Among Friends

[Catty2]

That was mean.  The friend may have thought it, but he certainly didn't have to say it.  Words can really hurt sometimes. 

[Freebird633]

Just breaks my heart that people can be so heartless.  Perhaps their mom never told them "if you can't say something NICE don't say anything. Tell your husband to forget and just move on.  He should be so proud of the accomplishment he has made.  I say good for him. 

[chrystaltree]

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@qbetzforreal wrote:

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@chrystaltree wrote:

I swear some of you must have a different definition of forgive than the one I have.  How can you say you forgive that cruel person that person has neither apologized nor asked to be forgiven.  God forgives, we don't havento and even God doesn't forgive unless the person truly regrets and atones for their actions.  There are cruel people in the world and sometimes people speak out of hand thoughtlessly without realizing how their words will be taken.  At any rate, since this was someone your husband knew way back in h.s. and has no relationship with now, those words will sting for a while but he'll be fine. 

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I did not read anywhere on this thread where people said forgive the idiot,   The support to OP has been to write the idiot off as a jerk and continue to support her husband.  I know there was another thread where people were advising an OP to forgive her brother for saying horrible things to her.

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        OP said in her post  " i will forgive you ,but you will answer to a higher power than Me..Thanks  for the ear..Maryanne".  

[KLm]

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@Desertdi wrote:

I was the ONLY small & short person in my entire family of BIG SIX-FOOTERS.    They  called me names my ENTIRE life.......ya know......runt.......shrimp, etc.     I have always found it annoying.    Now, I only have one relative left, and that person STILL can't stop talking about how "sick" I look..............

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I know this post is about weight, but I, too, am short. I had one woman turn to me once and say: oh, I forgot how short you are.

Since  I was unprepared for such an attack....as I'm sure the OP's husband was, I had no response that left me feeling as if I had defended myself.....which is the second reason I felt bad about the comment.  First you insult me, then I beat myself up for taking it.

It took me years to come up with what I wish I'd said that day: "well, I'm tall inside." And that is what I will say if ever insulted again in that manner.

Not much help in response to weight insults.  Hurtful words linger and roll around in our heads, which is why they are so powerful and why small, unkind people use them.  But, Winston Churchill is credited with this quip...I don't know for sure he said it....but I've always appreciated it. I paraphrase: I can lose weight but you will always be a &@$?%#.

[AuntG]

Such a pointless comment for that person to make. Of course your husband's feelings would be hurt. 

[libbyannE]

Going down three sizes is what he should be proud of.  What counts is today! None of us looks like we did in high school. Very few can boast that they have lost weight, as your husband has. I am impressed just reading about his accomplishment.

[viva923]

Words can hurt more than a slap.

you can not take back words.  The high school friend was a total moron. 

You give your sweet love an extra love, extra hug, extra kiss and know you struck gold when you got him. 

[debcakes]

I can definitely empathize with your husband. I remember going to the doctor after losing 20 pounds. I thought she would be happy, but since I had both gained and lost the 20 since last being there, she just said,"you need to lose weight". 

[ECBG]

I have seen rampent ignorance before.  I am truly sorry.  

Sometimes it's best to put something like this behind you and move on.

[NAES1]

@Keeper of the koi, sweet friend,

  I, too have long loved the beautiful person and his extraordinarily supreme voice and music. 

  Listening to him brings me understanding of a pleasure, a place that few will ever know.  How exciting to hear you speak of him with such joy. My home is filled with lovely music and Devine teachings from our Lord. 

I had come to express my interest in your respective community concerning your brief encounter of someone on the wrong track for giving back, (the man that was so unkind), but saw " IZ" and had to tell you how much I appreciate his gift to the world, especially ours. 

NAES with a big hug and a soft ~