Among Friends

[jackthebear]

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@tends2dogs wrote:

Wasn't there a long thread about this very subject a week or so ago? 

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there was 

interestingly buy someone who "felt they had to bring something"

[jackthebear]

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@chrystaltree wrote:

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@tends2dogs wrote:

Wasn't there a long thread about this very subject a week or so ago? 

Yes, it comes up all the time.  Honestly, I think giving a gift when someone has requested no gift is one of the rudest and ill mannered things a person can do.   

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I agree, I think everyone writing in, is really lovely and want to bring some kind of present.  However if the host says no gifts, they really mean it. They probably have everything they want and let's face it most of us past 60 are trying to get rid of stuff.

It's also not really paying attention to someone's wishes which is ill-mannered 

[arubakathy]

Thank you for all the replies. OK I get what "no gifts" means. LOL But what I plan on doing is to make a donation to their church in honor of their anniversary. They would be pleased. Thanks again everyone I knew i could count on you all.

[qualitygal]

A bouquet of flowers, the sunnier the better.  

[MoJoV]

We were invited to a "no gifts" anniversary last summer.  I donate to the Arbor Day Foundation and they send me cards saying 2 trees will be planted for whoever I designate,just fill in the names.  Perfect. Everyone wins!

[Bridgegal]

I may be wrong here but I think a donation to whatever is still a gift.  And they said no gifts. 

[Sooner]

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@mac116 wrote:

I understand why people ask about this.  We were invited to a 50th Anniversary dinner party.  The invitation said, "No gifts...", so we didn't bring anything but a card.  Imagine my feelings when I went to fing the place for cards, and I found a table, loaded with gifts as well as a box for cards.  I will NEVER do that again.  I'll bring something  along with a card.

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@mac116 SO, what the guests do is more important and trumps what the HOSTS asked you to do?  That makes absolutely no sense to me.  Comply with the hosts wishes or turn down an invite.  

[mac116]

@Sooner 

You do it your.way, and I'll do it mine.  

[jackthebear]

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@Bridgegal wrote:

I may be wrong here but I think a donation to whatever is still a gift.  And they said no gifts. 

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it's an "all about my gift" and again one that might necessitate a thank you in return 

and again nothing wrong with making a donation, it's really the not paying attention to the wants or requests of the hosts,

[mimomof4]

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@lovesrecess wrote:
You could make a donation to their church, charity, or other cause you know they care about, in honor of their 60th anniversary, and put the notice of that inside the card.

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I would go with what @bowlicious and @lovesrecess suggested and donate in the name of the couple.  Then you are abiding with the couples wishes of no gifts but at the same time taking care of the need you have to gift a gift because you were invited somewhere.

Lets face it.  If a couple has been married 60 years what are they going to do with a bunch of gifts and what do they really need.