Among Friends

[on the bay]

@TenderMercies-

Oh-thank you. I didn't know that.

I think facebook has its benefits but also can be hurtful and too much time spent on things you never meant to spend time with!

I liked it for awhile but deactivated it for now.  I like having more real conversations better and don't want to spend free time looking at it. I guess I'd rather interact with someone I usually do anyway and not on the computer or facebook phone.

Plus, I got tired of liking or noticing every post more than once a day every day by people who need that kind of adoration , approval or affirmation.

It just doesn't seem to be a very interactive way to communicate with each other more needing of lots of likes.

And pictures- my family sends each other pictures by text or email or gives them to each other-yes a real picture! 

I mmight go back at some point but I don't really miss it right now.

@TenderMercies-

I don't know if you want to  but you might like to deactivate yours for awhile and see how you feel about it all. Then you won't be obligated to see people's posts or afraid you'll hurt someone's feelings by responding to some and not to others. Just a suggestion. I know a lot of people do that just like we all may take a break from these forums at times.

[LyndaGee]

It's happened.  I never pursue it, but I can figure it out in some cases.  For example, I had two Facebook friends who are sisters who don't get along.  Last spring, I complemented one on an outfit she wore to church, and the other dropped me!  I assume that was the reason.  Geesh.

[TenderMercies]

I just went back to her page and noticed another close, mutual friend of ours is no longer her friend, either.  That made me feel a little better.  My biggest concern is that I somehow did something to hurt her.  If someone annoys me on Facebook, I usually just use the Unfollow option, so I no longer see any of their posts.  If I unfriend someone, it is because they post something really terrible.

[Melvin-QVC]

I usually delete someone from my page when I "clean house".  Sometimes I will go through my friends, take inventory and notice some have to go.  The way I look at it is if you barely speak, you never post, you only look at what others are posting, with an occasional like, heart, smile, emoji, etc.... Why are you on here?  Why are we friends? If we are not friends off of Facebook, why should we be friends on Facebook?  Just my way of thinking I guess.  And btw, if someone "unfriends" me...... their lost!!  I think when you have others things to deal with, bigger fish to fry, Facebook friends don't really matter.  (just my personal opionion) 

[mima]

I have deleted people for posting graphic pics of animal abuse and abortions.  I get on FB for enjoyment.  I don't get on to see that.  I don't explain it to them.

I don't care if people post things political that I don't agree with, BUT if that is the only thing they post about I delete them also.  Same with religion.  

Just trying to give you some ideas of what "might" have happened.

[TenderMercies]

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@Melvin-QVC wrote:

I usually delete someone from my page when I "clean house".  Sometimes I will go through my friends, take inventory and notice some have to go.  The way I look at it is if you barely speak, you never post, you only look at what others are posting, with an occasional like, heart, smile, emoji, etc.... Why are you on here?  Why are we friends? If we are not friends off of Facebook, why should we be friends on Facebook?  Just my way of thinking I guess.  And btw, if someone "unfriends" me...... their lost!!  I think when you have others things to deal with, bigger fish to fry, Facebook friends don't really matter.  (just my personal opionion) 

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@Melvin-QVC I’ve never understood the concept of “cleaning house” on Facebook. It’s not like you need to free up space for more friends, or having too many friends slows down your account.  Like I said earlier, you have the “unfollow” option which basically allows you to ignore someone without having to unfriend them.  This is a much more civil option than cutting someone out.  Part of the nice thing about FB is being able to keep up to date with people who aren’t often around or part of your life.  These aren’t the people I want to eliminate.  

[Moonchilde]

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@Melvin-QVC wrote:

I usually delete someone from my page when I "clean house".  Sometimes I will go through my friends, take inventory and notice some have to go.  The way I look at it is if you barely speak, you never post, you only look at what others are posting, with an occasional like, heart, smile, emoji, etc.... Why are you on here?  Why are we friends? If we are not friends off of Facebook, why should we be friends on Facebook?  Just my way of thinking I guess.  And btw, if someone "unfriends" me...... their lost!!  I think when you have others things to deal with, bigger fish to fry, Facebook friends don't really matter.  (just my personal opionion) 

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This is pretty much what I do, and I assume others who no longer reply to or acknowedge any of my posts are doing the same to me. What a lot of people don’t realize is that you can change your settings so that you don’t see someone’s posts without Unfriending them. 

When I realize that someone never comments on my posts at all, not even with an emoji, over weeks, I stop commenting on theirs. Meh. What is most likely to get me to Unfriend someone or no longer Follow them, though, are people who use their FB page for nothing but “causes” or the two forum no-nos. I rarely post anything like that to my FB, because I know how much it annoys me when others do it.

Sometimes, people just bore you, or you bore them; it happens. I have a relative that I love who I would never Unfriend, but she posts almost nothing but memes and clickbait stuff and I don’t want those posts clogging up my Feed every day so I just set it so I don’t see her posts unless I go to her page.

And yes, FB Friends are not necessarily the same as real, flesh and blood friends. Sometimes it’s hard to realize that.

[BalletBabe]

I had someone delete me and I asked her why:   Ready?  She posted a picture of her lobster dinner and I said oh my !  Those things are so ugly how can you eat them?   LOLOLOLOLOL

[Moonchilde]

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@TenderMercies wrote:

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@Melvin-QVC wrote:

I usually delete someone from my page when I "clean house".  Sometimes I will go through my friends, take inventory and notice some have to go.  The way I look at it is if you barely speak, you never post, you only look at what others are posting, with an occasional like, heart, smile, emoji, etc.... Why are you on here?  Why are we friends? If we are not friends off of Facebook, why should we be friends on Facebook?  Just my way of thinking I guess.  And btw, if someone "unfriends" me...... their lost!!  I think when you have others things to deal with, bigger fish to fry, Facebook friends don't really matter.  (just my personal opionion) 

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@Melvin-QVC I’ve never understood the concept of “cleaning house” on Facebook. It’s not like you need to free up space for more friends, or having too many friends slows down your account.  Like I said earlier, you have the “unfollow” option which basically allows you to ignore someone without having to unfriend them.  This is a much more civil option than cutting someone out.  Part of the nice thing about FB is being able to keep up to date with people who aren’t often around or part of your life.  These aren’t the people I want to eliminate.  

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@TenderMercies, as far as “freeing up space” - when I go to read my FB page, if I have a great many Friends posting as well as Pages or Groups I joined, I have trouble getting through all the posts, i.e. when it takes me more than 2 hrs straight a day just to read them, never mind making any posts myself, that’s too much and I don’t like it. I can’t keep up. About 8 months ago, I did a sweep of multiple Pages and Groups to make my Feed more manageable, and Unfollowed a few Friends.

[on the bay]

@TenderMercies-

I was just thinking that if you hadn't communicated with either of them on facebook for awhile, that might be a reason.

I know only about a third of my "friends" on facebook we actually wrote back and forth at least once a week or so.

The rest, after a friend request from them, I rarely if ever heard from again after that initial hi.

I thought about deleting people that  I had nothing against, just that we just never had any interaction for months, or they maybe never posted at all so you would wonder if they ever went on.

I didn't because I didn't want to hurt anyones feelings. I just unfollowed them.These are people I hadn't seen in years and probably wouldn't see again. We were friends from years ago.

You probably know that you can make your settings so people cannot see who your friends are.

Thats how I had mine.

I think it is kind of

rude to delete people and they would never know why. I'd rather not be on facebook at all than pick and chose who I decided was a "friend" or not.

Of course if someone posts only really obnoxious things or racist or any kind of unnaceptable things, I did delete one like that.

I heard on the news tonight that facebook is going to request users send a picture of themselves for "security" sake or something and it would be deleted once sent or something -sorry it sounds vague but it wasnt a very clear report. Then they were asking what people thought of that and if they thought it was okay.It made me kind of glad Im not on there right now. Kind of shades of "1984", "big-brotherish!"