Among Friends

[jubilant]

My sister and I keep flowers on Mom and 

Dads gravesite.It is our way of honoring  them and our wonderful memories of them.  

We both walk away with peace in our hearts knowing that one day we will see them again.

[Carmie]

I find my loved ones are always with me and not at the cemetery.

I have no need to visit.  My family is located in three different cemeteries.

My husband on the other hand, likes to visit his family in cemeteries. He also likes to do maintenance around the gravestone.  He keeps the grass trimmed around the stone and he washes the moss and black streaks from headstones with a battery operated pressure washer.  

Sometimes I go with him and sometimes he goes alone.  He needs the visits and misses his family.  I carry my family with me and don't feel anything at the cemetery.

[Pook]

I don't understand that tradition and many just have to go like clockwork.  My mother, grandmother and uncle used to drag my sister and me and  proceed to walk all around and gossip about those buried and their family scandels!  I observed that many would come in groups like a family reunion and stay for a few hours laughing and carrying on.  My mother always said just pay attention to her and visit her while she is alive - when dead it is just a body iin the ground!!  I do feel close to those who are gone and don' st need a tombstone to remember them! 

To each there own I guess!! 

[I am still oxox]

No its out of the question I would rather remember my parents as happy living beings not a stone in the ground 

[threecees]

I visit my parents' graves often throughout they year. My mother just passed away

in late summer so I was in charge of everything that included her burial. My father

and brother were laid to rest years ago in the family plot.

I find peace at the cemetery. As a child I went to many visitations of family members

and burials with my mother. I come from a large family so I have been visiting

cemeteries often. In the summer I always clean off the headstone and put flowers

and flags up up for Memorial Day. The cemetery is nicely maintained with regular

grass cutting.

My father would have turned 100 years old last month and I went to visit the cemetery

to tell him Happy Birthday in heaven. 

It's a personal choice but it's the right choice for me.

[FranandZoe]

My husband was cremated.  So no grave to visit.  Sometimes I wonder if that's a bad thing.  But cremation was what he wanted.   Some of his ashes I scatteed in the rose bushes around my patio - he loved sitting out there.  So he's close.

I visit my parents' graves a few times a year.  

My Mother and Grandmother were big on visiting graves so I did it a lot growing up.

My SIL died two and a half years ago - my brother spends time at her grave daily.  Not sure that's a good thing.  I think it contributes to his depression.

(((HUGS))) Everyone.  It's tough.

[BExplorer]

I am fortunate enough to still have both parents living. I do, however, visit my grandson's grave quite often. I always make sure it looks nice and is decorated in remembrance of him.

My sympathies to all who are grieving

[ILOVEDOGS]

If visiting the gravesite gives you comfort you should go but if it makes you sad why put yourself through that?  Everyone is different, I believe that my mother is gone and visiting her columbarium is too painful, brings back horrible sadness.  My 95 year old dad gets some comfort going to the gravesite and so does my brother.

[RedTop]

I do not, nor do I feel a need to do this.  

[Sooner]

@Carmie Like you, I don't relate the graves to the people.  The people aren't there.  They are in heaven as I believe.  I just don't get vibes by graves.  Lots of folks do.  I don't.  My husband feels the same way.