Have You Ever Had The Feeling - Page 4

RedTop · ‎09-01-2010

At 65, I personally have not experienced these thoughts.

I heard my maternal grandparents express these same thoughts, and my mother has been saying it often after she turned 80, 6 years ago.

My dad knew his time was near, a week before he passed of a staph infection that shut down his kidneys. We were making plans to bring him home, and he told us he wanted to die right where he was, and he did.

I have a very clear grasp and understanding of what's happening in the world, but my focus, and personal responsibility lies with what goes on under my roof, and with my immediate family.

I take care of whatever happens here in my corner of WV, and do not feel a responsibility to carry the worlds problems. Whatever happens out there, stays out there; I do not absorb that fear and let it rule my life.

Each day I'm given is my one and only chance to make it a good day, and I do my best to end my days with the same positivity I woke up with.

Georgiagrama · ‎03-19-2010

@KaySD wrote:
@rms1954
Everyone I've ever known has had this thought, at least fleetingly, at some point in their life. Or else has actively avoided or repressed it. Pretty much the same thing.

The older my friends and I get, the more readily such thoughts and feelings arise. I believe this is seldom morbid or a cause for concern, but a simple acknowledgement that life will not continue indefinitely. We are mortal beings. It's part of how we process this fact. And people who are actually are close to death often become aware of it, in a rather matter-of-fact way.

Of course, each of us is different. You may be preparing yourself, or you may just be "rehearsing," or it may even be something you are curious about. But unless you become obsessed or fearful enough that it interfere with your life, you probably don't need to take any action .

Talking about it much to people close to you tends to create drama for them, and is seldom helplful. What does seem to work is to look at it without fear, and then get on with your currrent life.

@KaySD This, for me, is one of the best replies I've read. I am a sickeningly optimistic person. I always find something good in the bad (except the death of my loved ones) and always have believed that things work out for the best. Maybe not always our best, but the best for the situation.

I have always believed that as long as I was needed by my family, God would grant me time on earth. As my children are now grown with families of their own, and I am in my mid seventies, I have begun to consider my mortality. I think it is exactly as you said. As you age, you realize you don't have the time that you once had and it does tend to influence decisions and choices you make. I don't walk around with a little black rain cloud over my head, but, I am aware, and I am grateful for every day.

Georgiagrama · ‎03-19-2010

@jubilant What a wonderful answer. I'm certainly not ready for death, but, I have faith that when I do go, it will be to a better place.

KaySD · ‎08-16-2016

@Georgiagrama wrote:
@KaySD wrote:
@rms1954
Everyone I've ever known has had this thought, at least fleetingly, at some point in their life. Or else has actively avoided or repressed it. Pretty much the same thing.

The older my friends and I get, the more readily such thoughts and feelings arise. I believe this is seldom morbid or a cause for concern, but a simple acknowledgement that life will not continue indefinitely. We are mortal beings. It's part of how we process this fact. And people who are actually are close to death often become aware of it, in a rather matter-of-fact way.

Of course, each of us is different. You may be preparing yourself, or you may just be "rehearsing," or it may even be something you are curious about. But unless you become obsessed or fearful enough that it interfere with your life, you probably don't need to take any action .

Talking about it much to people close to you tends to create drama for them, and is seldom helplful. What does seem to work is to look at it without fear, and then get on with your currrent life.
@KaySD This, for me, is one of the best replies I've read. I am a sickeningly optimistic person. I always find something good in the bad (except the death of my loved ones) and always have believed that things work out for the best. Maybe not always our best, but the best for the situation.
I have always believed that as long as I was needed by my family, God would grant me time on earth. As my children are now grown with families of their own, and I am in my mid seventies, I have begun to consider my mortality. I think it is exactly as you said. As you age, you realize you don't have the time that you once had and it does tend to influence decisions and choices you make. I don't walk around with a little black rain cloud over my head, but, I am aware, and I am grateful for every day.

@Georgiagrama
I love what you said and I'm glad if my words contributed. Death is a transition like any other major life event, don't you think? I mean, physical death is simple, a matter of breathing out and not breathing in again, but the realization of it is an ongoing thing. It blends with the other elements in my life. Knowing it is approaching becomes part of my inner landscape, and is a sort of friendly advisor helping me navigate my days.

(As for optimism being sickening, I'm guessing you don't really mean that. Remember Pollyanna? Ever been told you are like her? I say, I bet Pollyanna had a happy life!)

KaySD · ‎08-16-2016

@Vivian

Hi, Vivian. At 98, thoughts of death are not wrong. It seems to me it would be rather odd if your mother were not aware of the approaching end of her life.

Death is not necessarily bad or depressing--a moment comes for each of us when it is appropriate and welcome. In my experience, when a person is feeling she is getting ready to leave human life, she probably is. It's a way of saying her life is complete.

But it's a process. It takes time. If you can support her in being ready when the time comes, that will be a great gift. I wish you well with all my heart.

KaySD · ‎08-16-2016

@Foxxee wrote:
I'm thinking it's more the end of time that's coming soon; which would mean it's the end of mine and everyone else's too.

@Foxxee

That is possible, of course. Still, life happens one moment at a time, and you get to choose how to experience this moment, and this moment, and this moment...

KaySD · ‎08-16-2016

@jubilant wrote:
@rms1954 Yes, I have had those feelings. I think the secret is to have them but don't let them "nest".

We are all going to die of something. If covid doesn't get us something else will eventually. The doctors tell me, according to statistics for what my heart problems are, it will be just a matter of time before I need more intervention. They say I will probably do ok for 5 yrs.(almost 3 yrs. have passed now) and shortly after that I will, more than likely, need more medical intervention. You know, that was really starting to work on my mind. Then, I thought.....I could get hit by a car crossing the street tomorrow. I believe at the moment of death, I will pass from here to a place where there will be no more sickness, sorrow, or pain. I realize there are those who belive differently and that is their choice, of course but I say this because, for me, I feel I have been given great hope and peace......not because of anything I did or didn't do but because of what God has done for me.

@jubilant

You are well-named!

mintedrose · ‎03-04-2017

Yes, I had that feeling 8 years ago or so.... lost a lot. I really didnt wanna be here anymore... So, I figured if im gonna go anyway, might as well do the things ive always wanted to do and never had the time because work consumed every bit of it. So i started to do the little things. It brought me joy that the world took away.

~No act of kindness, no matter how small is ever wasted~ Aesop