Company's coming?

Starpolisher · ‎03-10-2010

I have a cousin that I keep in touch with through texting, Christmas cards and Social media. He lives about an hour away from me. He recently got engaged and wants to visit me with his fiancee. I've met his fiancee at another cousin's wedding. I like them both very much. The thing is, he's a lot younger than me(20 years) and I don't have much to talk to them about. I'm flattered He wants to visit but I hate having company and having to entertain, other than my immediate family or close friends(I rarely have any company as I discourage it.)I no longer cook and am already stressing as to whether I'm going to have to make a meal or will coffee/ cake be acceptable? I don't know why but, as I've gotten older, having company makes me feel anxious. He wants to know when I'm available?( he's persistent)Is there any way I can say I don't want company without hurting his feelings? Or should I just bite the bullet and get it over with?😅

"Kindness is like snow ~It beautifies everything it covers"
-Kahlil Gibran

gidgetgh · ‎03-09-2010

How long are they coming for? A few hours? 2 weeks?

If it is a few hours, how about suggesting a time that coincides with lunch or dinner and you all go out for that meal?

I spend 99% of my time alone. At this point, I would be soooooo flattered and filled with happiness that someone wanted to see me.

Why is it, when I have a 50/50 guess at something, I'm always 100% wrong?

piperbay · ‎04-03-2013

I would agree to meet with them but I would suggest meeting at a restaurant. I do understand that you don't feel like cooking or entertaining, as I get older I feel the same.

cheriere · ‎12-01-2023

@Starpolisher

I know just how you feel. I also get anxious over having company, especially when there's not a lot to talk about. It's hard when you feel as though you have to entertain them. However, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet.

Perhaps if you suggest the day and time, you can have a bit of control over how long the visit will last.🌸

DrakesMomma · ‎06-02-2010

If you don't want to "entertain" them suggest meeting at a restaurant near you or perhaps some where between where you both live.

Just because they are 20 years younger doesn't mean you won't have things to talk about.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

Say "Oh how wonderful! I would be available for you to stop by in the afternoon of any of these dates (give dates). Maybe you could stop by about (2 p.m., 3 p.m.) for a little cake and tea or coffee!"

Or suggest meeting at a local restaurant for lunch or afternoon coffee. Maybe dig out a few family pictures they wouldn't have seen to show them and chat about.

I think you will enjoy the visit and it will be wonderful for you to do this for them. Bought cookies or cake will be fine! Have fun. You are very blessed to have people who want to see you. Many don't.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

He's only an hour away so you don't have prepare a complete meal

Invite them for coffee . Make sure you say coffee. You can make tea and coffee and get some pastries from a local bakery. If you want to, buy a submarine sandwich. Slice it and arranged it on a pretty plate. He isn't coming to eat. He's coming to introduce his fiance to a family member. You. I think you should be flattered. The conversation will take care of itself. Weather, traffic, a family story or two. Let him do most of the talking.

Janey2 · ‎06-07-2010

Invite some or all of your immediate family over at the same time to meet the fiancée. That way it is not only up to you to entertain them if you feel pressure about the conversation. I would bring in food so you do not have to bother.

Pezzie · ‎12-12-2011

Don't overthink it. Be flattered he wants to come and formally introduce you to his fiancée. Conversations have a way of going from topic to topic with minimal prompting and will take care of itself. Just enjoy the visit and serve whatever you want. There is no script, just follow your heart and instinct.