topic Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here in Suggestion Box

Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

blankette — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 02:53:18 GMT

WOrse than a playground, how awful it is to post here. It really makes me sick, knowing how they are come out and just pile on people. I see it all the time and I have had it happen to me, it isnt good for business. I wonder how much money some of these people spend here that own your forums, I would love to see just how much they actually support this network withtheir dollars, or if they just have too much time on their hands. It is almost like they keep track of you and stalk. Lets see how many show up here now.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

jaxs mom — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 03:17:33 GMT

I didn't see any bullying in your thread. I didn't post on it, because it was already explained that PTR family has been in jewelry for years. People posting their opinions that happen to disagree with yours aren't bullying. No one called you names.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

PurpleBunny — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 03:22:00 GMT

If there is something upsetting, just avoid the thread or take a break for a few days. There will always be posters that love to mix it up.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

proudlyfromNJ — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 03:33:02 GMT

A different opinion doesn't equal bullying.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Sooner — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 05:05:44 GMT

Sometimes a differing opinion can have some truth in it if one examines it with an open mind. I think that we suffer greatly when we can't have civil discussions and differences of opinions. I think it is frightening beyond words.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

NYC Susan — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 05:26:39 GMT

@blankette wrote:
WOrse than a playground, how awful it is to post here. It really makes me sick, knowing how they are come out and just pile on people. I see it all the time and I have had it happen to me, it isnt good for business. I wonder how much money some of these people spend here that own your forums, I would love to see just how much they actually support this network withtheir dollars, or if they just have too much time on their hands. It is almost like they keep track of you and stalk. Lets see how many show up here now.

I disagree that "it's awful to post here". Most of the time, IMO, it's just fine. In my experience, overwhelmingly most posters are kind, want to be helpful, provide good information, and - many times - make me laugh or smile.

There are always going to be bad apples. That happens everywhere. It's easy enough to ignore the troublemakers. Just scroll on by. There are quite a lot of nice people here. If not, I doubt so many of us would stick around.

It also helps to realize that differing opinions are what forums are all about. If we all agreed, it would be a pretty boring world. I really think you're over-reacting.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Kachina624 — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 07:13:45 GMT

@blankette wrote:
WOrse than a playground, how awful it is to post here. It really makes me sick, knowing how they are come out and just pile on people. I see it all the time and I have had it happen to me, it isnt good for business. I wonder how much money some of these people spend here that own your forums, I would love to see just how much they actually support this network withtheir dollars, or if they just have too much time on their hands. It is almost like they keep track of you and stalk. Lets see how many show up here now.

You must be super sensitive or have a vivid imagination because I don't see that happening here. Once in a while two posters will disagree and things between them get a bit heated but that's not bullying. What do you consider to be bullying?

If someone disagrees with you, simply ignore it or state your case politely, then drop, it. No problem. I think this stalking business is just an overactive imagination on the part of some people. I imagine this is a typical board, tightly patrolled. If this format bothers you, perhaps it's not for you.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Pook — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 09:42:52 GMT

OP's post about wanting QVC to not allow vendors such as PTR to sell his jewelry line (that is selling and is getting great reviews) because he sells skincare was an opinion that most didn't understand and found it overly dramatic. That is not bullying!

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Plaid Pants2 — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 11:46:02 GMT

@Pook wrote:
OP's post about wanting QVC to not allow vendors such as PTR to sell his jewelry line (that is selling and is getting great reviews) because he sells skincare was an opinion that most didn't understand and found it overly dramatic. That is not bullying!

Wait. What?

So, just because PTR is known for his skincare line, and sells his skincare line, he is "forbidden" from having other products (jewelry), and selling those other products on QVC, according to the o/p?

Have I got that right?

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

eyeron — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 12:09:26 GMT

I agree with the OP ....that I have read posts in the past where I felt people were being bullied. But I also think that sometimes it is very hard to "hear" the tone of the words being written. Has anyone ever texted with a friend and you thought that person was angry or annoyed at you (or visa versa)....but really wasn't at all?

I know i didn't participate in that post yesterday.....but I am sorry the OP felt bullied. No one likes to feel that way whether it was intentional or not.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Plaid Pants2 — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 12:11:21 GMT

It isn't "bullying" just because someone disagrees with your opinion.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

violann — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 13:03:13 GMT

blankette, how does your sickness present itself? Since it seems that now a couple incidents directly related to cyber communication are making you sick, would it be worth your while to explore your condition as a health issue?

I get annoyed with people who use highly subjective language, who believe there is only one viable "opinion" for any subject, and who believe that using insulting language is their right when expressing whatever they consider opinions. I can be waspish when I encounter those kinds of things. However annoyed I get though, those kinds of incidents have never made me sick.

Sometimes when you're speaking to an unknown audience you have to frame comments more carefully than when a gang of friends are sitting around having coffee. A comment not intended to be unkind MAY be misinterpreted when seen in print.

If you're finding "...how awful it is to post here" is it worth your comfort and happiness?

Sincere best to you in whatever you decide.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

proudlyfromNJ — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 13:14:56 GMT

@blankette. Well, I have to say, you certainly know what a bully is. Click on your user name and read some of your posts. Maybe you forgot, but they a very eye-opening.

On one thread you call fellow posters "dodos" and "looneys". You rip into some of the hosts with the most horrible words. It's one thing to say you don't like their clothes,makeup,speech,etc, but the things you say are bullying.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

CalminHeart — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 13:15:25 GMT

I sure didn't see any bullying on that other thread. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, even if it isn't the same as yours. A different opinion is not bullying. Don't look for offenses where none exist.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

CalminHeart — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 13:22:04 GMT

There are at least 2 threads from you about this issue. This is not something you can control so why are you stressing over it? You can only control how you react so perhaps that is the first place to start?

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

IMW — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 13:51:18 GMT

Well Said

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Plaid Pants2 — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 14:12:50 GMT

@CalminHeart wrote:
There are at least 2 threads from you about this issue. This is not something you can control so why are you stressing over it? You can only control how you react so perhaps that is the first place to start?

@CalminHeart

Some people are not happy unless they have something to complain about.

And when others don't see things their way, they go running to the mods, whining like a first grader, to tattle on the posters who dared to voice an opposing opinion.

It's just like a first grader running to the teacher and saying, "Teacher! Teacher! They're being mean to me! Waaaaa!"

It shows their immaturity level when they can't even handle an opinion that doesn't agree with theirs.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

jlkz — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 14:51:30 GMT

@eyeron

Your post is right on about perceived tone / intent of the written word, be it online or on paper !!!!!

On one of my early jobs after college, I was a manager in a computer center that operated on three shifts. Since I was assigned to the midnight shift, I wanted to be certain that the other two shifts' supervisors knew what occurred and things we needed for smooth operations. Couldn't be there, so I created an Intershift Notebook.

Well, the first shift supervisor took offense. She saw it as a personal criticism and the environment became " polluted " to say the least. Thank goodness...she was gone a short time later. Our manager liked the Intershift communications and had seen nothing bullying or criticizing about it.

It is very difficult to convey humor or tongue-in-cheek attitude on paper: it's black or white. This why as a career counselor ( third career ), I prefer to hear the person and determine what they are really saying .... or NOT saying.

When I come across the questionable posts here, I just ignore them: I won't waste my time or energy responding because it won't change the basic attitudes.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Pearlee — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 15:08:20 GMT

@blankette wrote:
WOrse than a playground, how awful it is to post here. It really makes me sick, knowing how they are come out and just pile on people. I see it all the time and I have had it happen to me, it isnt good for business. I wonder how much money some of these people spend here that own your forums, I would love to see just how much they actually support this network withtheir dollars, or if they just have too much time on their hands. It is almost like they keep track of you and stalk. Lets see how many show up here now.

@blankette This board is moderated by QVC employees whose moderation enforces QVC's terms of use for posting on this board. If you don't like the posts that the moderators feel are fine to be left up as not violating board terms of use, then maybe it's best you find elsewhere to read and post, since you clearly disagree with QVC's terms of use enforcement.

Re: Do somethng about all the bullies that hang out here

Porcelain — Tue, 21 Feb 2017 18:16:53 GMT

I think sometimes people accidentally use harsh terms as a way to add emphasis to their thoughts. It's hard for me to read them without reacting. It seems provocative, and would be if they said those words to my face. The blanket negative labeling statements like hate or denigrate or sloppy or irresponsible. I don't talk like that and don't stick around those who do.

Over time you realize which posters add in those words and uncharitable judgements in their responses like little skewers or stilettos in otherwise reasonable and even helpful response. (I suspect some of them may be in serious chronic physical pain. Physical pain often affects thoughts and emotions and the way you express yourself.)

If you want to respond to them, filter out anything unloving and respond to the part you appreciate. I often pass them by and overlook their contributions which is a bit sad for me. Decide what types of behavior you allow in your orbit and let everyone else fall away.