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Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,523
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

My hubby has a friend (or rather ex-friend) just like this. I finally told my hubby that I looked up the definition of narcissist and there was his friend's picture, lol.

 

Very hard to be around, so now my hubby just avoids him.

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Valued Contributor
Posts: 946
Registered: ‎04-14-2018

Re: Do you know people like this?

I don't have friends like this.

 

I've spent too many years putting up wilth ill mannered people who are completely self absorbed. No more. Sure, I will listen to people like this, but I am not invested in them.

 

My friends, although not many in number, are considerate, kind and sincere.

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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,145
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

Yes I know people like that but they aren't my friends.  I couldn't imagine spending a lot of time with a "friend" who talked at you all the time about themselves....no thanks!

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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,113
Registered: ‎03-20-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

My sister for sure and to make it worse she will find a way to belittle anyone who do manage to speak by correcting their grammar or asking if they gained weight or proclaiming that what they are wearing is not a good look, etc.  My So's cousin and his wife are both like that.  He is close with his cousin - like a brother but thank goodness they don't live close to us.  Over the years they know I have had breathing issues and scents really bother me - they have witnessed my severe coughing spells many times but yet keep giving me perfume - even after my SO has told them over and over that I don't want gifts and that I can't wear perfumes.  They like me and we get along - they just want to talk about themselves.

I finally quit associating with my sister and SO goes alone to visit his cousin.

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Valued Contributor
Posts: 789
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

I have people in my life who have more drama than necessary to want to listen to  from time to time or those who know more than anyone else on certain subjects  or likes to brag on themselves more than they should from time to time and those who repeat  the same stories over and over.

 

What I do is listen and inject where I can or just ignore.  I have some I can only talk to every now and then.  I do not have anyone that totally does these things all the time.  Some are family and I can't cut them out of my life nor do I want to  but you can talk to them less often on the phone or call them when you feel like talking.

 

I have a good circle of friends and we all bring something to the table and respect each other.  We are not perfect and I am sure I do things that bug people as well.  I can be all those things I mentioned now and then as well.  

 

I do not have all about me friendships.  Not who I am or people I choose to be friends with.  

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,348
Registered: ‎05-17-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?


@Sooner wrote:

What do I do?  Listen.  I know I am way more boring that most people, so I just listen.

 

It's that or sit by myself. 


 

@Sooner   I don't have that many friends...maybe 2 or 3. Sometimes, at this age, complaining about their health, their kids not calling, etc. is all that's happening in their life. I'm like you, I listen. If the shoe was on the other foot, I wouldn't want to be cast aside if I needed to "talk". 

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Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,396
Registered: ‎04-19-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

Last summer I was eyeball deep in caring for my mother during multiple health crises. My friend called and after listening to my story actually said I should call her after things styled down. No sympathy, no offers of support, nothing. Just call her when I was done. Gee thanks.


-- pro-aging --
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Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,190
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

I had a friend like that years ago.  I just quit responding to her and she finally quit calling.  I wasn't interested in a one way friendship.  She never listened to a word I said.

My little dog, a heartbeat at my feet. —Edith Wharton
What greater gift than the love of a cat.--Charles Dickens





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Honored Contributor
Posts: 21,839
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?

I get the feeling it isn't "friends",  it's just one friend who is like that.  That's just who she is.  You can't change her.  You call her a friend so, there must be some positives that you like about her.  Focus on those things.  Accept that she is self centered.  If you can't do that, cut ties with her because she isn't going to morph into the person you want her to be, that's not going to happen.  Keep in mind that every single one of us has some trait that someone else finds irritating or objectionable.  

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,348
Registered: ‎05-17-2010

Re: Do you know people like this?


@Peaches McPhee wrote:

Last summer I was eyeball deep in caring for my mother during multiple health crises. My friend called and after listening to my story actually said I should call her after things styled down. No sympathy, no offers of support, nothing. Just call her when I was done. Gee thanks.


 

 

@Peaches McPhee   I get it. When I recently went through the year of traveling back and forth to check on my Mom and then visit all the months she was in Hospice, what could anyone really do to help? Support? There's nothing they could help with and I didn't want to talk about her health decline each time I came home exhausted. I can't fault them.