Can't get ex-husband out of my mind - Page 9

JobGirl · ‎12-30-2010

@Hondagirl wrote:
We bought a beach house at the Jersey Shore three years before he left. Had no idea this would have happened. Things were great and we fixed up this adorable house and it was great weekends and vacation there. Once he left the primary home in 2001 and said he didn't have anyone I found woman's things at the shore house when I was there alone on vacation since we both still owned it. Finally found out who this woman was from neighbors on the street and he worked with her. I was hurt and bitter. This piece of ****** was at the beach house and would leave her beauty products and some clothing. More hurt for me but I still went to the beach house on vacation since we shared the time. Eventually my ex- wanted me out of the beach house and would give me the house I still lived in. I was not happy about that since I loved the jersey shore and my Mom was still living there within walking distance. He was on my case about this for quite some time and I knew the girlfriend wanted this also - she is a gold digger and wanted the beach house for her and him. I finally had to give in when hurricane Sandy ruined the house with 4 feet of water inside and the house had to torn down. This was very costly and if I stayed in partners with him I would have to come up with several thousand to take it down. So I lost my beach house that I loved dearly... So now he built another beautiful house and that piece of ****** is there with him living the life I worked so hard for. Lots of memories for me and hard to walk away. Those were my dreams - now they are hers...

Do people in your life know you feel this way?

I can't help thinking Betty Broderick scenario here this has been eating at you so long

You seem consumed by this way too many years later

Again she is not living YOUR dreams she is living iwith the nightmare you had for a husband who would most likely do it to you again shoudl he take you back

Either that or you didn't acknowldge your marriage was not what you wanted to believe it was-and he sent signals and you were living in your happy marriage fantasy -

Big Sister · ‎05-15-2010

@hondagirl I do know that it would have been easier on you if he had died.

I wonder if it would be easier for you to move on if you actually forgave him for what he did to you. Think about it, please.

lovesrecess · ‎03-14-2010

Rejection is the most painful of all human emotions. I know exactly how you are feeling because I went through the same thing. Find a church or synagogue in your area; many have support groups or a staff member who is a counselor. It helped me tremendously. Just talking it out is really helpful. There is nothing wrong with you.

elated · ‎06-09-2010

You do realize that you were married for 33 years and have now spent 16 more years consoling yourself. I know this sounds strange but are you suicidal? I can't see someone being so depressed and never contemplating this action.

You should have confronted your ex and then walked away knowing that you expressed yourself. Instead you are torturing yourself. Maybe you need to sell your home and get a fresh start.