Re: Comments that hurt

Travone · ‎10-14-2016

Oh my goodness. I should probably lock myself in my house and never come out again. I don't excel at anything, but boy do I have fun trying different things. Didn't know I had to be perfect to do certain things.

@bonnieludon't let a mean person stop you from doing what you love. Have a smile on your face and do what you love. You and your hubby are probably having more fun than the "perfect" people.

Life is too short to worry about the judgy judge people....there are just too many of them around lately.

Suzeecat · ‎05-05-2010

Ouch! What a shame that those nasty people had to ruin your enjoyment. It's hard to not be hurt. It's always best to respond the instant these things happen. Unfortunately, I am always taken aback and at a loss for words at the appropriate time. The best thing to say might have been "That's hurtful and I wish you had kept that to yourself. We may not be as good as you, but we paid the same amount and still want to continue in the hopes of improving. Either way, we just want to have fun." I don't know what can or should be said or done in the future. Just being honest, personally, I would avoid going to events that I know they will be at, even though you should not let them ruin your experience.

MyShadowLove · ‎01-05-2015

@bonnielu wrote:

Hubby and I try very hard and do not give up. We are involved in an activity that we frequent to learn more about. It is a form of dance. We simply don't know how to give up since we meet all kind of nice people while we are doing it. About a month ago we traveled out of our area, paid for two nights at a hotel just to participate. We took our lessons (paid big bucks for that too) and two of the participants were very rude to us. In no simple words told us we were not good enough to continue since we had failed in the past. I kid you not. I was speechless and since I am a retired school teacher who never gave up on anyone I was devastated. Seems they continued to spred the word and made us uncomfortable for the weekend.

I guess I am venting but hopefully someone might have advice for the next time around when we encounter the same fun couple.

@bonnielu ...My husband and I would be sure to twirl and gyrate in front of this "fun couple"..lol...(love your description of them)... and continue to enjoy our dancing activity!...You just show them that you most definitely intend to continue enjoying yourselves!

If I'm understanding correctly, you are involved in a dancing class...I was just curious as to why you had to travel out of your area and what did this "fun couple" mean when they said that you had "failed in the past"?....They have definitely failed miserably in their socialization skills!!!

You just continue enjoying what you love to do and don't allow anyone's rudenesss and ugliness to take that away from you!...They must be such a thrill out on that dance floor! LOL

~~Formerly known as "WildFlowers"~~

occasionalrain · ‎03-10-2010

There are two sides to every story and we are getting only the OP's.

We don't know if this is ballroom, square, or line dancing. If it's square or line and the OP and her husband keep messing it up, I can't blame this couple for getting frustrated and annoyed; they paid big bucks too.

I've been in classes where there has been someone taking more than their share of attention and time from the instructor while forcing others wait to move on.

If this is the case than, while the couple was rude, so was the OP for ruining the class for the others.

There is nothing to admire about persevering at the expense of others.

Suzeecat · ‎05-05-2010

@occasionalrain wrote:
There are two sides to every story and we are getting only the OP's.
We don't know if this is ballroom, square, or line dancing. If it's square or line and the OP and her husband keep messing it up, I can't blame this couple for getting frustrated and annoyed; they paid big bucks too.
I've been in classes where there has been someone taking more than their share of attention and time from the instructor while forcing others wait to move on.
If this is the case than, while the couple was rude, so was the OP for ruining the class for the others.
There is nothing to admire about persevering at the expense of others.

Good point, @occasionalrain , I haven't done square dancing so I didn't think of that.

Kitlynn · ‎03-09-2010

There will always be someone who is critical of someone else. You have to just know that their opinion doesn't matter. It is only important that you are doing something you enjoy and don't let others spoil it for you. People like that are unhappy with themselves and so they strike out at others trying to make them feel better. Just dance like no one is watching and enjoy every moment!!

AuntG · ‎03-09-2010

Me thinks OP puts this gripe out here annually.

GingerPeach · ‎03-12-2010

@AuntG wrote:
Me thinks OP puts this gripe out here annually.

Like @AuntG says, I know we've seen this before.

Did it happen with a new class or is this the same comment about the original class? Either way, the OP had good and useful advice last time around, too.

[was Homegirl] Love to be home . . . thus the screen name. Joined 2003.

Isobel Archer · ‎04-04-2015

@Suzeecat wrote:
@occasionalrain wrote:
There are two sides to every story and we are getting only the OP's.
We don't know if this is ballroom, square, or line dancing. If it's square or line and the OP and her husband keep messing it up, I can't blame this couple for getting frustrated and annoyed; they paid big bucks too.
I've been in classes where there has been someone taking more than their share of attention and time from the instructor while forcing others wait to move on.
If this is the case than, while the couple was rude, so was the OP for ruining the class for the others.
There is nothing to admire about persevering at the expense of others.
Good point, @occasionalrain , I haven't done square dancing so I didn't think of that.

Even if it's ballroom, poor dancers can impede the flow of dance - e.g. waltz/foxtrot etc which moves around the floor. Or they can dance into or step on someone and sometimes ths can be dangerous - I've seen people fall as a result.

We have seen this complaint before - at least twice. I've recommended before that they take private lessons. Then they can get all lthe attention/time/instruction they need and then they can move to a group setting.