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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,664
Registered: ‎05-13-2010

I think weddings are about the family, not just the bride and groom.  Discuss your feelings with your son.

Super Contributor
Posts: 279
Registered: ‎07-12-2013

@forest4thetrees wrote:

He is wildly exuberantly passionately in love....found the one person on the whole planet he wishes to spend the rest of his life with!!  What joy!   He'd invite the entire world if he could..just so all can be part of his great happiness.   I can relate.

However, if you feel that some of the names on his list are making you squirm (for whatever reasons there might be) then just sit down and discuss it with him--not necessarily the blow-by-blow; just ask "Johnny, why did you list Mary Lou Smith (or Aunt Grizelda, or whomever)."  Come to a happy medium.  If he has a reason ("I remember she.....") then let the invitation go out.  If he says "I thought you'd like to see....." then discuss removing them from the list.  Or just let him invite the planet and put the choice to attend/miss on the invitee. 

No matter who attends, or doesn't attend, the end result will still be the same.  At the end of the day he and the woman of his dreams will have a lovely memory to the start of their lives together.


 

I love❤️💚💛💙💜 your post @forest4thetrees and I totally agree!

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,951
Registered: ‎04-27-2015

@KarenQVC wrote:

I think weddings are about the family, not just the bride and groom.  Discuss your feelings with your son.


Thank you, I will.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,951
Registered: ‎04-27-2015

@Libbylady wrote:

When each of my 3 sons got married we were given a number of guests we could invite from "our side".  The brides family determined how large/small that number was and we worked within it.

 

Unless the couple is paying for the guests themselves, or they have an unlimited budget ( bless them then ), I don't understand where these"un-close family members and no-longer-close friends" come into play.  For each son's wedding we had to work hard to make our list fit the given number!

 

The only wiggle-room we had was to request that if an RSVP regret from our list came in quickly, we had several held in reserve.  This was fair to both families.

 

One other detail we insisted upon ahead of time was that if any of "our side" had replied that they would come, and then were no-shows at the reception, we would pay for their meals.

I was delighted to see that we had NONE at any of the weddings who didn't show.  I was very proud of my well-bred friends!!

 

 

 

 


I totally agree with the "no show" policy. We definitely will be paying for any of our no shows on our side.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,951
Registered: ‎04-27-2015

@Alsee wrote:

Let your son handle it. If he's old enough to get married, he should be able to compile a guest list. You'll only cause conflict. It's his wedding -


You are right, I would never want to add to the stress of his wedding.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,635
Registered: ‎06-14-2016

I think it depends who is paying for the wedding.

 

Happiness is ALWAYS an inside job,
Don't assign anyone else that much POWER
in your life!!!

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