so long, I wouldn't have booked anything else on that date and couldn't think of a reason why we wouldn't attend.  The bride-to-be is the granddaughter of our (now deceased) longtime friends.  It will be at a venue a few hours away (hotel) and the bride-to-be requested certain attire (that neither my husband nor myself have in our closets).  The gals on here were so great with suggestions on how to respond politely.  I RSVP'd with a simple, sincere note.  It felt good to just do it.  Short and sweet.  And now we have a free weekend to enjoy!

Thanks again!  :-)))