Among Friends

[sabatini]

@hckynutjohn, thought this might be a good time to tell you something. Back when I first saw you posting, I thought you were a country boy.

I thought your nic stood for hickory nuts.

[hckynutjohn]

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@sabatini wrote:

@hckynutjohn, thought this might be a good time to tell you something. Back when I first saw you posting, I thought you were a country boy.

I thought your nic stood for hickory nuts.

@sabatini 

With me "anytime" is a good time. 🙂

Well! There are some that consider Nebraska to be a "hick" state, which I could be considered to be a "country boy"!  Anyways, over the years I have been here, there are many others that thought my nic was a nut(pun intended). Decided to add the net and hockey stick emojis to maybe help some get what my nic actually meant.

The closest I have come, by some I have met, thinking I was a country boy! Are the many that said i looked like Willie Nelson. Others told me George Carlin.

Since the invasion of Ukraine, I have been putting our American Flag. I will put all of them here so you know what I mean.  

Stay well now,

hckynut 🥅🏒  🇺🇸

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[Bri369]

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@CoffeeNut wrote:

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@ECBG wrote:

Before you assume what Andrea told me, you were hardly on our telephone or texts with us as far as I know.

Andrea told me certain things and I posted what I knew "as far as I knew from our discussions".  When Andrea mentioned her treatment, I only knew that treatment for cancer which is a logical assumption.  I did the very best I could while I was reeling from the shock of a post that morning.

Further more, I know what exactly was said to me, and the assumptions made.  Rude is rude.

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The lesson that should be learned is to never post assumptions about a fellow poster's health condition.  Assumptions are just that and lead to misinformation.  It's not ethical. 

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@CoffeeNut 

You are absolutely correct.  I think it was terrible that her daughter had to come here and clear up the misinformation.  

And no apology was given by that poster for spreading false information.  

[Lucky Charm]

For G-d's sake, the daughter posted on the thread that shared the news that there was 'miscommunication'.  And said that in the grand scheme of things it didn't really matter, but she wanted to clear it up.

It wasn't done in a malicious way.  ECBG misunderstood what Andrea was telling her.  Andrea contacted ECBG and obviously ECBG didn't PRY or ASK Andrea outright so she 'understood it to be kidney cancer'. 

If chemo was mentioned, most of us know that it's not just a treatment for cancer.  It was a misunderstanding.

People will go on and on about this part of it, but did they bother to offer their condolences to Andrea's daughter or at least give her a heart?

Geez.

[kate2357]

@Lucky Charm wrote:

For G-d's sake, the daughter posted on the thread that shared the news that there was 'miscommunication'.  And said that in the grand scheme of things it didn't really matter, but she wanted to clear it up.

It wasn't done in a malicious way.  ECBG misunderstood what Andrea was telling her.  Andrea contacted ECBG and obviously ECBG didn't PRY or ASK Andrea outright so she 'understood it to be kidney cancer'. 

If chemo was mentioned, most of us know that it's not just a treatment for cancer.  It was a misunderstanding.

People will go on and on about this part of it, but did they bother to offer their condolences to Andrea's daughter or at least give her a heart?

Geez.

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@Lucky Charm 

ITA, I do not think there was a malicious intent regarding Andrea's situation. And I will raise my hand to say I did not know chemo wasn't just for cancer treatment. The other comment, is we don't always pass along bad personal information to others, even our friends. I know people who've said they got a great comp package when let go (due to downsizing or whatever) when to you and I, that comp package may not have been great. Could be they didn't want to sound negative or could be they just didn't think that information was anyone else's biz. Don't know.

@hckynutjohn 

I also thought your nic was for hickory nut ... lol. Hockey never crossed my mind. Now I know.

@Junebug54 

You've apologized for whatever you may have written and I hope you will forgive yourself for any harshness you may have written. 

[ECBG]

@kate2357 @Lucky Charm 

Thank you for clearing this up, Ladies.

As it happens, from the beginning I had been in communication with Andrea's DH and Megan to give them awareness and how to navigate the forums, and how Andrea's posts might help with closure when the time presented itself.

[ECBG]

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@Bri369 wrote:

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@CoffeeNut wrote:

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@ECBG wrote:

Before you assume what Andrea told me, you were hardly on our telephone or texts with us as far as I know.

Andrea told me certain things and I posted what I knew "as far as I knew from our discussions".  When Andrea mentioned her treatment, I only knew that treatment for cancer which is a logical assumption.  I did the very best I could while I was reeling from the shock of a post that morning.

Further more, I know what exactly was said to me, and the assumptions made.  Rude is rude.

---

----------------

The lesson that should be learned is to never post assumptions about a fellow poster's health condition.  Assumptions are just that and lead to misinformation.  It's not ethical. 

---

@CoffeeNut 

You are absolutely correct.  I think it was terrible that her daughter had to come here and clear up the misinformation.  

And no apology was given by that poster for spreading false information.  

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@Bri369 

@coffeenut 

As I said ladies, I had been on the phone with the family and on texts hours after Andrea passed, and told them of the misinformation when they shared what happened and had already made my apology.

Megan was kind enough to come here, in her grief no less, to let the posters know what happened to her mother because, again, so there is no miss reading; I let her know.

Megan wanted to come here to begin with, because she knew Andrea enjoyed the board and it kept her company when her DH was on long haul.  She wanted to speak with Andrea's friends; which I can totally see.

Another assumption you made.

[Chi-town girl]

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@Bri369 wrote:

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@CoffeeNut wrote:

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@ECBG wrote:

Before you assume what Andrea told me, you were hardly on our telephone or texts with us as far as I know.

Andrea told me certain things and I posted what I knew "as far as I knew from our discussions".  When Andrea mentioned her treatment, I only knew that treatment for cancer which is a logical assumption.  I did the very best I could while I was reeling from the shock of a post that morning.

Further more, I know what exactly was said to me, and the assumptions made.  Rude is rude.

---

----------------

The lesson that should be learned is to never post assumptions about a fellow poster's health condition.  Assumptions are just that and lead to misinformation.  It's not ethical. 

---

@CoffeeNut 

You are absolutely correct.  I think it was terrible that her daughter had to come here and clear up the misinformation.  

And no apology was given by that poster for spreading false information.  

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I was shocked when I read Megan's 'correction' and thought for sure, given the sensitivity of the matter, the incorrect information would have been revised or removed swiftly.

But the person that posted the erroneous info just continued on..tone deaf! It can still be removed by the moderators if the person who posted it asks the moderators. This would be the respectful thing to do. 

I did not participate on the daily personal photo thread, but I did enjoy sharing and shopping with Andrea on other threads.

[Bri369]

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@ECBG wrote:

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@Bri369 wrote:

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@CoffeeNut wrote:

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@ECBG wrote:

Before you assume what Andrea told me, you were hardly on our telephone or texts with us as far as I know.

Andrea told me certain things and I posted what I knew "as far as I knew from our discussions".  When Andrea mentioned her treatment, I only knew that treatment for cancer which is a logical assumption.  I did the very best I could while I was reeling from the shock of a post that morning.

Further more, I know what exactly was said to me, and the assumptions made.  Rude is rude.

---

----------------

The lesson that should be learned is to never post assumptions about a fellow poster's health condition.  Assumptions are just that and lead to misinformation.  It's not ethical. 

---

@CoffeeNut 

You are absolutely correct.  I think it was terrible that her daughter had to come here and clear up the misinformation.  

And no apology was given by that poster for spreading false information.  

---

@Bri369 

@coffeenut 

As I said ladies, I had been on the phone with the family and on texts hours after Andrea passed, and told them of the misinformation when they shared what happened and had already made my apology.

Megan was kind enough to come here, in her grief no less, to let the posters know what happened to her mother because, again, so there is no miss reading; I let her know.

Megan wanted to come here to begin with, because she knew Andrea enjoyed the board and it kept her company when her DH was on long haul.  She wanted to speak with Andrea's friends; which I can totally see.

Another assumption you made.

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This makes absolutely no sense.  You apologized to the family for giving them misinformation hours after her death.  Yet, you came to this board and repeated the misinformation days afterwards and made no attempt to correct it.  

That's very strange...

[Chi-town girl]

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@CoffeeNut wrote:

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@ECBG wrote:

Before you assume what Andrea told me, you were hardly on our telephone or texts with us as far as I know.

Andrea told me certain things and I posted what I knew "as far as I knew from our discussions".  When Andrea mentioned her treatment, I only knew that treatment for cancer which is a logical assumption.  I did the very best I could while I was reeling from the shock of a post that morning.

Further more, I know what exactly was said to me, and the assumptions made.  Rude is rude.

---

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The lesson that should be learned is to never post assumptions about a fellow poster's health condition.  Assumptions are just that and lead to misinformation.  It's not ethical. 

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Not only was the health information inaccurate.

She posted inaccurate info about the workplace situation and the supposed 'great severance'. Megan felt compelled to post a correction for this too.

I felt empathy and sadness for Megan that she needed to correct inaccurate sensitive personal information posted on an open social board about her Mother. 😢😔😞