Among Friends

[blackhole99]

I think some women do, an acquaintance of mine bought herself a Corvette in her mid fifties, divorced her husband and started dating a younger man. I guess she figured this was her last chance to fulfill her dreams. I personally prefer to grow old gracefully, no weird hairdo's or facial remodeling, nips and tucks.I'm still thrilled with my husband of 45 years and we drive a truck.

[Annabellethecat66]

I’m sorry...but I think it’s an excuse.  People will do what they want....I’ve seen it time after time with both men and women.

[GenXmuse]

I think I did but it stemmed from unhappiness with my life. 

[momoftwo2007]

I am reading "The Wisdom of Menopause".  In one of the chapters, the author says that men express their midlife crises outwardly, so some men do buy expensive cars and have affairs. But many women express inwardly, thus some have physical problems, emotional problems, or start making big decisions, such as starting new careers or divorse,

[jannabelle1]

I honestly don't know of any woman who approaches middle age and all of a sudden starts excessively spending on material things or tries to look youthful again. I think for most women our spending habits may go through phases depending on our financial situation. And trying to look youthful again? No, some of us just have always taken care of our skin and our appearance as much as we can.

I think most midlife crises have to do more with men who are unhappy in their marriage (or think they are unhappy), are in their 50s, and start looking at younger women in hopes of continuing their youthful bloom! Of course a woman can do the same thing, but I think the odds are with a man doing this more than a woman.

I find your comment "excessive spending on material things or trying to look youthful once again" interesting.....what made you ask the question in those terms?

[pigletsmom]

I think most midlife periods come from the realization that you're aging and lets face it, women are focused on that fairly early on. Men seem to have something that will strike them suddenly that causes them to face that they are getting older. As we ladies try to hold off wrinkles we're pretty aware that time is moving on. But I have to say there are some days when I look in the mirror and am suddenly surprised by something that I realize looks much worse than I thought.

[Foxxee]

Yes it is real and they do if youth, attractiveness, and regrets become more important than values. 

Their behavior noticeably changes, become obsessed with looking young, often have an affair to prove to themselves they are still attractive.  They sneak around.  Their husbands notice a change in their behavior. 

As with men, it begins at around 40.  Men usually look for very young pretty women who confirm they are still young and attractive.  

For both men and women, often there are regrets with their marriages, jobs, what they accomplished in their lives.  For women, it lasts from 2-5 years.  Men up to 8 years.  

When they accept they are getting older, often they want to return to their spouses if a divorce hadn't taken place.  

But, despite some women go through it, it's still mostly men.   

[golding76]

Women can experience a crisis but not necessarily at mid-life, as is common for many men (at least according to lore).

I think our (women's) crises arrive when we are no longer needed.  For those with children, it can occur when all children have permanently left the home or married, and for those without children, when their spouse dies or they end up alone during their last decades.

Just some thoughts on the topic...

[mom2four0418]

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@golding76 wrote:

Women can experience a crisis but not necessarily at mid-life, as is common for many men (at least according to lore).

I think our (women's) crises arrive when we are no longer needed.  For those with children, it can occur when all children have permanently left the home or married, and for those without children, when their spouse dies or they end up alone during their last decades.

Children don't stop needing their mothers because they leave home/get married/have children. Likewise, mothers still need their children. It's all about love.

.

[Lindsays Grandma]

To be honest, I was too busy doing my job which I loved  to notice anything different about myself.  I was divorced so I didn't have a man around to notice a male midlife.  Actually, I think I was better off in the long run, life just kept running smoothly and I was happy.   However, I do remember my mother's midlife, the mood swings were not pretty and they didn't have medication or anything else to help women in those days.