topic Re: Birth announcement Question in Among Friends

Birth announcement Question

Kitty Galore — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 18:47:44 GMT

I received a birth announcement from a good friends daughter , my friends granddaughter. I have never actually met her daughter when she was growing up we lived in a different state, the daughter now lives in another state so I won't be seeing her. Her mother and I have been friend since the 3rd grade. My question is are these types of announcements just typically sent and one Is expected to send a gift or just to share a picture of the baby? I have seen photos of the baby since she was born from my friend. Any thoughts ??

Re: Birth announcement Question

nyc1 — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 18:54:22 GMT

@Kitty Galore That is such an individual decision, but if you and your friend are really good friends and you've known her since the 3rd grade, I personally would send a gift. It's a gift that celebrates your friend's joy and your happiness for her.

I had the SAME THING happen about 5 years ago. My girlfriend since the 7th grade (we were best friends for many many years) let me know that her son, whom I never met (she has lived in a different State since we were in our early 20s) had a baby..... her first grandchild. I was THRILLED for her, and sent a gift. My friend was so appreciative.

Re: Birth announcement Question

Fressa — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 18:55:34 GMT

Our nieces and nephews are adults now and have children of their own. We started to get the same thing a couple of years ago. I think the purpose of this is to receive a gift. We have not seen any of these kids because they live on the other coast. Thank heavens I had the presence of mind to stop the engagement gifts, shower gifts after the first baby, etc. or we would be broke. My husband comes from a large family and mine is very small. Very few of the these kids even let you know they received the check/gift and no one sends or texts a "thank you". I just put the announcemnent in the photo album and am done with it. None of them ever acknoweldge our son and grandson. Families.....they give me a migraine.

Re: Birth announcement Question

PinkyPetunia — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 19:04:16 GMT

You can respond to the birth announcement as you wish. If you have never met your friend's daughter I see no reason to send a gift. You might send a greeting card if you are so inclined. Do whatever you are comfortable with.

Re: Birth announcement Question

RetRN — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 19:10:51 GMT

I don't honestly think a gift is expected, it is a personal choice whether or not you choose to send one.

Re: Birth announcement Question

Jordan2 — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 19:12:22 GMT

Speaking for myself, if I was good friends with the new mom's grandmother since she sent a birth announcement I would send a gift. You give what you can afford, I would definitely send a card congratulating her on the new baby.

Re: Birth announcement Question

BirkiLady — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 19:15:02 GMT

Obviously your friend gave her daughter your address (for the birth announcement to be mailed). How uncomfortable! Do you know if the couple are financially stable? If so, I would simply send a nice card.

If the couple is struggling, I would have a wonderful child's book sent directly from Barnes & Noble for them to teach the pleasures of reading to their son/daughter. A card would also be sent with a note indicating the book is being sent directly from Barnes and Noble, with my sincere joy for their bundle of joy.

Re: Birth announcement Question

Spacrazy — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 19:26:43 GMT

@Kitty Galore Awww, I really didn’t know anyone sent them anymore - it must be their first!

Our family still does this but the last one was 25 years ago. Hahaha. Therefore, I would be elated to go out to my mailbox and find one there. As other posters have mentioned you must decide for yourself but it sounds as though they are celebrating joy in their lives and wanted to include you (I’m smiling right now).

You have no obligation to fulfill so don’t worry regardless of what you do or not do.

Hope this helps.

Re: Birth announcement Question

chrystaltree — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 19:44:55 GMT

Between all the "daughters" in this post, I don't understand who sent the announcement but since you never met either the daughter or the grandaughter....it's gift grab. Sending a birth announcement to people you don't know is ridiculous. Since they used a stamp, I'd reciprocate and send them a lovely congratulations card.

Re: Birth announcement Question

CelticCrafter — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 20:30:06 GMT

If it were me the most I would do is send a card of congratulations.

Re: Birth announcement Question

sunshine45 — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 20:48:38 GMT

if i was friends with the grandmother and i received a card like this, i would probably send a little gift. it doesnt have to be anything extravagant. she may be registered on one of the sites and you could send something directly to the babys mother. you could then let the grandmother know OR send her a card congratulating the grandmother and briefly tell her you sent something for the baby.

Re: Birth announcement Question

Sooner — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 21:14:52 GMT

OP: It's a gift grab and you are obligated to send a gift. Doesn't have to be expensive, or it can be a gift card.

Re: Birth announcement Question

alicedee — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 21:32:48 GMT

I like the idea of sending a children’s book. Not very expensive, and a great gift, in my opinion.

Re: Birth announcement Question

ECBG — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 21:45:11 GMT

I would send a Grandmother's gift, like a brag book, or take the new grandmother out to lunch. You could also give the grandmother a "Baby's First Christmas" ornament at the lunch

Re: Birth announcement Question

Ladylaughsalot — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 21:54:51 GMT

I sent out birth announcements when my DS was born 25 years ago. I only wanted to share my joy with people from my hometown. (We’re a military family). I never expected or wanted any gifts, and would be mortified if people thought that is why I sent the announcements. That’s what baby showers are for.

Re: Birth announcement Question

Havarti — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 22:34:04 GMT

I think @ECBG suggested the perfect solution....

If you and your friend (the grandmother) still live in the same area I would take her out for lunch to celebrate her exciting entry into the wonderful world of being a grandparent. That way, you two are the people who reap the benefits of getting together as friends, you have acknowledged the joy she must be experiencing in her new role, and you know you have done something special for her.

As ECBG suggested, you might give her a Grandma's brag book for photos (although now-a-days most people just have them on their phone ready to share). After your lunch, you could send a card/note to the new mother letting her know how happy you are for her, that you decided to use the occasion to take her mom out to celebrate her very special role as a new grandmother. Let her know she proudly shared pictures of the baby with you and it is the most adorable baby ever. Thank her for giving you the opportunity to get together with a valued life-long friend to celebrate this wonderful new life and wish her & the baby girl well.

Re: Birth announcement Question

ECBG — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 22:37:42 GMT

@Havarti Thank you. That's what I did since grandmothers are far from the loop in many ways. They enjoy some of the attention as well. After all, she is your treasured friend, make it about HER as well!

Re: Birth announcement Question

blackhole99 — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 23:14:32 GMT

I would send my friend a congrats via card, email or Facebook to the new grandma, but no gift. Of course sending a gift is your own choice.

Re: Birth announcement Question

Sooner — Wed, 07 Aug 2019 23:31:07 GMT

@Ladylaughsalot wrote:
I sent out birth announcements when my DS was born 25 years ago. I only wanted to share my joy with people from my hometown. (We’re a military family). I never expected or wanted any gifts, and would be mortified if people thought that is why I sent the announcements. That’s what baby showers are for.

@Ladylaughsalot Did you specify "No gifts please?" If not, people assume you want a gift.

Re: Birth announcement Question

jannabelle1 — Thu, 08 Aug 2019 00:01:11 GMT

Do you talk to your friend frequently, or see her very often? It seems to be reaching a bit to send a birth announcement to the friend of the grandmother. If you are really close friends who communicate often, then I might send a small baby gift. If not super close, then I'd just send a congratulatory note or card.