He is wildly exuberantly passionately in love....found the one person on the whole planet he wishes to spend the rest of his life with!! What joy! He'd invite the entire world if he could..just so all can be part of his great happiness. I can relate.
However, if you feel that some of the names on his list are making you squirm (for whatever reasons there might be) then just sit down and discuss it with him--not necessarily the blow-by-blow; just ask "Johnny, why did you list Mary Lou Smith (or Aunt Grizelda, or whomever)." Come to a happy medium. If he has a reason ("I remember she.....") then let the invitation go out. If he says "I thought you'd like to see....." then discuss removing them from the list. Or just let him invite the planet and put the choice to attend/miss on the invitee.
No matter who attends, or doesn't attend, the end result will still be the same. At the end of the day he and the woman of his dreams will have a lovely memory to the start of their lives together.
When each of my 3 sons got married we were given a number of guests we could invite from "our side". The brides family determined how large/small that number was and we worked within it.
Unless the couple is paying for the guests themselves, or they have an unlimited budget ( bless them then ), I don't understand where these"un-close family members and no-longer-close friends" come into play. For each son's wedding we had to work hard to make our list fit the given number!
The only wiggle-room we had was to request that if an RSVP regret from our list came in quickly, we had several held in reserve. This was fair to both families.
One other detail we insisted upon ahead of time was that if any of "our side" had replied that they would come, and then were no-shows at the reception, we would pay for their meals.
I was delighted to see that we had NONE at any of the weddings who didn't show. I was very proud of my well-bred friends!!
I totally agree with the "no show" policy. We definitely will be paying for any of our no shows on our side.