topic Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia in Among Friends

Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

house_cat — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 10:30:22 GMT

This is going to sound nutty, and it probably is, but I'm going to say it anyway. DH and I have a new house in a new part of the country, prompting weekend guests twice a month or more. As the holiday season approaches and things get busier and busier at home and at work, I find myself with "lock-down nostalgia". I don't want to disrespect those who suffered mentally, physically or financially, but I'm feeling overwhelmed as things pick up, and nostalgic about those days when I could shut myself in and slow the world down.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

gidgetgh — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 13:20:26 GMT

And I am the opposite. I'm still being very careful because of Covid, but I am way lenient compared to some of my friends who, even fully vaccinated, don't feel comfortable doing anything, even walking for exercise outside with other people. So I can't get together with them.

I have been spending way too much time home alone and I hate it with every fiber of my being.

But I do understand what you're saying @house_cat . Too much company can be overwhelming.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

cotton4me — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 11:12:53 GMT

I hear you. That’s a lot of visiting, having guests every other weekend (and more). I too would find that stressful. I like a certain amount of quiet time.

The thing I notice is more traffic, clogged rush-hours once again. I was trying to get home the other day (before rush hour) and I was caught in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

jackthebear — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 11:24:11 GMT

do you need to have guests just

about every weekend?

sounds like they are using your place to avoid a hotel,

I would not like people coming from all over right now

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

aprilskies — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 11:31:21 GMT

@cotton4me wrote:
I hear you. That’s a lot of visiting, having guests every other weekend (and more). I too would find that stressful. I like a certain amount of quiet time.

The thing I notice is more traffic, clogged rush-hours once again. I was trying to get home the other day (before rush hour) and I was caught in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

@cotton4me Yes! While I wish the circumstances were diffferent, I truly miss the quiet roads. Everyone was staying home. Now everyone is out and back to clogged and congested roads. I enjoyed it while it lasted.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Bri369 — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 11:47:48 GMT

Having overnight guests so often would be like torture to me, especially after working all week. Are you inviting them or are they inviting themselves? At some point, I would have to put my foot down and offer an alternative. I definitely wouldn't be encouraging guests to come and visit.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

SoCal Bred — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 11:44:46 GMT

@jackthebear - wrote:

do you need to have guests just

about every weekend?

sounds like they are using your place to avoid a hotel,

I would not like people coming from all over right now

I agree, if you extended an open invitation people will take advantage, some don't think about the inconvenience it puts on the homeowner, only you can put a halt on these visits that are overwhelming you. Make up excuses, maybe they will get the hint eventually.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Sweetbay magnolia — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 12:04:23 GMT

No, @house_cat , I had a problem with recurring guests (family) even well before the pandemic. Always came when my garden was at it's peak and I enjoyed just being here. I didn't want company, and I detested the idea that just because we were related, their wish was my command!

It was hard but eventually I told them, just no. Find another place to stay but if you do choose to come, it will not be with amenities (no guest bedroom, as snorer husband sleeps there now) and I will pump up the aerobed and you can sleep in the den.

Problem solved. Other "recipents" of her unleashed visitations started making excuses and she got the message, started booking hotels.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Shanus — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 12:56:54 GMT

I have mixed feelings. I almost jumped out of my skin staying in and alone for so many months before the vaccine.

I did go out masked, plastic face shield, gloved, etc. near the end to do some bridal conultations, skincare, etc., but at home limited my visitors to close family members....even were alone for thanksgiving last year. My youngest GD is 10 and not vaccinated yet. Because my DH and I continued to work (even though mine was limited), I stayed masked and required any family to mask up.

We live in the college town where the majority of my family attended, too. Frequently, I get requests to stay here when they all come back to town since they know the entire top floor (4 bedrooms) are vacant. I do limit those visits. I've been spoiled by my privacy at home.

I DO miss less traffic, crowded stores now especially w/ holiday shoppers, waiting in grocery store lines, etc.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

NYCLatinaMe — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 12:06:36 GMT

Hi @house_cat unless those house guests are your children, consider letting them know some of the times when they call to set up the visit that your home is not available. Space out the guests to dates that are convenient to you. You are not compelled to take uninvited guests.

If the roads are too busy for your taste, maybe you are in need of a move?

Alternatively, have you considered whether this is an effect the lockdown had on your mental health? You may want to seek counseling.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

teganslaw — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 12:27:12 GMT

I wouldn't like constant guests since I value privacy. The only difference now is that I can attend events and concerts that were cancelled last year. Otherwise, my life overall hasn't changed much. I still went to dentist appointments and the hair salon (when they reopened.) Have done shopping online for years, except for groceries, where I still went to the stores.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Buffalogal47 — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 12:38:12 GMT

The things I miss about the lockdown are no traffic and few people in the grocery stores. I an an introvert so my life didn't really change all that much. I continued doing Meals on Wheels twice a week, went grocery shopping as usual and as soon as I could, I went to the salon and dental and medical appointments.

As for having overnight guests every weekend, that would be a big NO for me, pandemic or no pandemic. I'm not running a hotel.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

freakygirl — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 12:50:15 GMT

i'm fully vaccinated, but am still choosing to be careful and go out only when i have doctors appointments. i don't miss the way i used to go out before, which was a lot. i somehow just fell easily into lockdown mode and it didn't bother me at all. there's always online shopping for everything i need, so i guess that's why i'm content to stay home.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

On It — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 13:22:18 GMT

@house_cat Tell those who are inviting themselves that you have decided to limit guests in your home. Now that you are getting busier at work, you do not have the time to entertain. I would remind them that COVID is an ongoing threat and not "stranger danger." Anyone could bring a case into your home.

Invite whom you choose, when you choose, and do not feel guilty.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

LindaSal — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 13:53:08 GMT

@house_cat I totally get what you are saying. We did what we had to do through covid as far as groceries, errands, whatever. As far as people staying over I've always kind of frowned upon that. Unless it was my adult kids I was never thrilled with it. Now that we have downsized it has saved us from letting people stay here. I like my privacy too and I really dislike cleaning up after other people! You need to take the reins my friend, there is nothing wrong with the way you feel.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Desertdi — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 14:42:01 GMT

@house_cat When I lived in Los Angeles, I felt like I was running a hotel. I retired in Phoenix....and people were calling ahead to make "winter reservations". Had to tell them I BOUGHT A CASITA, and only have one twin bed......

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Mistreatedbycs — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 15:13:24 GMT

@house_cat

I'm not going to comment on what you are feeling or not feeling but

I sit back and just shake my head, you just moved and there was a thought to move again? Then, you used the word "nutty" loosely, one cannot joke around with words like that and you need profesiional counciling.

I joked around a couple weeks ago and was told I was bitter.

So, unless one knows your personality, every word on here is taken seriously.

I wish you happy new memories in your new home. I hope we never go back to lockdown, that is so against an individuals freedom to live in a free country.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Sooner — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 15:19:44 GMT

Just say no. Simple.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

Jk9 — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 17:03:16 GMT

@house_cat My husband and I live on 20 acres of land in a country setting and our lives didn't change a lot with the pandemic (except for infection control habits such as masking and sanitizing). Not everyone enjoys being socially active and "going". I am reclusive and that supports my mental health instead of straining it. I choose to have limited social contact with others. In fact, I put a halt to a relationship with a wealthy socially prominent man because I didn't want that "life style" when I was younger. I see nothing wrong with discovering that you like more solitude. Perhaps you and DH (if he agrees with you) should communicate your feelings about the weekend visits.

Re: Experiencing Lock-Down Nostalgia

house_cat — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 22:34:10 GMT

Thanks for the feedback and advice. The guests we are having are people we love dearly. Although it is sometimes overwhelming, I assume it will slow down once the novelty wears off. We spent 20 years living very far from our east coast family and friends, so everyone is happy that we are in driving distance. I should also mention that everyone visiting has been fully vaccinated.. most of us have also had the booster.

I"m an introvert, so the continuous socializing takes its toll on me rather quickly, especially since I have very busy days full of children and adults.

@Mistreatedbycs

I'm not sure what you were trying to say. I don't think that describing myself as "nutty" should indicate a need for psychological intervention. Also, we moved here this past June and have no intention of relocating, so I'm not sure where you got the idea that I'm planning another move.