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Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,854
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

@Estellee wrote:

@Mom2Dogs wrote:

I would have to send the money directly to my sister's husband and yes both my sister and her husband made it clear to never contact them.

 

Regardless of the money question, I will send a sympathy card.

 

@Mom2Dogs Seems like they made their wishes clear. If it were me, I would send a sympathy card, period.


 


@Estellee   I agree 100%.  A sympathy card is perfect,  and IMO,  enough based on the info given.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,957
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Advice/no judgment

[ Edited ]

Read post # 68.  She's already made her decision and explained why.

 

(Edited to change post number after someone's post was deleted.)

"" A little learning is a dangerous thing."-Alexander Pope
Valued Contributor
Posts: 743
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

They have made it crystal clear they don't want you in their lives and you should abide by that.  If you contact them, it will only cause you grief.  Did anyone in your sister's family contact you about her death or illness, if there was one?  If that answer is no, they have once again shown you that they don't want contact with you or your money.  Let it rest. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,014
Registered: ‎03-19-2010
@MomtoDogs It's sad that our flesh and blood can cause us more hurt and pain then any stranger can. Trust your instinct. I think you know what to do. And I hope that it helps bring you closure to that chapter of your life. The high road always helps bring us peace.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 37,343
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@Mom2Dogs I am so sorry for you.  I went through that 2 years ago--similar but not exactly the same.  While I have faith and believe in doing the right thing, sometimes there will be people you can't change, can't help, can't get anything but grief from and you have to walk away.  

 

That keeps you from being bitter, angry and upset and not being in a frame of mind to help yourself and anyone around you.  Pray about it and let it go, so you can be a blessing to someone you can actually help!  Good thoughs and prayers for you!  Go forth in kindness!  Woman Happy

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,293
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@Mom2Dogs -  thanks for the update on your decision.  Just know that this too shall pass.

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@Mom2Dogs Thanks for the update. I hope you are at peace, it sounds like you are. Take Care of yourself and your family!

Respected Contributor
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@Mom2Dogs - Although I did not see your post in time to respond prior to your making your decision, I think you made the right choice, for all the right reasons. 

 

You have a caring heart, and you have not only mourned the loss of your sister while she was still living and rejected you, you mourned her loss, again, when she became ill and died. You have suffered a lot of pain over the years, due to the unkind actions of your sisters.

 

While you are someone with compassion who gives freely of your heart, you must also be the guardian of your own heart, and take care of yourself, first and foremost. 

 

I am very sorry for your pain. I wish you the very best as you mourn your sister's death, as well as the loss of any hope of a chance for a reconcililaiton with her. You are mourning your sister twice. Go easy on yourself while you process your feelings, and be good to yourself, too. You deserve kindness.

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@ThinkingOutLoud ...........True but in my world never still means never.

LIFE IS TO SHORT TOO FOLD FITTED SHEETS