Got Yelled at for trying to help - Page 5

suzyQ3 · ‎03-09-2010

This is a little bit different of a situation, but there is a regular customer at my market who is in a wheelchair. He is always angry and downright abusive to the employees.

I don't know whether it's his disability that makes him act out or whether it's just who he is.

It must be awful to go through life so bitter.

~Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

alicedee · ‎07-25-2010

@grandma petes You did the right thing. Having physical limitations doesn’t give you a free pass to be rude and obnoxious....I would assume this woman was either mentally ill or has always been obnoxious, so it was her normal behavior. You handled the situation with kindness and grace. If she had snarled at me like you experienced, I probably would have stood there staring at her in disbelief!

Last week I saw a woman trying to manipulate her motorized chair to get something from a shelf at the store. I smiled and said hi...asked if she needed any help. She smiled back and said, “No, I’ve got it.” I smiled again and said ok, and wished her a good day.

I also am short, and always have to ask someone to reach those 2ltr. Diet Pepsi bottles (they always put them on the top shelf, and they are wedged in so tightly I can’t get a grip and pull one out). People have always been kind about it.

Thank you @grandma petes for being a kind person.

Ketra · ‎02-16-2018

@grandma petes I believe the woman was angry with herself and her illness for not being able to do what she wants to do. When someone used to be able to accomplish anything they wanted and no longer can, it can be very hard psychologically as well as physically. Especially if they are on their own. She may have had a bad day, in pain, and was at the end of her rope. However, if she responds to people like that regularly, it’s not a good sign of her mental well being. You were very kind and gracious. Praying for her was the best thing you could do for her.

Anonymous032819 · ‎03-29-2019

She was probably just frustrated that she couldn't get the item, and at all that she has lost, and clings to what she can still do, and didn't appreciate someone assuming that she was helpless.

I wouldn't give it a second thought.

Earlier this month, I was grocery shopping, and a man with a cane dropped an item on the floor.

I saw that he was struggling to pick it up, so I asked him if I could get that item for him.

He said, "Yes, please. Thank-you."

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.

occasionalrain · ‎03-10-2010

It may have been your tone. Was it condescending? I hated adults talking down to me when I was a child.

jannabelle1 · ‎09-12-2010

My DH needs to use a scooter in grocery stores, but he would never react the way this woman did to you. Please don't think that all folks who need the assistance of a scooter would react that way. That woman was just an angry person who turned her anger to you. Not good, but some people are like that. Most people would be appreciative....unfortunately there are always a few who aren't.

1Snickers · ‎03-19-2016

@Suziepeach Your parking lot incident reminded me of my son’s friend.

He was from England and came here for a visit. Funny guy. He said he was walking by the river when a man’s hat blew off. He was older and walked with a cane.

Thinking to help the man the friend waded knee deep and retrieved the hat.

He gave it to him and the man shouted that he didn’t need help and he could have gotten it.

My sons friend asked to see the hat. After inspecting it he threw it back in the water exclaiming “ sorry old chap”!

grandma petes · ‎03-09-2010

@occasionalrain wrote:
It may have been your tone. Was it condescending? I hated adults talking down to me when I was a child.

All I asked was “can I help you with that?”. I would never be condescending to anyone. After many years as a caregiver to my Mother and Brother...both in wheelchairs, my only intention was to be helpful and sincere in my concern to make her day a little easier. There were many instances in caring for them that an act of kindness such as holding a door open or lending a hand when needed would have been appreciated so very much. That was what I tried to do for her.

Desertdi · ‎03-13-2010

I was just thinking of something kinda funny (to me). Just because I'm "older" I guess..........some people try to "help" me park my car, by waving their arms to the left and right....and making STOP signals..........

It really aggravates (nicest word I can think of) me.

♥Surface of the Sun♥

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

@CelticCrafter wrote:
I was in Michaels on Saturday and was looking at something way down on the bottom shelf - floor level - I was wishing there was someone else in the aisle with me because I had a hard time getting myself back up. I should have known better than to stoop down that low to look at something. If I have something to lean on I can get myself back up but I was afraid to lean on the shelves for fear of pulling them down on top of me.

I can relate to that. Before my knee replacement surgery, I would sometimes have trouble getting up out of a chair that didn't have two arm rests or none at all. Sometimes, I could manage it but sometimes I couldn't. I never hesitated to ask for help. I'd just explain "I have bad knees, can you help pull me up, please?" You should never hesitate to ask for help when you need it. I never had any one refuse or be anything except kind.