topic Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean? in Among Friends

Analytical Question - What does this mean?

RinaRina — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:04:19 GMT

I was watching a Netflix movie about the history of unions & the mafia ("The Irishman"). There's a part in the movie where Jimmy Hoffa (Al Pacino) says to Sheeran (Robert DeNiro), "if someone is late for a meeting, then, they don't respect you."

THAT BOTHERED ME because I had a meeting scheduled (at an unspecified time) with an upper level manager on Tuesday about something that happened on the job. I suggested she meet with the other two people first and then meet with me and she complied. It was already late ... close to 5:45 PM.

At 6:15PM, I ran into her in the hall and asked if "now is okay".

She said "no" because she'd just finished up with the first "two people", but had to meet with another team because they had an emergency with another team member. (That team member had already told me earlier (in confidence) she was turning in her "notice".)

I did NOT want to stay after 6:30 PM, so, I said, "okay we can talk tomorrow".

She said she couldn't because she was going out of town for Thanksgiving.

I said, "okay, then, I'll see you when you get back."

I thought I was being nice .. and agreeable. THEN I SAW THE MOVIE and that line stuck with me.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

Sheila P-Burg — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:09:39 GMT

@RinaRina .... How can you be late for a meeting that has an "unspecified" time?

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

RinaRina — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:22:11 GMT

@Sheila P-Burg wrote:

@RinaRina .... How can you be late for a meeting that has an "unspecified" time?

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My meeting did NOT occur. The window of time available was very short ....The manager showed up at the facility around 5:45PM, and we close at 6:30PM. Personally, I consider that poor time management. But in the movie, Jimmy Hoffa called it "a lack of respect".

However, I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. If it's Thanksgiving week and you're swamped and overscheduled .... then okay.

As I said, I thought I was being polite and agreeable. Then, I saw the movie ... and felt I was a low priority. It's kind of insulting to tell someone you're going to meet with them ... and then, run out of time .. and can't.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

CrazyDaisy — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:17:23 GMT

I don't see the connection either.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

CrazyDaisy — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:20:30 GMT

@RinaRina wrote:
@Sheila P-Burg wrote:

@RinaRina .... How can you be late for a meeting that has an "unspecified" time?
==================================

My meeting did NOT occur. The window of time availabe was very short ....The manager showed up at the facility around 5:45PM, and we close at 6:30PM. Personally, I consider that poor time management. But in the movie, Jimmy Hoffa called it "a lack of respect".
However, I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. If it's Thanksgiving week and you're swamped and overscheduled .... then okay.
As I said, I thought I was being polite and agreeable. Then, I saw the movie ... and felt I was a low priority.

Actually sounds like something more important needed attention. Management often needs to prioritize time and resources, some issues are low priority.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

x Hedge — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:22:33 GMT

If the day is specified, but not the time, I would've made myself available for whatever time that day was convenient to the manager.

You didn't.

She asked to meet with you earlier, but you dodged it.

Now it becomes incumbent upon you to wait.

Even if that means after 6:30.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

Love my grandkids — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:23:53 GMT

@RinaRina IMO it's a line in a movie (which I've watched) and nothing more.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

RinaRina — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:24:43 GMT

@CrazyDaisy wrote:

Actually sounds like something more important needed attention. Management often needs to prioritize time and resources, some issues are low priority.

=========================

Okay. You got my point, and answered my question.

I was a "low-priority" in her book.

Fine with me!

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

CrazyDaisy — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:26:54 GMT

@RinaRina wrote:
@CrazyDaisy wrote:

Actually sounds like something more important needed attention. Management often needs to prioritize time and resources, some issues are low priority.
=========================

Okay. You got my point, and answered my question.
I was a "low-priority" in her book.
Fine with me!

I didn't say "you" were the low priority, however the issue may have been.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

x Hedge — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:31:21 GMT

"It's kind of insulting to tell someone you're going to meet with them ... and then, run out of time .. and can't."

Yes, and that's just what you did.

Not only that, but you made your meeting into a leftover 'to-do' task, that now has to be moved into rotation with the new week's 'to-do' list.

Very annoying.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

RinaRina — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:34:50 GMT

@x Hedge wrote:

She asked to meet with you earlier, but you dodged it. < NOT TRUE>

Now it becomes incumbent upon you to wait.
Even if that means after 6:30.

===================================

Sorry I did not make that clear in the original message.

I should've said, it had been pre-arranged before I went to work .... that she would meet with the other 2 people first, then me.

However, I understand your point about staying after 6:30PM.

Basically, you're saying, if I wanted to meet that badly, then I should've been willing to stay after 6:30PM.

I hate to sound unreasonable, but if I'm such a "low-priority", why should I?

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

RinaRina — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:40:37 GMT

@Love my grandkids wrote:
@RinaRina IMO it's a line in a movie (which I've watched) and nothing more.

================================================================

BTW, how did you like the movie? I haven't finished yet, but I'm really enoying it.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

kaydee50 — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:38:57 GMT

@RinaRina You are not Jimmy Hoffa and you are not talking about the Mafia. It is a movie. I don't think your manager was being "disrepectful" to you. Don't take movie talk so seriously!!!

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

millieshops — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 22:50:04 GMT

@RinaRina Within the Mafia, they had their own language. I'm guessing that if someone had been told to show up at a particular time and didn't, the Don might put out a marker on the slackard. They didn't need much reason to do away with someone of a lower status. Can't imagine your company runds like the Mafia.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

luvmybeetle — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 23:03:48 GMT

I would like to comment on the movie. I just watched it yesterday and thought it was very interesting. I didn't like the bad language but that's the way they talked. My father talked like that too. All this happened during my teenage years and I remember when Hoffa went missing. Since we have no proof of how Hoffa died, this was very believable. The Frank Sheeran (Robert DeNiro) character, I kind of felt sorry for him. He had to kill his good friend. But, we don't know if it's true. Also, I think if you are late for an appointment you are being rude. I have always tried to be prompt or early to my appointments.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

Allegheny — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 23:04:11 GMT

Back in the day when that movie would have taken place, I agree it would have been a measure of disrespect to be late for a one-on-one meeting or even a group meeting.

Today it is almost considered "no big deal" to be late or even a no show for appointments. Many times without even a courtesy phone call.

Personally I still consider it inconsiderate, however I understand and accept certain circumstances.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

ECBG — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 23:17:31 GMT

Set a meeting for a certain time or there can't be total results.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

Sheila P-Burg — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 23:18:12 GMT

I will give you one sound piece of advice. Before you meet with your "upper management" make sure you have the right attitude.

Just because they had to deal with another problem and didn't take the time to talk to you right then does not mean they thought of you as "low priority" just that the problem they needed to address might have been of " higher priority ". Sounds like they were trying to take care of as much as possible so they could enjoy the holiday.

The question is ..... Could what you needed to discuss with "upper management" wait a few more days?

And to answer your question ..... I have always thought it disrespectful when someone is late for a meeting or interview UNLESS they have a legitimate reason and gives notice of the reason for the "lateness" as soon as possible.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

Nonametoday — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 23:41:41 GMT

@RinaRina wrote:
I was watching a Netflix movie about the history of unions & the mafia ("The Irishman"). There's a part in the movie where Jimmy Hoffa (Al Pacino) says to Sheeran (Robert DeNiro), "if someone is late for a meeting, then, they don't respect you."

THAT BOTHERED ME because I had a meeting scheduled (at an unspecified time) with an upper level manager on Tuesday about something that happened on the job. I suggested she meet with the other two people first and then meet with me and she complied. It was already late ... close to 5:45 PM.
At 6:15PM, I ran into her in the hall and asked if "now is okay".
She said "no" because she'd just finished up with the first "two people", but had to meet with another team because they had an emergency with another team member. (That team member had already told me earlier (in confidence) she was turning in her "notice".)

I did NOT want to stay after 6:30 PM, so, I said, "okay we can talk tomorrow".
She said she couldn't because she was going out of town for Thanksgiving.
I said, "okay, then, I'll see you when you get back."

I thought I was being nice .. and agreeable. THEN I SAW THE MOVIE and that line stuck with me.

@RinaRina

My mother told me that all our life together, that being late is disrespecting other people's time, making it appear that you think you are more important than they are, so if you are late for an appointment, it reflects poorly on you. I try never to be late. She said stealing time is like stealing valuable goods because people's time is valuable.

Re: Analytical Question - What does this mean?

RinaRina — Sat, 30 Nov 2019 23:43:46 GMT

@luvmybeetle wrote:
. Also, I think if you are late for an appointment you are being rude. I have always tried to be prompt or early to my appointments.

======================================

My sentiments exactly. I've never been in "upper management", but I'd still try to be on time for appointments and keep the ones I've made. I'm funny about "time management issues. Unless you're stuck in traffic -- then no excuses!