Among Friends

[sarahpanda]

A couple of weeks ago, my DH died at home....in his bed, where he wanted to die. The last few days were a real struggle for him.  He hadn't spoken for a day or so, I was laying beside him on the bed, with my hand under his hand and right before he passed, I felt him gently squeeze my hand, but very notable....then it released, he took his final breaths and was gone. I am a fish out of water now.  I try to stay busy but get overwhelmed . I feel like I've got all this love to give him and its blocked and there is no where for it to go and it hurts like he*l.  I'm posting this because some had asked me to keep them updated about DH...so this is the update friends....Sorry if I made you cry...it's my new norm.

[Group 5 minus 1]

Don't apologize. I am so sorry for your loss.You have done a fine job of describing a loved ones last moments.

[AngelPuppy1]

@sarahpanda 

You have my deepest condolences.  I am so very sorry to read this.  Thank goodness that he was able to pass on his own terms and with you by his side.  I can't even imagine how you must feel.  Give yourself plenty of time to grieve and lean on family and friends for support.  

[Jaspertimes]

Look for a grief share group in your area where you can let out your feelings and be surrounded with people who are going through the same thing.  

[Roscoe the Rascal]

I am very sorry for your loss.  My husband passed away in April and at home in bed as well.  Just like he wanted and I am very thankful for that.

It is a struggle but day by day is all you can do. Not easy for sure and keeping busy and sharing with my friend who also has lost her husband has helped.  People do not understand unless they have gone through it.  It is not the same kind of lose as any other.  My husband and I were together for 50 years and 46 were married years.

Give  your self some time and do not hide your feelings.  Talk about him so you can heal.  Hardest part for me at first was I knew he was gone but did not feel like he was gone.  It did not hit me at first because so much that had to be done.

All I can say  is not an easy journey but it is one that has to be traveled.

Take care and lean on family and friends.  Your husband would only want the best for you as you did him.  

[ID2]

So sorry for your loss. 

[Travone]

@sarahpanda 

I am so very sorry for your loss.  Nothing will heal your pain but time.  Be with family and friends who love you.   You are in my prayers   🙏

[Desertdi]

My sincerest condolences on your loss.

[Carolina925]

@sarahpanda , so sad for your loss. I've not experienced a loss of spouse but I have quite a few friends who have. My suggestion is to give yourself time to grieve, don't let others tell you when you need to "get over it", I don't believe you ever do. The crack on your heart will always be there, it just takes different times for it to heal enough to go on. I have heard that grief groups are a big help. Reach out to your friends when you need them, cry when you need to, feel sad and overwhelmed when the feelings crash over you, and allow yourself to heal. Remember, the blue sky is always up there, even when the clouds are temporarily covering it over. Take care of yourself.

[Imaoldhippie]

@sarahpanda ...............So very sorry for the lost of your hubby.  My daughter lost her hubby last October and is struggling.  She still goes to grief counseling and it has helped her plus she has now gone through all the holidays which helps too.  I recommend the counseling.  Take your time grieving its a long process for most.