Attended a “Sprinkle” Advice Needed!!

NicksmomESQ · ‎08-19-2014

A couple of weeks ago DH & I attended a Sprinkle for a friend’s daughter.She is about to give birth to her second girl.The event was held in a private dining room in a local restaurant.It was a lovely party.There was a lavish buffet,a Viennese table & an open bar.The party was hosted by the BFF & mother of the mom to be.

We sat at a table with other friends.We all gave generous gift cards as we were told “they have everything “.

A few days after the event.I got an email from my friend asking me to send her a check in the amount of $58.35 to cover the cost of our meals, drinks,& tip!!! About the same time my cell phone blew up with texts from my other friends that attended.

We are all angry as heck.We called our friend individually & her response was pathetic. She said”The party was very expensive.It was more than we could afford.You should be willing to help out.To make my daughter happy!!”. No mention was ever made in the invitations that we would be going Dutch!!

I had breakfast this morning with my friends who attended the Sprinkle. None of us has written any checks. We are all upset by this.Our friend, refuses to let it go.She keeps texting & calling us asking for the money.So far we have not taken her calls.We Let our machines answer.

DH is suggesting that we send her a check & tell her that this closes the chapter on our friendship!! We’re seriously considering it!!

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@NicksmomESQ wrote:
A couple of weeks ago DH & I attended a Sprinkle for a friend’s daughter.She is about to give birth to her second girl.The event was held in a private dining room in a local restaurant.It was a lovely party.There was a lavish buffet,a Viennese table & an open bar.The party was hosted by the BFF & mother of the mom to be.
We sat at a table with other friends.We all gave generous gift cards as we were told “they have everything “.
A few days after the event.I got an email from my friend asking me to send her a check in the amount of $58.35 to cover the cost of our meals, drinks,& tip!!! About the same time my cell phone blew up with texts from my other friends that attended.
We are all angry as heck.We called our friend individually & her response was pathetic. She said”The party was very expensive.It was more than we could afford.You should be willing to help out.To make my daughter happy!!”. No mention was ever made in the invitations that we would be going Dutch!!
I had breakfast this morning with my friends who attended the Sprinkle. None of us has written any checks. We are all upset by this.Our friend, refuses to let it go.She keeps texting & calling us asking for the money.So far we have not taken her calls.We Let our machines answer.
DH is suggesting that we send her a check & tell her that this closes the chapter on our friendship!! We’re seriously considering it!!

I agree. Tell her you simply cannot afford friends who decide how your money will be spent.

judy0330 · ‎01-03-2011

WOW! Just when I thought I'd heard it all! I agree with your husband.

sheilababe · ‎08-04-2013

Wow! That's beyond rude and tacky. And people gave gift cards that were probably very nice amounts. I wouldn't pay and would have to end the friendship.

It's the little things.

vermint · ‎04-05-2010

@NicksmomESQI wouldn't even send a check...just end the friendship! In the 1st place, they shouldn't have given a party they couldn't afford. In the 2nd place, if they felt they "must" give this expensive party, the invitations should have been sent stating that the food was "Dutch Treat" or whatever the current phrase is.

That way, since the mother-to-be doesn't "need anything", you could have skipped the gift card (or decreased the amount) and used that to pay for your meal.

The nerve of some people!

dex · ‎03-09-2010

Tell her that you can't afford it either and you shouldn't have attended.

threecees · ‎09-22-2017

I would not give her a penny more. You already gave a gift!

None of this is your responsibility.

Peaches McPhee · ‎04-19-2010

Holy Moly! What a story!

I would not pay up, and let the friendship chips fall where they may. I would tell this to the hostess, though, and ask her to stop asking for $$.

-- pro-aging --

Rochester, New York

excpa · ‎09-12-2015

Not only would I not send a check, I would try to stop payment on the "gift" card. Clearly, if they had "everything" they would have no need of my money and could pay for their own lavish party. Of course, I would dump this person. I doubt I would find the need to explain.

q-girl · ‎10-05-2011

@NicksmomESQ wrote:
A couple of weeks ago DH & I attended a Sprinkle for a friend’s daughter.She is about to give birth to her second girl.The event was held in a private dining room in a local restaurant.It was a lovely party.There was a lavish buffet,a Viennese table & an open bar.The party was hosted by the BFF & mother of the mom to be.
We sat at a table with other friends.We all gave generous gift cards as we were told “they have everything “.
A few days after the event.I got an email from my friend asking me to send her a check in the amount of $58.35 to cover the cost of our meals, drinks,& tip!!! About the same time my cell phone blew up with texts from my other friends that attended.
We are all angry as heck.We called our friend individually & her response was pathetic. She said”The party was very expensive.It was more than we could afford.You should be willing to help out.To make my daughter happy!!”. No mention was ever made in the invitations that we would be going Dutch!!
I had breakfast this morning with my friends who attended the Sprinkle. None of us has written any checks. We are all upset by this.Our friend, refuses to let it go.She keeps texting & calling us asking for the money.So far we have not taken her calls.We Let our machines answer.
DH is suggesting that we send her a check & tell her that this closes the chapter on our friendship!! We’re seriously considering it!!

@NicksmomESQ. . . . I would absolutely answer her calls. I would very sweetly and kindly offer to send her the check for $58.35 to cover the cost of your meals, drinks and tips . . . . as soon as you receive HER check in the amount of whatever YOUR gift to her daughter was, because, after all, the gift was very generous. You really couldn't afford that gift for a "Sprinkle" for a second child, but you just wanted to make her daughter happy. IMO, fair is fair.

Hugs. . .