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Valued Contributor
Posts: 860
Registered: ‎10-05-2012

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

[ Edited ]

I was brought up never to ask for favors. I had a co-worker - the branch manager - who was so cheap, he would take toilet paper from the public restrooms at work. And he pulled week old chicken wings out of the trash at work and ate them....I was cleaning out the refrigerator. 

 

We have neighbors, who if they see we get something new, are always asking what we are going to do with the old stuff or if we have stuff we are giving away...they don't offer to purchase anything. Financially, they are doing ok. It gets to me, especially if it's a big ticket item like a paid off used car.  One neighbor's grandson "bought" a car from my BF (thru his grabdmother) for $500 and my BF never got the money. The grandson ended up selling it to another relative. 

 

I think it depends on how you were raised and maybe your age, as to whether or not you find this behavior offensive. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,570
Registered: ‎03-15-2014

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

Just tell him or her that you don't have an extra DVD player.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,781
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

The only reason your co-worker knew is because you told them.  In some conversation you must of been bragging that you have several stored in your basement or how else would they have known.

 

Usually, stuff stored in the basement is just that, stuff and has little to no value.

 

You know with old DVD players, the connections are a lot different with the newer TV's and they probably won't work without some kind of adapters.

 

I'm a person who if you don't ask, you don't know but so sweat the small stuff.

 

 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,024
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

I worked with a co-worker like that. In fact she wanted me to give her my combination VHS and DVD player. Not sure why she wanted me to give it to her. It is not like she needed it. I think just the fact I had one and she didn't.

 

She was so forgetful when it came to work stuff. BUT she kept track of the DVD's I had, or gift cards I was given etc. I learned not early enough not to "lend" her DVD's because I would never see them again, no matter how many times I would ask for them. She would even go through my handbag and my coat pockets. 

 

I am glad you said no. And I would have too. What makes her think you should supply her with items she could easily and cheaply get on her own.

 

 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,568
Registered: ‎06-10-2015

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

Yes it is wrong, wrong, wrong.  Dont feel badly telling this person that you will sell them one for a  reasonable price, but you are not giving them to anyone.  What a rude person they are.

The only thing that stays the same is that everything changes.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,568
Registered: ‎06-10-2015

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

@drizzellla.............she went thru your purse and your pockets!!!!! What a rude woman and thief.  I hope you have put a stop to it.

The only thing that stays the same is that everything changes.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,537
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

I feel like this comes under the category of social graces - inappropriate.

 

I knew somebody who would see things in my house and ask if she could borrow them.    Who does that!?!    I can't even imagine being so tacky as to do that, and it sounds the same as the person mentioned in the OP.

 

What made it worse was that she was somebody who was very careless.   I did loan some things like DVD sets to her and they would come back all jumbled up, not stuck on those plastic things, and just scratching up against each other in the case.

 

At that point, I stopped saying yes.    So, I guess the moral of the story is that there is a point to which one decides to stop saying yes - or maybe not.  That's up to each individual.   

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,024
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

[ Edited ]

@Imaoldhippie wrote:

@drizzellla.............she went thru your purse and your pockets!!!!! What a rude woman and thief.  I hope you have put a stop to it.


I had gone grocery shopping at lunch. And put all the change from the grocery into my zipped coat pocket. Then on the way home from work, I stopped for gas. I went in to pay for my gas and only had $2.00 in my pocket. So the next day I said to her, that I didn't understand I put over $40.00 in my pocket at lunch but on the way home when I went to pay for my gas I only had $2.00. I said to her, I don't understand how that could happen. 

 

My co-worker's desk was 5 feet from mine. And she said she thought it was a single mom in the office that was trying to get by on her starting salary. This single mom worked on the other side of the building and never went into our office.

 

Then my co-worker complained to me. I apparently had washed my hands but not dried them well. And I went into my purse. She complained to me that when she went into my purse, her hands got wet.!?!?!?!? I asked her why she felt she had to go through my purse, she didn't have an answer.  I told my boss about that one. But of course nothing was said.

 

Ha! Ha! I put a stop to it. I retired. Haven't spoken to her since.

PS - When she started I treated her to lunch, once or twice a week. And she expected me to continue treating her to lunch until I retired. I also on occasion had to drive all over town on my lunch hour to jump the battery in her car. Since they leased their cars, she was not about to buy a new battery. 

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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,944
Registered: ‎07-01-2012

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

No. You are not being petty or over reacting.

The item belongs to you and you do not have to explain yourself to anyone.

Firmly say no.

Do not apologize for anything.

It is not an office issue nor an office situation and do not engage in conversation making it one.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,126
Registered: ‎06-21-2011

Re: Can Someone Answer My Question, Please.

I think I did not explain well enough.  It's NOT ME that was asked.  It's someone telling me that they are going to ask a co-worker.  I did not think that was okay.  This is what I'm trying to find out.