Among Friends

[susan kay]

I would just "give" it to the relative that you feel would enjoy the earrings and tell her where you got them and that they are not your style.  Since your friend bought these on vacation, and there is no way you can exchange them for something that you would like, that is what I would do. Don't save them for an occasion, such as a birthday. Just give them to your relative.   I don't regift.  Years ago a friend of mine regifted a present to me.  It was a hard bound, beautiful book.  Unfortunately, a few hours after I received the "present", I found an inscription a few pages into the book.  There was a personal note to my regifter and signed by the person who gave it to her.  Tacky. 

[chi5925]

Did I miss something?

Was there an amendment passed to the US Constitution that requires a gift be actually purchased by the giftor to the giftee??

Seriously......as long as the gift is new, unused -- what's the big deal in giving it to someone else?

[circles]

I will give a gift I don't care for to someone who would like it...but not as a gift....thats tacky.....I would tell them how I came to have it and ask if they would like it....

[RedTop]

Yes I have, without any qualms whatsoever.  The incident that immediately comes to mind also involved a pair of earrings that was not my style.  However, I did wear them once to lunch with a close friend, who noticed them, and commented on them immediately.  Halfway thru our lunch my friend made another comment about the earrings, in terms of them being something she would buy for herself.  During dessert, she looked me in the eye and asked point blank why in the world I ever bought myself those earrings, when it was obvious I didn't like them that much!  I explained how I came to have those earrings in the first place, and when we were in the parking lot saying goodbye, I took the earrings out and gave them to her.  

[nomless]

---

@chi5925 wrote:

Did I miss something?

Was there an amendment passed to the US Constitution that requires a gift be actually purchased by the giftor to the giftee??

Seriously......as long as the gift is new, unused -- what's the big deal in giving it to someone else?

---

The big deal about a regift is that there's no thought behind it.  It's impersonal.  It's a means for the giver to get rid of stuff.  It's a hand-me-down even if unused.  It's tacky and disrespectful.

And no, it's not about the money.  Consider these two scenarios:  If someone is unable to afford the purchase of a gift at a special time, I would rather get nothing than something they're giving me only because they hate it.  On the other hand,  if they're giving me something they cherish because they know I love it, too, that's a special gift. It's the thought behind the two gifts that matters.  The first is meaningless.  The second has great meaning.

[nomless]

---

@RedTop wrote:

Yes I have, without any qualms whatsoever.  The incident that immediately comes to mind also involved a pair of earrings that was not my style.  However, I did wear them once to lunch with a close friend, who noticed them, and commented on them immediately.  Halfway thru our lunch my friend made another comment about the earrings, in terms of them being something she would buy for herself.  During dessert, she looked me in the eye and asked point blank why in the world I ever bought myself those earrings, when it was obvious I didn't like them that much!  I explained how I came to have those earrings in the first place, and when we were in the parking lot saying goodbye, I took the earrings out and gave them to her.  

---

The difference is that she admired them and told you so.  Totally OK to give them to her in a casual situation "just because.". 

[blackhole99]

I have been regifted to many times from relatives, they tell me who bought it for them and why they don't like it and offer it to me. So being afraid of hurting their feelings and seeming ungrateful, I will accept the unwanted item and then just dispose of it. I have regifted, but only if it's like a secret Santa at work.

[chiclets]

NO

[Tinkrbl44]

Yikes .....  I didn't realize there were so many tactless people in the world!

Hey, we recycle all sorts of things ..... and if I was given something that just wasn't me, what am I supposed to do with it?    Throw it out?     Give it to Goodwill?   

Truth be told, a lot of people aren't very good at selecting gifts and the recipient shouldn't have to "suffer" and wear or use something they don't like!    

[AngelPuppy1]

I don't want to waste something by just leaving it set or throwing it out.  So, I will give it away.  Not as a gift, really, but just, if I think a family member or friend could make use of it.